CNN: Actually, that's not in the Bible

Actually, that's not in the Bible

(CNN) – NFL legend Mike Ditka was giving a news conference one day after being fired as the coach of the Chicago Bears when he decided to quote the Bible.

“Scripture tells you that all things shall pass,” a choked-up Ditka said after leading his team to only five wins during the previous season. “This, too, shall pass.”

Ditka fumbled his biblical citation, though. The phrase “This, too, shall pass” doesn’t appear in the Bible. Ditka was quoting a phantom scripture that sounds like it belongs in the Bible, but look closer and it’s not there.

Ditka’s biblical blunder is as common as preachers delivering long-winded public prayers. The Bible may be the most revered book in America, but it’s also one of the most misquoted. Politicians, motivational speakers, coaches - all types of people - quote passages that actually have no place in the Bible, religious scholars say.

These phantom passages include:

“God helps those who help themselves.”

“Spare the rod, spoil the child.”

And there is this often-cited paraphrase: Satan tempted Eve to eat the forbidden apple in the Garden of Eden.

None of those passages appear in the Bible, and one is actually anti-biblical, scholars say.

But people rarely challenge them because biblical ignorance is so pervasive that it even reaches groups of people who should know better, says Steve Bouma-Prediger, a religion professor at Hope College in Holland, Michigan.

“In my college religion classes, I sometimes quote 2 Hesitations 4:3 (‘There are no internal combustion engines in heaven’),” Bouma-Prediger says. “I wait to see if anyone realizes that there is no such book in the Bible and therefore no such verse.

“Only a few catch on.”

Few catch on because they don’t want to - people prefer knowing biblical passages that reinforce their pre-existing beliefs, a Bible professor says.

“Most people who profess a deep love of the Bible have never actually read the book,” says Rabbi Rami Shapiro, who once had to persuade a student in his Bible class at Middle Tennessee State University that the saying “this dog won’t hunt” doesn’t appear in the Book of Proverbs.

“They have memorized parts of texts that they can string together to prove the biblical basis for whatever it is they believe in,” he says, “but they ignore the vast majority of the text."

Phantom biblical passages work in mysterious ways

Ignorance isn’t the only cause for phantom Bible verses. Confusion is another.

Some of the most popular faux verses are pithy paraphrases of biblical concepts or bits of folk wisdom.

Consider these two:

“God works in mysterious ways.”

“Cleanliness is next to Godliness.”

Both sound as if they are taken from the Bible, but they’re not. The first is a paraphrase of a 19th century hymn by the English poet William Cowper (“God moves in a mysterious way, His wonders to perform).

The “cleanliness” passage was coined by John Wesley, the 18th century evangelist who founded Methodism, says Thomas Kidd, a history professor at Baylor University in Texas.

“No matter if John Wesley or someone else came up with a wise saying - if it sounds proverbish, people figure it must come from the Bible,” Kidd says.

Our fondness for the short and tweet-worthy may also explain our fondness for phantom biblical phrases. The pseudo-verses function like theological tweets: They’re pithy summarizations of biblical concepts.

“Spare the rod, spoil the child” falls into that category. It’s a popular verse - and painful for many kids. Could some enterprising kid avoid the rod by pointing out to his mother that it's not in the Bible?

It’s doubtful. Her possible retort: The popular saying is a distillation of Proverbs 13:24: “The one who withholds [or spares] the rod is one who hates his son.”

Another saying that sounds Bible-worthy: “Pride goes before a fall.” But its approximation, Proverbs 16:18, is actually written: “Pride goeth before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall.”

There are some phantom biblical verses for which no excuse can be offered. The speaker goofed.

That’s what Bruce Wells, a theology professor, thinks happened to Ditka, the former NFL coach, when he strayed from the gridiron to biblical commentary during his 1993 press conference in Chicago.

Wells watched Ditka’s biblical blunder on local television when he lived in Chicago. After Ditka cited the mysterious passage, reporters scrambled unsuccessfully the next day to find the biblical source.

They should have consulted Wells, who is now director of the ancient studies program at Saint Joseph’s University in Pennsylvania. Wells says Ditka’s error probably came from a peculiar feature of the King James Bible.

“My hunch on the Ditka quote is that it comes from a quirk of the King James translation,” Wells says. “Ancient Hebrew had a particular way of saying things like, ‘and the next thing that happened was…’ The King James translators of the Old Testament consistently rendered this as ‘and it came to pass.’ ’’

When phantom Bible passages turn dangerous

People may get verses wrong, but they also mangle plenty of well-known biblical stories as well.

Two examples: The scripture never says a whale swallowed Jonah, the Old Testament prophet, nor did any New Testament passages say that three wise men visited baby Jesus, scholars say.

Those details may seem minor, but scholars say one popular phantom Bible story stands above the rest: The Genesis story about the fall of humanity.

Most people know the popular version - Satan in the guise of a serpent tempts Eve to pick the forbidden apple from the Tree of Life. It’s been downhill ever since.

But the story in the book of Genesis never places Satan in the Garden of Eden.

“Genesis mentions nothing but a serpent,” says Kevin Dunn, chair of the department of religion at Tufts University in Massachusetts.

“Not only does the text not mention Satan, the very idea of Satan as a devilish tempter postdates the composition of the Garden of Eden story by at least 500 years,” Dunn says.

Getting biblical scriptures and stories wrong may not seem significant, but it can become dangerous, one scholar says.

Most people have heard this one: “God helps those that help themselves.” It’s another phantom scripture that appears nowhere in the Bible, but many people think it does. It's actually attributed to Benjamin Franklin, one of the nation's founding fathers.

The passage is popular in part because it is a reflection of cherished American values: individual liberty and self-reliance, says Sidnie White Crawford, a religious studies scholar at the University of Nebraska.

Yet that passage contradicts the biblical definition of goodness: defining one’s worth by what one does for others, like the poor and the outcast, Crawford says.

Crawford cites a scripture from Leviticus that tells people that when they harvest the land, they should leave some “for the poor and the alien” (Leviticus 19:9-10), and another passage from Deuteronomy that declares that people should not be “tight-fisted toward your needy neighbor.”

Click on the link for the full article

Ehhh...Almost.

But funny to have a list of them.

I remember a nun asked me once during my first communion classes, "What do you know about the bible?" ... I said, "God only helps those who help themselves." She got a good laugh and was like , no son, that's not in the bible.

"Spare the rod and spoil the child" is not a direct quote, but an axiom based on biblical teachings such as the following:

Proverbs 22:15 - Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child; The rod of correction will drive it far from him.

Proverbs 23:13, 14 - Do not withhold correction from a child, For if you beat him with a rod, he will not die. You shall beat him with a rod, And deliver his soul from hell.

Proverbs 29:15 - The rod and rebuke give wisdom, But a child left to himself brings shame to his mother.

As for God Helps those who help themselves.... Here is what the bible says on that score..

Jer 17:5 (NIV) This is what the LORD says: "Cursed is the one who trusts in man, who depends on flesh for his strength and whose heart turns away from the LORD."

Prov 28:26 (NIV) He who trusts in himself is a fool...

But I always took that message from a parable Jesus told. were two brothers were given money by their father.. One son invested his money and lost everything, the other son burried his money and after a number of years both reported back to their father. The father praised the one who invested, took risks and lost and rebuked the one who hoarded his money...

Which I always kind of took god helps those who help themselves.

---------- Post added June-6th-2011 at 02:15 PM ----------

I remember a nun asked me once during my first communion classes, "What do you know about the bible?" ... I said, "God only helps those who help themselves." She got a good laugh and was like , no son, that's not in the bible.

My sister interviewed for a job teaching English in Japan. The interviewer asked her if she had read any Japanese literature. She said yes he like Shogun.. :doh:

The japanese fellow must have had pity on her, cause she got the job.

Just wait until her supporters start rewriting the Old Testament to support Sarah Palin's next gaffe as being theologically supported reasoning.

Seriously though, no way can any sane person read the OT and still be a fundamentalist/hyper-literalist. I don't attend church, but consider myself very well-educated insofar as the Bible and its corresponding history are concerned. It never ceases to baffle me how many overtly pious people are clueless when it comes to their own religious texts.

My sister interviewed for a job teaching English in Japan. The interviewer asked her if she had read any Japanese literature. She said yes he like Shogun.. :doh:

The japanese fellow must have had pity on her, cause she got the job.

Either that or he got such a good laugh from the gaffe that he figured if nothing more she could periodically provide comic relief.

It is a big book and easy to misquote. I like to paraphrase myself, because "the devil is in the details."

This phrase works both ways. When people only slightly misquote something, there is no reason to jump all over them about it if they aren't arguing too hard. For example Mrs. Palin talking about Paul Revere - she mostly got it right and we all know the basic story. If you aren't a scholar, then you shouldn't be putting her down because of the way she worded her statement. Hate = Devil

The one that always bothers me is "God helps those who help themselves." The reason is because it's counter to the whole messgae of the Gospel. If we could help ourselves, Jesus would not have needed to come and take our punishment for us. It feeds the notion that we can somehow do something good on our own, then God will help us.

Memorizing every word as a requirement would take this tough club up to the L. Ron Hubbard levels.

You start a noob: Only the 10 commandments and a prayer to eat.

work your way up by chapter/verse.

Actually, that's not in the Bible

(CNN)

Two examples: The scripture never says a whale swallowed Jonah, the Old Testament prophet

Click on the link for the full article

This is kind of an odd one for them to point out/claim. The verse doesn't use the word whale but it specifically said that God prepared a great fish to swallow Jonah and that he spent three days and nights in the belly of the fish. I doubt that Jonah himself would have differentiated between a whale or a fish.

The one that always bothers me is "God helps those who help themselves." The reason is because it's counter to the whole messgae of the Gospel. If we could help ourselves, Jesus would not have needed to come and take our punishment for us. It feeds the notion that we can somehow do something good on our own, then God will help us.

I never read it like that.

I always read it as those who actively do good to better themselves will find Life accommodating and helpful in their pursuits, because God has organized things to flow that way. Conversely, those who do bad or make bad decisions will find Life offering resistance.

This is all I can think about.....

“Spare the rod, spoil the child” falls into that category. It’s a popular verse - and painful for many kids. Could some enterprising kid avoid the rod by pointing out to his mother that it's not in the Bible?

It’s doubtful. Her possible retort: The popular saying is a distillation of Proverbs 13:24: “The one who withholds [or spares] the rod is one who hates his son.”

That's a pretty weak argument lol ...

Seriously though, no way can any sane person read the OT and still be a fundamentalist/hyper-literalist.

Hyper-literalists...are those the ones that think God is literally a rock?

I don't find the biblical reference necessarily wrong:

All things must pass

Meaning: Nothing lasts forever.

Origin: From the Bible, Matthew 24:6-8 (King James Version):

And ye shall hear of wars and rumours of wars: see that ye be not troubled: for all these things must come to pass, but the end is not yet.

For nation shall rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom: and there shall be famines, and pestilences, and earthquakes, in divers places.

All these are the beginning of sorrows.

But it's pretty clear Ditka was actually referencing this similar saying:

The story, generally attached to a nameless "Eastern monarch", became popular in the West in the first half of the 19th century, appearing in American papers by at least 1839.[3] In 1852, the English poet Edward Fitzgerald included a brief version in his collection Polonius: A Collection of Wise Saws and Modern Instances. Fitzgerald's unattributed version, titled "Solomon's Seal", describes a sultan requesting of King Solomon a sentence that would always be true in good times or bad; Solomon responds, "This too will pass away".[3] On September 30, 1859, Abraham Lincoln included a similar story in an address before the Wisconsin State Agricultural Society in Milwaukee:

It is said an Eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence, to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him the words: "And this, too, shall pass away." How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! How consoling in the depths of affliction![cite this quote]

I never read it like that.

I always read it as those who actively do good to better themselves will find Life accommodating and helpful in their pursuits, because God has organized things to flow that way. Conversely, those who do bad or make bad decisions will find Life offering resistance.

I like a phrase I heard one time: "Grace is not opposed to effort. It is opposed to earning. Effort is action; earning is attitude."

I read this article yesterday, and what stood out the most was this:

But often the milkmaid, the cobbler - and the NFL coach - start creating biblical passages without the guidance of biblical experts, he says.

“You can see this manifest today in living room Bible studies across North America where lovely Christian people, with no training whatsoever, drink decaf, eat brownies and ask each other, ‘What does this text mean to you?’’’ Hazen says.

“Not only do they get the interpretation wrong, but very often end up quoting verses that really aren’t there.”

Comes across as one arrogant dude, who looks down at those silly uneducated people who try to actually read the bible without expert guidance.

I think he wants to go back to before the Reformation and not let the masses read it.

I read this article yesterday, and what stood out the most was this:

But often the milkmaid, the cobbler - and the NFL coach - start creating biblical passages without the guidance of biblical experts, he says.

“You can see this manifest today in living room Bible studies across North America where lovely Christian people, with no training whatsoever, drink decaf, eat brownies and ask each other, ‘What does this text mean to you?’’’ Hazen says.

“Not only do they get the interpretation wrong, but very often end up quoting verses that really aren’t there.”

Comes across as one arrogant dude, who looks down at those silly uneducated people who try to actually read the bible without expert guidance.

I think he wants to go back to before the Reformation and not let the masses read it.

No kidding. Paint a picture of a worst case scenario and assume all home based bible studies go that way. You could just as easily say, "You can see boring preachers droning on to sleeping congregants who wish he would just shut up." That's not my experience but as long as we're stereotyping...

There are going to be 5 different living room bible studies from our church going on tonight around the Owings MIlls area and they've been trained to ask questions like:

Who is writing or speaking and to whom?

When/where does this take place?

What problems were the recipients facing?/Why did the author write this?

How does this passage fit with what the author has been saying elsewhere in this letter or book?

What do you learn about God/Jesus/Holy Spirit from this text?

What does this passage tell you about the human condition and does it address anything in your life?

You certainly don't have to go to Seminary in order ask good questions.

I read this article yesterday, and what stood out the most was this:

But often the milkmaid, the cobbler - and the NFL coach - start creating biblical passages without the guidance of biblical experts, he says.

“You can see this manifest today in living room Bible studies across North America where lovely Christian people, with no training whatsoever, drink decaf, eat brownies and ask each other, ‘What does this text mean to you?’’’ Hazen says.

“Not only do they get the interpretation wrong, but very often end up quoting verses that really aren’t there.”

Comes across as one arrogant dude, who looks down at those silly uneducated people who try to actually read the bible without expert guidance.

I think he wants to go back to before the Reformation and not let the masses read it.

In the short time during my adulthood when I actually did attend a few Bible studies, they were NOTHING like that description. And I really didn't like going to them, so I have no reason to prop them up. For the most part, they were casual-yet-serious and intelligent discussions of different Bible passages.

<Note old thread being bumped>

Long story, but I was just talking "haters" in PM re: the stadium, and up came some serious "Biblical hating" references--wowsa!

Psalm 139:22

(note Wesley's and Matthew Hardy's comments towards bottom--those guys were serious players )

http://bible.cc/psalms/139-22.htm

But I always took that message from a parable Jesus told. were two brothers were given money by their father.. One son invested his money and lost everything, the other son burried his money and after a number of years both reported back to their father. The father praised the one who invested, took risks and lost and rebuked the one who hoarded his money...

Which I always kind of took god helps those who help themselves.

Really? I honestly never heard the Prodigal Son referenced that way. The story is about forgiving people who have messed up and are sorry and that they deserve forgiveness and love along with those who never strayed. Even if it seems like they shouldn't deserve it and only those who "behave" should be rewarded.

<Note old thread being bumped>

Long story, but I was just talking "haters" in PM re: the stadium, and up came some serious "Biblical hating" references--wowsa!

Psalm 139:22

(note Wesley's and Matthew Hardy's comments towards bottom--those guys were serious players )

http://bible.cc/psalms/139-22.htm

I laughed out loud.

This article is annoying (yes, I see it's from 2011, it's still annoying). Just because you don't know the verses word for word doesn't mean that you don't understand them or what the message is. It doesn't specifically say it's a whale, but it is sad that it's a huge fish.

The serpent isn't specifically said to be Satan in Genesis, but Satan is specifically said to be a serpent in other books, such as in Revelations. That being said, one can assume that even if the actual snake is not Satan, the serpent represents Satan as it is all that is evil...which is basically ...well, Satan. (Though no, I do not know the exact passage and verse, if homeboy knows the Bible so well I'm sure he would know to which verses I am referring). Another thing to consider is that the serpent is physically a real snake, but also one that has been taken over by Satan.

:Shrug:

I went to Catholic school for 12 years and I don't even know how many times I've read the Bible, but I still can't usually quote more than what book a verse is from. And I can paraphrase what they mean. Does that mean if I don't quote something verbatim I'm an ignorant Catholic?

Honestly, if you quoted something to me and said it was from the Bible (except the examples that were given, I honestly never heard anyone claim that "God works in mysterious ways" nor "God helps those who helps themselves" as Bible quotes, though I know there are plenty of passages in the Bible which prove these quotes to be true...) I'm not 100% sure if I would know if it was definitely in there. Then again, there are also like 30 different Bibles just for the English language.

Pretty sure that, although these people are wrong, none of them seem to be running around saying "THE BIBLE SAYS THERE ARE FIVE GODS AND TO HATE YOUR NEIGHBOR"

Not that I'm saying people should go around misquoting the Bible, but this Wells dude just seems like an ass.

And it's 4:40AM so I'm allowed to be cranky and sensitive. I don't think my post is probably even organized, but oh well.

Mreh, misquoting the bible, making **** up, using it to back whatever you want, tomato tomato. "Using" the religion is better than a PBA card. We've discussed how people warp it to meet their needs plenty of times.

Shouldn't eat shrimp or work on Sundays. You can kill people and be rewarded, but being gay might cause a hurricane. Factual evidence regarding religion falls into the same flushing hole as military intelligence.

I read this article yesterday, and what stood out the most was this:

But often the milkmaid, the cobbler - and the NFL coach - start creating biblical passages without the guidance of biblical experts, he says.

“You can see this manifest today in living room Bible studies across North America where lovely Christian people, with no training whatsoever, drink decaf, eat brownies and ask each other, ‘What does this text mean to you?’’’ Hazen says.

“Not only do they get the interpretation wrong, but very often end up quoting verses that really aren’t there.”

Comes across as one arrogant dude, who looks down at those silly uneducated people who try to actually read the bible without expert guidance.

I think he wants to go back to before the Reformation and not let the masses read it.

Yet few people would say it was arrogance to submit to the opinion of a trained medical professional.

---------- Post added November-28th-2012 at 08:38 AM ----------

Mreh, misquoting the bible, making **** up, using it to back whatever you want, tomato tomato. "Using" the religion is better than a PBA card. We've discussed how people warp it to meet their needs plenty of times.

Shouldn't eat shrimp or work on Sundays. You can kill people and be rewarded, but being gay might cause a hurricane. Factual evidence regarding religion falls into the same flushing hole as military intelligence.

We get it you don't like religion, you don't need to enter every religious thread on here and post the same weak diatribe.

"Most people who profess a deep love of the Bible have never actually read the book,” says Rabbi Rami Shapiro, who once had to persuade a student in his Bible class at Middle Tennessee State University that the saying “this dog won’t hunt” doesn’t appear in the Book of Proverbs."

:rotflmao: