Is ok to take a girl to a nice/expensive restaurant on a first date?

[DallasBlowsBig]

I was wondering, I asked this girl out on a date and she said yes, and I know the feelingss are the same for both of us, and while she would probably be ok with a average restaurant like Outback, I want to go the extra mile and just show her how much I like her, but I also don't want to creep her out, what do you guys think? I am not exactly the ladies man so any advice would be great, thanks

[No Excuses]

Don't do a food date for the first one, especially at a fancy expensive restaurant. You wanna enjoy the food or talk to her?

That's just me though. I hate lunch/dinner dates. Horrible for one to one interaction.

[CrypticVillain]

If you can afford it, why not? Besides, don't let the restaurant impress her, you should be focusing on impressing her yourself. :2cents:

[Hubbs]

Don't do a food date for the first one, especially at a fancy expensive restaurant. You wanna enjoy the food or talk to her?

That's just me though. I hate lunch/dinner dates. Horrible for one to one interaction.

Horrible for one-on-one interaction? Do you have the conversational abilities of a blender?

That said, I'd never go fancy on the first date. Too formal. I agree with MLSKINS - the restaurant shouldn't be the star of the night. But I wouldn't go for a chain restaurant like Outback, either. Find something relatively unique. Sites like Yelp can be good for discovering new places.

[Mickalino]

It depends.

When you first met her, did you call you Mom immediately afterwards and exclaim, "Momma !! I just met the girl I'm gonna marry !!"

[No Excuses]

Horrible for one-on-one interaction? Do you have the conversational abilities of a blender?

Stiff body language, focusing on eating, formal setting, over priced food. You barely get to know the person over food talk. You can't get a read for their overall body language towards you. Maybe horrible is an over statement, but there are a lot of better things you can do on a first/second date than formal dining.

I'd hold onto the food dates until you've developed a comfort level beforehand with the girl.

[Duckus]

There are so many middle options between Ourback and an over the top expensive place for a first date. Take her to a small, non-chain restaurant that is comfortable and interesting. You don't want a stuffy 5 star restuant for the first date and you really don't want a mega chain like outback.

Yelp is your friend.

[Die Hard]

I don't know why I'm bothering.... but take it from me as a 37-year old married guy

There's no appetizer or entre that's going to compensate for your lack of personality, humor, charm, etc. Regardless of the restaurant.

So what I'm saying is... you asked her out on a date. By virtue of that... she knows you're interested. By virtue of the fact that she said yes... she's interested as well.

You closing the deal will have nothing to do with the price tag on the food, the language of the food stuffs on the menu... or the name of the restaurant atop the the facility. It has everything to do with you both... and the chemistry.

Going an "extra mile" is something you should reserve for special people/occasions. Not just anybody who agrees to go on a date with you. That reaks of desperation and over-compensation.

But hey, if you've got nothing else going for you.....

[Gibbs Hog Heaven]

Ah, the perennial guy worry of what's good to impress on a first date.

A lot of guys now are moving away from the dinner/movie date and going for something more adventurous. I guess it depends on the personality of the girl your trying to impress, I personally think dinners still a great first date. You want good, relaxed conversation when your first getting to know someone, and good food tends to take some of the focus off of you so your not feeling like you have to talk constantly. But rather than the cost of the meal/place; I'd think of taking her somewhere completely different, like a little hole-in-the-wall place somewhere she's probably never been. Or a different style of food that's not common to either of you. Sharing new experiences together is a great way to build a fast connection and add some fun and excitement to your date.

Good luck what ever you go with man. Sounds like you really like this gal'.

Hail.

[Bubble Screen]

I was wondering, I asked this girl out on a date and she said yes, and I know the feelingss are the same for both of us, and while she would probably be ok with a average restaurant like Outback, I want to go the extra mile and just show her how much I like her, but I also don't want to creep her out, what do you guys think? I am not exactly the ladies man so any advice would be great, thanks

Is it ok? Sure. However, its lame. It means you're trying too hard. Don't be "that guy". Your Outback suggestion is much more acceptable on a first date.

[Springfield]

Ask her what kind of food she likes and go to a place that meets her needs. That way you can choose a place that suits your needs while also suiting hers.

[Mickalino]

It also depends on what rate structure that you're paying for her companionship, and "extra services".

If it is an "overnight escort", as opposed to hourly escort, you've already got the primary expenses and benefits built into the companionship package, so there's no point in spending extra and splurging on the meal.

[G.A.C.O.L.B.]

Restaurants fine. I agree it should be a unique place and not some generic Outback type of restaurant. That said, I think it should be a place you've been to before. Max comfort and you can focus on her. If there's a 2nd date you all can start experimenting together.

[Gibbs Hog Heaven]

It also depends on what rate structure that you're paying for her companionship, and "extra services".

If it is an "overnight escort", as opposed to hourly escort, you've already got the primary expenses and benefits built into the companionship package, so there's no point in spending extra and splurging on the meal.

Screw that. If it's an "escort" of any sort, any and all "eating" will be done of each other. NO exceptions.

*Disclaimer* So I'd imagine if I was ever in that situation.

Hail.

[abdcskins]

Nothing wrong with that at all.

[Kosher Ham]

First of all what's the budget ?

[Hubbs]

Stiff body language, focusing on eating, formal setting, over priced food.

...which is probably why I said to not go formal. :pfft:

Nothing wrong with that at all.

Nope. I mean, except for the fact that you're putting huge pressure on her the very first time you're in a "dating" setting, you're probably forcing her to choose a dinner she doesn't really want because she's afraid of ordering the expensive stuff that's actually good, you're making everything far too formal which in turn makes her feel as though she can't open up as much as she would like, you're coming off as too desperate, and you're taking a big hit to your wallet for a girl who you might not want anything to do with in a week. But yeah, besides all of that, there's nothing wrong with the idea.

[CoolUsernameHere]

I wouldn't go the "fancy" route. If I was a woman, I'd feel pretty intimidated and rather uncomfortable if a guy took me to a really nice restaurant on a first date. But I'm not a woman, so maybe I've completely missed the mark. I say go for the "hole-in-the-wall" idea that has been mentioned, or somewhere where the lady will feel comfortable, and you can get to know each other. You don't even have to go to dinner. Just do something fun.

Then again, I'm only 20 and have had one girlfriend that I consider really serious, so I'm not as experienced on the subject as most people here. Maybe you shouldn't listen to me.

[joeknows]

dunno if the weather supports this idea there yet but...... picnic. nothing better than pulling a nice pinot grigio from the basket. just make sure you pick a nice picturesque setting.

i have found chicks dig picnics. shows you put some thought into it and its a bit off the beaten path.

[polywog999]

A fancy first date will usually lead to disappointment. Go out for coffee, walk around the lake, etc. Don't spend a lot of cash! It sends the wrong message; to her AND to you.

[CrabR]

I did.........................she married me 10 months later

[PeterMP]

I'd certainly not go somewhere you aren't familiar with or that you aren't going to be comfortable with. If you're uncomfortable at fancy restaurants, then I wouldn't go.

[Thiebear]

Take her to the cheese factory

Or a wine tasting / micro brew restaraunt. win/win

Luray Caverns and mention they also have a large natural organ. walk around, grab that hand and have things to talk about when you leave.

If you're near ole town Alexandria its nice out, they love walking down the sidewalks and browsing and eating at a place that 'jumps' out at the both of you.

If its outside and you stay together that is instant points... a memory that lasts.

[Skin'Em84]

dunno if the weather supports this idea there yet but...... picnic. nothing better than pulling a nice pinot grigio from the basket. just make sure you pick a nice picturesque setting.

i have found chicks dig picnics. shows you put some thought into it and its a bit off the beaten path.

Word.

[Rudechain]

A first date should be fun for both of you. A restaurant is a nice idea, but I think your selling yourself short. If there is something you both enjoy doing ( bowling, darts, movies or something like that.)

The first date I had with the woman I married, we went to a concert in a public park. Before the show, we grabbed a light meal and after the show we stopped for a drink before taking her home.

Not a whole lot of money was spent, we had a chance to enjoy each others company in a semi-intimate setting, and a needed distraction during those quiet moments you get in every date.

Good luck.