Westbrook36 Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Nothing makes me more pissed than when douchebags force books on you thinking "Thought you might enjoy this read, Westy". It creates an uncomfortable situation. I am picky about most things in life. I know what I like to eat, what I like to drink, what I like to read, what ***** I like to ****. I don't need some jerkoff trying to come off as well read projecting his intelligence onto others by means of books they have read. I'll seriously have a 5 minute conversation with someone in the embassy at lunch about finance or politics and then be forced to tap dance the next day when they thought "I'd enjoy" whatever piece of **** book they had collecting dust on their bookshelf. The thing is, there is no polite way to get out of not reading the book. You accept it. If you do/don't read the book, eventually you are going to give it back to the guy. Inevitably, he is going to ask you how you enjoyed it. ****! I have like literally 5 books in my house that jerkoffs gave to me. I never do this to anyone else. Get your own goddamn books. My mom used to do that all the time with her alternative health pamphlets. I finally told her I wasn't going to read anything she gave me because I didn't agree with 99% of it. It took her a little while but she finally stopped. Although, it's a lot easier to tell your family members that you want them to stop pushing their crazy on you. Some ******* tried to give me a book written by Bernake. I was like, that guy is the worst human being in America. He belongs in jail. I wouldn't read that book if you paid me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joeknows Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 a simple no thank you seems to be much more healthy than all this anger. i dunno... i love to read and i cant say i have ever been upset about someone giving me a book. if it is a political book, which would bore me to tears, i just say no thank you. its not that hard Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ixcuincle Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Not much worth reading other than cooking books and sports books anymore Hey Westy You should read this book Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bang Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Just color inside the lines and you'll be fine. ~Bang Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
December90 Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Just struggle through that copy of Green Eggs and Ham and then give them back their book. Tell them you liked the surprise ending:) (Who knew green eggs and ham could be so good?) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
No Excuses Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Become one of them and pass on their book to someone else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kosher Ham Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Tell them you read it already and don't remember most of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dfitzo53 Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 I have this great book on anger management you should read. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lombardi's_kid_brother Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 You expect me to believe that you have friends who are literate? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corcaigh Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 You should make them a mix tape of songs you think they'd like. After you've had sex you can discuss the book and the music selection. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Sassy Molassy Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 You expect me to believe that you have friends who are literate? Done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Brave Little Toaster Oven Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 do what every college kid does - sparknotes/wikipedia....jesus....not that hard :doh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prosperity Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 you have books? Try this one out, it's almost a religious experience. I don't think it has any pictures though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thiebear Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Flip through it real quick and hand it back. "I don't read nothin without pictures." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebluefood Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Westy's literate? Huh, imagine that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TD_washingtonredskins Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Just color inside the lines and you'll be fine.~Bang Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DRSmith Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 I do not mind people giving me books or suggesting authors I would have never read pillars of the earth had it not been for someone else giving it to me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoony Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Speaking of pompous book douches, how about the guy with the scarf sitting in Starbucks reading a book and sipping on a an espresso? "hey ********, Hemingway moved to Spain first. The scene just isn't happening for you in pigsknuckle arkansas... or didn't you notice? Matter of fact, why not skip the trip to spain and buy a shotgun and move down to the keys." *edited for good taste* Or that extra special captain in the douche army, the guy at Panera bread spread out on a table with his laptop pretending like he's doing actual work, and isn't really just trying to escape the miserableness of his existence in his parents' basement. But none of them can top His Royal Douchiness, the guy with the iPad that lifts it up while he's using it so everyone can see. Spend some time in an airport and you'll spot him. As for people that recommend books, I enjoy it, actually. I wish more people recommended good books. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjah Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Borrow the book, get a lighter, char the edges just a bit all the way around, and then return it. Tell the lender that your "other" circle of friends didn't care too much for that book, and it was all you could do to rescue it in the nick of time. Good thing it was on top of the pile, where you could find it by the light of the full moon and flame. Whew! Word will get around, and nobody will come near you with a book ever again. Also, setting things on fire is a great way to work through that anger issue. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tweedr01 Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 This thread after the OP is gold. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Burgold Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 A friend gave me this book in college and I have subsequently gifted it to a number of friends. I htink you are in need of it. I recommend it. The first time I read it I was content for like six months. You are so full of grumpitude that a great, insightful, and funny book would do you good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DRSmith Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Soory but Winnie the Pooh is nothing but a reflection of all of societiy's ills Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mistertim Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 Westy's literate? Huh, imagine that. I don't think he is. That is probably the source of all the anger. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Brave Little Toaster Oven Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 I don't think he is. That is probably the source of all the anger. I think we should all chip in and pay for his tuition here: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ixcuincle Posted March 29, 2011 Share Posted March 29, 2011 He's illiterate becausea there are no popular sports books about the Phillies or Eagles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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