China Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 Wyoming Man Found with 30 Eyeballs in his Anal Cavity CASPER, Wyo. – Police made a routine traffic stop early Thursday morning and got more than they bargained for when Roy Tilbott, 51, stepped out of his El Camino for a field sobriety test and Casper police noticed several eyeballs slide from his right pant leg onto the road. Feeling they could have a potential murderer on their hands, police quickly drew guns and cuffed Tilbott. Tilbott assured police the eyeballs were not human, but instead cow eyeballs he had pilfered from Johnson Meats (a slaughterhouse) where Tilbott is employed as a butcher. “Company won’t let us take animal scraps home and instead toss them in the landfill,” Tilbott said in the police report. “They’re a very wasteful company. We should be allowed to take scrap meat and other parts home. The company should start a green initiative. They don’t even have recycling at the plant.” What a cow eye from his brown eye may look like Tilbott explained his actions: “I enjoy eating bovine eyeballs and smuggling them out in my colon was the only way I knew how to get them out without potentially getting caught and fired.” Tilbott told police he estimates he has smuggled several thousand eyeballs from the plant over the past few months. “I put them in soups,” Tilbott said in the police report. “They’re beneficial for erectile dysfunction, which I currently battle, but I also just like the texture and taste.” Click on the link for the full article http://kisscasper.com/hoax-casper-man-smuggling-eyeballs/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dfitzo53 Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 Thanks for keeping an eye on the wacky news for us, China. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barney B Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 No doubt he'll get fired just for sticking some dead cow eyeballs in his rectum. Where will this political correctness end? Tilbott explained his actions: “I enjoy eating bovine eyeballs and smuggling them out in my colon was the only way I knew how to get them out without potentially getting caught and fired.” Good thing he doesn't prefer the hooves. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skinsmarydu Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 I actually jumped in my chair when I read the "taste & texture" part.Holy cow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larry Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 Holy cow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Springfield Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 I don't even... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Slateman Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 Helluva Friday night. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RemoveSnyder Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 This can only help the causes of recycling and industrial green ecology. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcsluggo Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 this story is just bull... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
elkabong82 Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 That's how you get pink eye Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Malapropismic Depository Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 I actually jumped in my chair when I read the "taste & texture" part. Holy cow. More like Hole-y Cow Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bcl05 Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 Or cow-ey hole. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corcaigh Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 A cow's eye is about the size of a golf ball. 30 of them. In his anal cavity. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
daveakl Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 A cow's eye is about the size of a golf ball. 30 of them. In his anal cavity. Agreed. Seems low to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larry Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 A cow's eye is about the size of a golf ball. 30 of them. In his anal cavity. And he's taking them home, to eat them. Officer: Sir, have you been drinking, or do you just have 30 cow eyeballs up your ****? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrSilverMaC Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 GodJesusWTF..... Please tell me this is a bad attempt at satire? "Just trying to keep an eye on my health officer." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoony Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 To save time do you suppose he just drank the marinade? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
balki1867 Posted July 26, 2015 Share Posted July 26, 2015 this story is just bull... bullseye ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PCS Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 Ya know,I'm not sure if China needs therapy after finding all this **** or I do after reading all this ****. * Maybe both. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larry Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 Some day, some forensic tech is going to have to go through China's search and browsing history. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wysknz1 Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 If you've ever been to Casper you'd understand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zguy28 Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 I'm guessing nobody read the spoiler link? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjfootballer Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 Eye did. Eye had enough vision and foresight to see it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dfitzo53 Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 I wonder if the first thing he said to the officer was, "But I..." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skinsfan1523 Posted July 27, 2015 Share Posted July 27, 2015 The spoiler is no fun though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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