What did you think your career would be in your teens or 20's

[Elessar78]

 

14 hours ago, TheGreatBuzz said:

Actually no.  I'm glad I learned it at an early time in my life.  I keep my hobbies separate now.  My dad told me when I was a kid "unless you can hit a ball or sing a song, you aren't supposed to love your job.  That is why they give you money to do it."   I wish I had listened earlier.  

Hm. Such a limited scope of things. Ever get a chance to read by Grit by Angela Duckworth (MacArthur Genius grant recipient)? It's about her research on persistence and passion. 

 

Edit: one main lesson from the book that the author discovered about doing things you are passionate about is that often times it's not easy or even fun. Think about the swimmers, like Phelps, who gets up at 4 am and jumps into cold pools first thing in the morning. Push themselves until their lungs burn. Watch their diets for decades at a time. It takes a discipline and commitment that many wouldn't characterize as "fun". And a lot of the successful people she interviewed for her research, said that they actually didn't love their chosen field BUT they found out they were good at it. 

 

Your life is experience is your life experience to this point, but don't rule out the possibility to make a buck from something you love. Sometimes there's luck (networking, timing) involved. 

[LadySkinsFan]

I didn't much like managing government proposals, but damn I was really good at it.  One of my clients who I am still close to and knows about my stroke says he wishes I was still managing them. We won a lot of business together. Plus we have the same ethics toward that business. 

 

So my skill set plus I liked managing processes was enjoyable. I even acted as a general contractor when I remodeled my kitchen, so some skills can be utilized across industries.

 

So you never know how your skill set can be utilized in other ways.

[gbear]

I wanted to be a psychologist or in politics.  I came very close to a double major in psychology and econ while an RA.  I had a kid on my hall threaten suicide after his ex started banging the guy in the room next door to him to get even with him.  The school moved him into my room for a week before sending him home.  Then there was another suicide watch in another dorm, and because "I handled the last one so well,"  I was asked to help that kid too.  I realized that work is incredibly draining, and I didn't want to do it for people I don't know/care about.  Yes, there is a lot of irony in thinking that and ending up a foster parent for medically fragile kids. In any event, I dropped the psych major 3 classes short of the double major and partied most of my senior year.  I had enough stats courses between Econ and Psych majors to start a career.  Now I manage a stats project for money with enough time to live and learn.

 

On the politics side, I fear I am too liberal to be an effective politician.  What's more, I would never put my wife and kids through today's politics.  It is still something I dream about, but I am comfortable knowing I help people in my current life.  I never got rich, but that was never a real goal of mine.  I just wanted to make the world a slightly better place.  My wife suggested a plan on our first date, and 17 years later I am happy with the results.

[Elessar78]

4 minutes ago, gbear said:

I wanted to be a psychologist or in politics.  I came very close to a double major in psychology and econ while an RA.  I had a kid on my hall threaten suicide after his ex started banging the guy in the room next door to him to get even with him.  The school moved him into my room for a week before sending him home.  Then there was another suicide watch in another dorm, and because "I handled the last one so well,"  I was asked to help that kid too.  I realized that work is incredibly draining, and I didn't want to do it for people I don't know/care about.  Yes, there is a lot of irony in thinking that and ending up a foster parent for medically fragile kids. In any event, I dropped the psych major 3 classes short of the double major and partied most of my senior year.  I had enough stats courses between Econ and Psych majors to start a career.  Now I manage a stats project for money with enough time to live and learn.

 

On the politics side, I fear I am too liberal to be an effective politician.  What's more, I would never put my wife and kids through today's politics.  It is still something I dream about, but I am comfortable knowing I help people in my current life.  I never got rich, but that was never a real goal of mine.  I just wanted to make the world a slightly better place.  My wife suggested a plan on our first date, and 17 years later I am happy with the results.

wtf, that's a lot to put on a student who is not trained!

 

I think on some subconscious level, many people get exactly the life they plan for. There are certainly people whose life situation is thrust upon them by the randomness of the universe, but I think they are in the minority.

[Burgold]

I wanted to be a playwright. I wanted to see my name on a Broadway playbill.

 

I managed to get one of my plays on Broadway (Okay, 78th and Broadway) and had a few Equity readings. Even had Hal Prince go through one of my scripts and correspond with me for a bit, but I never made the dream. Still, pretty happy with how far I did get. The radio stuff was never a dream. I just fell into that. Having four of my commentaries being chosen best of the year by WAMU (DC NPR) was pretty amazing, working with the Muppet gang on a pair of homage documentaries to Jim Henson was geek heaven, and hosting the Prism was cool as can be. Then, getting a publisher to agree to produce my novel was amazing even though it turned into a bit of a nightmare. Getting Charles De Lint (one of my favorite fantasy authors) to blurb my second book made me skip around the house like a little kid.

 

I have somehow managed to live my dream even though it's as a pretty tiny fish. Over all, I'm happy about that though far from content.

[gbear]

Yes, it was a lot to put on me as an untrained student.  I was miserable with fear and then exhaustion.  Funny thing is the experience has helped me and raised my awareness of mental health as critical for a fulfilling life.

[Elessar78]

20 minutes ago, gbear said:

Yes, it was a lot to put on me as an untrained student.  I was miserable with fear and then exhaustion.  Funny thing is the experience has helped me and raised my awareness of mental health as critical for a fulfilling life.

Amen. My wife is a mental health therapist with a master's degree. She is booked 40 hours a week and 6 months out and only that because 6 months out is all they're allowed to schedule. 

[thebluefood]

I thought for sure I was going to be a reporter. I wanted to work either for the Washington Post or National Public Radio/PBS. I went to school for it and I did it for awhile. Of course, I didn't end up at the Post or a national public broadcasting outlet but I did end up working in that field for a time. It was a learning experience, to say the least. 

 

The newspaper gig I ended up getting damn near drove me to suicide - literally (though thankfully it led me back to therapy and I was diagnosed with depression and ADHD and got treated for it). I learned a lot of lessons about myself, my temperament, and what I actually wanted out of life instead of my career. Namely, it wasn't for me and I knew if I did that for a living, I'd be miserable. I left to press the reset button and discern a possible calling to the clergy.  

 

I did work for a public radio station in rural North Carolina later on and while I did like it better, it wasn't the job I needed to do forever. It was a part-time gig with very little chance of moving up to full-time. I also lived more than an hour away and had to make an early morning commute every day. I made about $12,000/year and had to get a couple side jobs to make ends meet. Meals, doctor's appointments, and engagements with friends were skipped. 

 

I've got a steadier, better paying gig now in PA. I'm back in my part of the country, the Mid-Atlantic, and I'm closer to my family in the D.C. area. It is a blessing but I still don't think this is what I'm meant to do forever. Still mulling over that call to the clergy but finding a spiritual adviser isn't easy - even when you're a member of a parish (priests stay busy - very busy). This certainly isn't where I expected to be approaching my 27th birthday but here I am none the less. 

[LadySkinsFan]

thebluefood, I didn't start my career until I was 33. I earned two associates degrees years apart and had a child. 

 

Some questions for you to ponder.

 

What is it about the clergy that appeals to you?

Can those things be obtained in another field that may have other things to appeal too?

What do you need to do to prepare for a career that appeals?

Can you support yourself and a future family if that's also what you want?

 

I live by the phrase: Luck happens when opportunity meets preparedness.

 

You will find your way! We are all here pulling for your happiness.

[Bang]

In my 20s, i was an electrician for the union. figured that is what i'd do forever. I'm an artistic person, and that was what I wanted to do, but back in those days it was nearly impossible to get started as a commercial artist. So i became an electrician.

Then I got the itch.. i have always wanted to work for myself... and in 1985, i walked into a comic shop and within a month i bought in, and helped run the shop for 7 years... then the market changed and I got out whilei still had a profit...  went back to electrical, then my ex ran off when my son was 2, and that made working construction jobs very difficult.

Had an uncle leave me a small inheritance, not much, but enough to live on for a year so i could go to school. (this was about 2000). Learned web development and graphics and such, and again went into business for myself. 
Did pretty well, but got tired of 7 days a week schedules and inevitably having to chase down deadbeats.

Now I work for a local news service doing graphics and i couldn't be happier. I am doing what I am best at.. i have always been creative, and art is always what I wanted to do. In fact, if you look at my old HS yearbook when it asks for future plans, i wrote "advertising"... which is now a large part of what I do.

 

So, yay for me!

 

~Bang

[thebluefood]

10 minutes ago, LadySkinsFan said:

 

What is it about the clergy that appeals to you?

Can those things be obtained in another field that may have other things to appeal too?

What do you need to do to prepare for a career that appeals?

Can you support yourself and a future family if that's also what you want?

 

I live by the phrase: Luck happens when opportunity meets preparedness.

 

You will find your way! We are all here pulling for your happiness.

 

Thank you for posing these questions. I've been asked them (in some way shape or form) from time to time from a variety of sources (from my original spiritual adviser back in North Carolina to my current, atheist girlfriend) and they provide a good gut check.

 

1.) Plenty of things. I've been a person of faith my whole life, though I've come to the Episcopal Church relatively recently in my life. I'm a pretty good public speaker (at least, I've got a big, loud voice). I'm a pretty good writer, too - especially when given a prompt (as ministers usually give their sermons or homilies from the Gospel) The idea of a vocation that balances rigorous study and active community service appeals to me. Plus I look great in black  

At root, though, I think it's because I believe I'm at my best when I'm a "helper." When I'm in a position to assist, to offer guidance and support, that's where I flourish. Even when I'm in a leadership position, I feel like I do my best work when I "lead from behind" which, in my experience, the most effective clergy people do (vs. being a one man show and developing that "cult of personality" - I've seen that too and it seldom goes well). They help bring out the best in their fellow ministers and the clergy at large. I may not always have the best ideas and I'm certainly not a detailed oriented person by nature (though I can be when circumstances call for it) but when I'm called in from the bullpen to pitch in or offer emotional support for someone having a touch time, that's when I'm at my best. 

 

2.) There are jobs that offer all those things I mentioned and I've also been told I should consider being a social worker or a teacher but I'm not sure that would be a good fit for me due to the bureaucratic nature of it. Plus I'm not the best with kids so I think being a school teacher would drive me up the wall and through the ceiling.  

 

3.) Every diocese has their own specific process of ordination but the process is long, demanding, and usually expensive. In my diocese, there's schooling you have to complete before you even become a "nominee" - which includes a conversation with you bishop and more classes and a possible internship. Then you're interviewed by committees - your bishop, your diocese's ministerial committee, your parish, the dean of your possible seminary. All this is before you do three years at seminary and an internship (Virginia Theological Seminary in Alexandria is the preferred seminary for my diocese). Then there's more meetings and you have to get your training certificate for national programs on things like sexual misconduct and reporting civil abuse (all important but very intense). Then after you've been interviewed again by the bishop, diocesan, and parish committees, you're finally ordained...

 

...as a deacon. 

 

You gotta do that for at least 6 months before you become a candidate for the priesthood and if you make it through all that then, at last, you're ordained as a priest. 

 

We take this **** seriously in the Episcopal Church is what I'm saying.

 

4.) That's the most important and sobering question of all. Once upon a time, a job in the Episcopal Church's clergy netted a pretty hefty salary and they still can depending where you end up or what you're position at the church is. But when you consider how much I might have to take out in student loans and the declining attendance numbers in the Episcopal Church, the outlook isn't too terribly optimistic. I've told folks it wouldn't surprise me if I ended up like Father McKenzie in "Eleanor Rigby" ("writing the words of a sermon that no one will hear"). Priests seem to make enough to at least help support a family and have steady housing. I live a pretty spartan lifestyle, though. That's gotten me through the hardest times of my life. I make more money now than I ever have but I still live the same kind of simple life I had when I had nothing. 

[LadySkinsFan]

Good thinking through theblufood. The campus at the Seminary in Alexandria is beautiful! Have passed by there many times in my lifetime. I used to go with my mom on Meals on Wheels at a nearby church. 

 

You will find your way. It sounds like the process of becoming an Episcopal priest is rigorous to weed out those who aren't dedicated enough to serve.

 

Best wishes for you whatever you decide to pursue.

[thebluefood]

1 minute ago, LadySkinsFan said:

Good thinking through theblufood. The campus at the Seminary in Alexandria is beautiful! Have passed by there many times in my lifetime. I used to go with my mom on Meals on Wheels at a nearby church. 

 

You will find your way. It sounds like the process of becoming an Episcopal priest is rigorous to weed out those who aren't dedicated enough to serve.

 

Best wishes for you whatever you decide to pursue.

Thank you - and the same to you all. Without getting into the ideological weeds, my experiences (as well as the experiences of those around me and my own study about it) have shaped my social, political, and spiritual beliefs more than any book ever could. I've been very blessed but I've also had my ass kicked a little bit. I feel like that can be helpful if I actually make the cut. 

 

For what it's worth, here's a check list for ordination in the Episcopal Church for my diocese. Nearly 30 steps before your bishop gives you the green light. 

 

http://diocesecentralpa.s3.amazonaws.com/pdf/ordinationpriestprocess.pdf

[Kosher Ham]

I just hope he doesn't become Don "Magic" Juan. 

[DCSaints_fan]

I thought I would be some type of scientist or engineer.  Currently a software developer, so pretty close. 

[thebluefood]

1 minute ago, Kosher Ham said:

I just hope he doesn't become Don "Magic" Juan. 

I don't think my femme colleagues, especially our former presiding bishop/church leader, would appreciate that too much.

 

Besides, I couldn't pull off the flashy clothes. I think the simple cassock and collar will do (like I said - I look good in black  )

[Kosher Ham]

20 hours ago, Cooked Crack said:

Pornstar.

 

Been shooting these vids but still not a star yet.

 

20 hours ago, abdcskins said:

I never knew what I wanted to be and still don't 20 years later 

 

I guess I wanted to be a journalist.  That never materialized so I became a social worker.  Now I'm in between jobs and am not really sure what I want to pursue.  

 

Cooked, it's about the angles. 

 

abdc, you just need a job. Someone is hiring. 

 

20 hours ago, nonniey said:

I guess I'm an anomaly I thought I'd have a military career when I was a child and ended up being career soldier. 

 

That is awesome. Thank you for your service. My family is predominately military or government...I was the first to step out of that field. 

 

19 hours ago, Sacks 'n' Stuff said:

Professional football player. I forget about what age I realized my dad had been right all along and that I actually sucked. I think it was like 10. Now my dream is that Kosher Ham, our dog, and I will travel around the country in a van solving mysteries.

 

I've been around the world and I,I,I, found my baby, she's amazing.  Now these mysteries... I've only figured out a few. 

 

18 hours ago, Renegade7 said:

Not sure how I feel about this.  I've had days in my last two jobs where I was having so much fun that I would've done it for free (but that would be stupid).  Think that's the difference between a job and a career, a paycheck versus working in field that you're passionate about.

 

Passion will find you happiness. I really believe that. I feel that architecture was a dream. My passion is to live life and smile everyday. I try to make others smile or at least reflect on reasons they should. 

[Forehead]

For me, it was baseball.  I was a pretty good pitcher in high school, and got a few mid-level accolades.  I'm relatively tall and had the "prototypical frame" of a pitcher, as well as a fastball that could touch 80 mph and a pretty solid curveball.  My issue was, like many teenagers, I lacked any sort of direction or focus.  Everything above, the fastball, etc. was natural, I never lifted a single weight and didn't do any running unless I was forced to.  Attended a few winter camps to get in shape for the HS season, but that was about it.  Ice and heat were for *******, I swallowed more Aleve than a teenager should (a lot of guys on the team did) and soldiered on.  I'm not one to live in the past, but that's probably the one thing I'd do over, start a weight regimen and actually run, etc. when I was 13 or 14.  I'm curious, with a few years of actual training, if I could have gotten my fastball over 90, which would have likely attracted scouts.  Would I have made it...who knows.  Probably not, the odds are long, but I would have given myself a better shot.  20/20 hindsight.

 

Not to mention, my lack of care for my arm has led to some decent shoulder pains later in life; there's probably a surgery sometime in my future.

 

I definitely had no idea what I was going to do while I was in college.  Got a business degree mostly because it seemed more marketable in general than anthropology, history, or a bunch of other random majors people at college were focusing on.

 

Bounced around government contracting for a few years, got my MBA going to school at night while working.  Wound up getting a government position doing work I didn't know existed, which I'm still doing to this day.  Also learned to have an actual work ethic while in college, so my career has gone very well in a short time.  I'm pretty happy where I am.

 

If money weren't an issue, I wouldn't mind teaching, I enjoy working with kids, but I'm not sure I could do it.  I'd need to figure out what the sweet spot age is where they're still eager to learn and have a somewhat healthy fear of the teacher, but aren't crazy kindergartners.  Maybe 3rd grade?  The other issue, as some of you know here, is I sometimes lack patience or a filter.  I know a lot of parents have taken to blaming teachers for their kids failures/misbehavior, and I'm pretty sure "Why don't you fix your little ****bag, they aren't that special?" probably won't play well in parent-teacher conferences.

[Kosher Ham]

I am accurate with a pitch, I have hand speed , but not throwing speed. 

 

I feel like the guy that sang... I wish I was a little bit taller. Something like that. 

[Corcaigh]

As a teen I always aspired to, and knew I would become, a CMO - Chief Misery Officer.

 

In truth, I was a physics and computer nerd in high school. Did some post grad research in electrical engineering, but realized that the research environment wasn't for me.

 

I admit to being an anti-social asshole but I was probably 1 on a scale of 10 compared to my colleagues in that world

 

So I escaped to the software industry where things are much better.

[Riggo-toni]

I wanted to be Salma Hayek's personal bikini waxer.

[abdcskins]

47 minutes ago, Kosher Ham said:

abdc, you just need a job. Someone is hiring. 

 

I'll find one. I'm not gonna just take some boring job though, I want something I'll enjoy.

[Elessar78]

7 minutes ago, Riggo-toni said:

I wanted to be Salma Hayek's personal bikini waxer.

Do you need a one-handed assistant?

[Dont Taze Me Bro]

Civil engineer, working for a great firm and banking 200K/yr.  In community college, the dean of mechanical engineering at UNCC visited our school, his pitch for going mechanical sounded great.  Decided on going to UNCC for Mechanical engineering and got my BSME.  Interviewed for some jobs, actually turned one down which sounded shady at the time.  They wanted me to draft for them for 3-5 years at 30K/yr until their new plant was built, then stated they would promote me to an engineer (they wanted new engineering grads as drafters, then would promote and back-fill with actual drafters).  Problem was, I was going to make more money managing a grocery store.

 

That was back in 1998........One of my friends husband's actually worked there (so the plant did get built) and told me I would be sitting at 150+K a year and doing basically nothing.  

 

I ended up in healthcare reimbursement.  I love my job, vacation and benefits are great, I get to work from home and for what my pay is (which is good - but not **** you money good) I can't beat it.  Another thing about switching to mechanical, had I gone civil, my wife's uncle told her that he could have set me up with a nice paying job as he was a VP at a civil engineering firm.  

 

Oh well, that ship has long sailed.  Gonna ride out this current job until I retire or they fire me.

 

Edit:  should also add computer science, it was that or civil engineering, but CS hadn't blown up yet back then, so I went engineering.

[pjfootballer]

Went to college and studied Broadcasting/Journalism. Wanted to be a sports broadcaster or writer. 

 

Long story short, I met Glenn Brenner while in high school. Was supposed to go see him after college, but he passed away.  Tried to get into the field, but with no luck.

 

I've just worked “jobs”. I don’t call what I do a career. Pays the bills and will give me a retirement. 

 

Did I mention I hate my life?