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When did you have your first kid???


Renegade7

When did you have your first kid???  

55 members have voted

  1. 1. When did you have your first kid???

    • I don't have any kids
      9
    • under 18
      0
    • 18 - 24
      4
    • 25 - 30
      13
    • 31 - 34
      16
    • 35 - 40
      6
    • over 40
      2
    • I don't want kids
      5


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19 minutes ago, Mr. Sinister said:

Honestly id rather be older. I plan on staying in shape well into middle age, god forbid i suffer some injury that jeeps me from working out normally.

 

 

I think it helps to be wiser, and i stilling that wisdom in  children early. Every kid I knew growing up that had an older parent, i. Talking late 50's/60's, or for some reason was raised by their grandparents, was absurdly more mature and smarter than the average kid

 

 

Hmm my experience was not the same especially with the grandparents part.

 

"If you cal your grandma mom and your mom Pam, you going to jail."

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30.

 

I'm glad we waited until then, because we are able to afford a kid much easier than 5 years ago.

 

I'm also wondering if I would have been able to keep u if I waited until 37-38... But... i'm sure i'm just justifying my own decision....

 

What i'm sad about is that by waiting until 30, I waited until my parents were almost 60. There's a real question of whether they'll be around for high school graduation for our first, and I highly doubt the second. College graduation? Marriage? Great grandchildren? Unless they develop some miracle drugs... it's less than unlikely. That makes me sad.

 

Especially since I'm an only child, my parents are the only long-term family I have; I'm obviously building one now, but in terms of my life-long family, that's it. So it makes me sad to think how little they'll be a part of this in the grand scheme of things :(

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9 minutes ago, tshile said:

Especially since I'm an old child, my parents are the only long-term family I have; I'm obviously building one now, but in terms of my life-long family, that's it. So it makes me sad to think how little they'll be a part of this in the grand scheme of things :(

 

 

That's heavy, man, and I try not to think about it.  All my grandparents were gone by my mid-20s, my Mom has MS and my Dad scares me with how he's dealing with his health and still smoking cigarettes.  They'll be in their 60s by the time I have kids at this rate.

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Had my first at age 30 and my second at age 32.  Girl, then a boy.  Two is enough.  My wife and I enjoyed just being a young married couple for 4-5 years, before natures happy accidents occurred.

 

Note, we did always want at least two kids (back and forth between two and three) but the first happened earlier than we planned, and the second one came much faster than we planned.

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14 minutes ago, Renegade7 said:

 

That's heavy, man, and I try not to think about it.  All my grandparents were gone by my mid-20s, my Mom has MS and my Dad scares me with how he's dealing with his health and still smoking cigarettes.  They'll be in their 60s by the time I have kids at this rate.

Yeah, my parents health is not good for old age.

 

My grand parents were all passed by mid/late 20's, but they were at my wedding (physically, not mentally). Graduations. And I got a good 10-15 years of actually remembering hanging out with them.

 

I'm just hoping they make it till my kids are like 15. At least they'll have their own memories of my parents, not just pictures.

also, having my own kid has made me understand what a piece of **** i was as a child.

 

would have been nice to realize that sooner, maybe show my parents a little appreciation sooner in life. it doesn't take having a kid to do that, but it did for me.

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I'll just say having kids when you're younger you have more energy to chase around and do things actively with them.  Imagine you have a kid when you're 40, chasing a 10 year old around when you're 50 wears you out more than having a kid at 30 and chasing a 10 year-old around when you're 40.  

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6 minutes ago, China said:

I'll just say having kids when you're younger you have more energy to chase around and do things actively with them.  Imagine you have a kid when you're 40, chasing a 10 year old around when you're 50 wears you out more than having a kid at 30 and chasing a 10 year-old around when you're 40.  

 

We had boyzilla when I was 45, I'm keepin up.............

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21 for my first, 24 for my second.  being a parent isn't easy, and there are benefits and drawbacks to being a young parent or an old parent.  my youngest is about to be a junior, so she'll be off the family dole in roughly six years.  though our 20's were stressful and tight financially, our late 40's and 50's will be nice.

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17 hours ago, Mr. Sinister said:

Honestly id rather be older. I plan on staying in shape well into middle age, god forbid i suffer some injury that jeeps me from working out normally.

 

 

I think it helps to be wiser, and i stilling that wisdom in  children early. Every kid I knew growing up that had an older parent, i. Talking late 50's/60's, or for some reason was raised by their grandparents, was absurdly more mature and smarter than the average kid

For the most part, I agree,(sadly).

 

I guess Mrs Skinsfan and I are the exception.  We had ours at 18 and 25.  

 

Our oldest is an Army vet, earned his Masters, paid his own way through law school, was just sworn in as a 1st Lt and  accepted into the National Guard JAG program.  All of this, while helping to raise a family his own.

The youngest graduated from Towson, and is an instructor for a large Defense contractor. He's also a stage actor and a martial arts instructor on the side.

 

They both have their own homes, (the oldest owns two, one is a rental).    

If it sounds like I'm bragging, it's because I am! ;)

 

On a serious note...regrets at having them younger?  Not really. There were times when we couldn't afford to do things, or go out as often as we'd like.  We worked different shifts for a few years, and paid day care when we worked the same shifts. We did not pawn our kids off on to our parents.    

 

There are trade-offs...having them older means,(theoretically), that the parents are wiser and better off financially, but I know plenty of stupid, and strapped, people in their 40's, 50's and 60's .  Also, older people tend to have more physical ailments and physical limitations. I can't imagine having a young child in my 50's,  and dealing with all that it entails.  On the flip side, older parents have experienced more and, hopefully,  are more world-wise and better off financially.

What drives me nuts,(and I might get flamed for this) is the young parents, that expect their parents to watch their kids, full-time.  I know quite a few people,  in their 60's, who can't do ****,  because they're watching their grandkids. 

 

As if raising you wasn't enough, now they're watching yours?  Let them enjoy the time that they have left.  That is selfish, and wrong.  When you have kids, you are going to make sacrifices. Don't pawn that **** off on to your parents. If you can't afford kids, then don't have them.

 

 

 

 

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1 hour ago, dchogs said:

21 for my first, 24 for my second.  being a parent isn't easy, and there are benefits and drawbacks to being a young parent or an old parent.  my youngest is about to be a junior, so she'll be off the family dole in roughly six years.  though our 20's were stressful and tight financially, our late 40's and 50's will be nice.

Trust me, it is.  

We're empty-nesters, and have been for a while. Our late 40's kicked ass, our early 50's are kicking ass too!  

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I never wanted children, hence the first abortion. Back then, I couldn't find a doctor for a tubal ligation at 21. My daughter was basically an accident too, and I won't go into why here. So I decided to raise her. I have my granddaughter too now and that's cool. 

 

To those folks who decide to forego having children, I think that their decision should be accepted just like we accept folks who want children. And those who take responsibility for their reproductive choices like Riggo-Toni are to be commended.

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19 hours ago, tshile said:

 

 

What i'm sad about is that by waiting until 30, I waited until my parents were almost 60. There's a real question of whether they'll be around for high school graduation for our first, and I highly doubt the second. College graduation? Marriage? Great grandchildren? Unless they develop some miracle drugs... it's less than unlikely. That makes me sad.

 

 

 

Yes my one regret in waiting is that my mother-in-law never got to see her grandchildren.  She passed away a few years before my first daughter was born.  She survived the first bout of Cancer and was present and excited at our wedding, but the cancer came back and ultimately took her.  She was a great mother to my wife and her siblings, really the backbone of that family unit.  

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Had my son when I was 40 and my daughter when I was 41 (about to turn 42).  MY wife is 10 years younger than me, so she is the one with all of the energy.  I agree with those who have said that older is harder because of energy.  I look at the parents of my son's friends out there having a great time as I have to do a lot more resting.  Also, friends of mine who are empty nesters and they are my age.  I have a while before that happens.  Looking at paying for college and retiring at about the same time.  Fun!

On the other hand, there is NO way I could have had children when I was in my 20s.  I had no patience and was a bit immature.  I think being older has helped me  be a better dad. 

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I have a younger wife. Never wanted kids. Considering it now. She never wanted kids either, I would not have dated her otherwise. 

I guess that sometimes you think about the folks raising the kids and find someone that would be a good parent. 

We both love kids, and are really good with kids, all of our friends want us to have kids...

 

Side note: She has a cycle that is due pretty soon...Hmmm...seems late. 

 

I would love to have a little Kosh to raise and teach at this point. 

Back then, I don't think I was ready or interested. 

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