ksl.com: Cheating website Ashley Madison hacked, personal info posted

[Riggo-toni]

I bet Christian Slater was behind it.

[Xameil]

I bet Christian Slater was behind it.

My bet is Matthew Broderick trying to play a game of global thermonuclear war...

[Momma There Goes That Man]

People that would be on here are definitely scumbags and I don't feel sorry for them if they are cheating on their spouse.

There are a lot of lives being ruined right now though and people are going to be very angry. I would be pretty afraid if I were one of these hackers right now.

Even Kevin Bacon and his task force of the worlds most inept FBI agents were able to track down and locate the superman of hackers Theo in season 3 of The Following.

Their time will come too.

[The Evil Genius]

I'd be more pissed with the hacked credit card info and the impact that might have on credit card fraud (and it's impact on you, the card holder). 

 

It's not your card..but it might be your company's card (Amex, Visa, MC)..and they will get it back somehow (from all the users, eventually via higher interest rates and or fees).

[Zguy28]

Nothing will happen to them. Do you really want to invite other groups like Anonymous to rally around against you? I wouldn't. It will just make it worse. Of course, that might not be enough deterrent to a CEO of a multinational corporation who could hire a death squad to hunt them down.

[ZRagone]

We signed people up for Chick tracts.   That was cruel.

 

You're horrible....

 

I don't want to be Elfstar anymore! I want to be Debbie!

[TMK9973]

This thread is very one sided because who will take the position of supporting cheaters...

But there is a lot of holier then thou so I'll play devils advocate.

1 - You cant be for privacy and against hacking - except for this because you dont like cheaters.  The hack is morally wrong and a crime.

2 - Everyone seems to put this in terms they like. THe bad guys are the current cheaters exposed. The only victims are the innocent families.  Except we dont live in a world of black and white.

What about those that already were caught or confessed - THe hack goes back to 2007! What about those that either have or were currently working it out with their SO. What was a private thing that a couple was working thru - is now exposed for extended family, neighbors, and strangers to judge and view.

What about couples that were in it together.  I wont judge someones else relationship - but for those couples that had decided that this worked for them and wanted to keep it private -who are we to judge? Let alone now their friends, families, and possibile kids that find out. 

3- What about the people that were tempted but never followed thru?

 

As for the posters that said "Its all guys" and "Its a prostitution ring".  Read up on it.  The reason it is mostly guys is because on AM only guys paid.  So while some women might have used their real names and email address - MOST are gonna be fake and generic. the real names are those that had to pay and use their Credit cards.

 

Yeah - I saw the list.  I saw some names i knew.  Only 1 was a friend -And my only communication to him was "Im sorry is out there. If you need a friend or someone to talk to let me know".  Other then that - The only thing I do know is I dont know any of their stories.  

[Mr. Sinister]

3- What about the people that were tempted but never followed thru?

Quite a leap from thinking about cheating, to cheating. Same can be said for a lot of unsavory acts that are only given brief thought, but never acted upon.

Not being judgmental is just another excuse thrown out there for them to land on when they are in freefall.

"Don't be judgmental"

"Its none of your business" etc etc. All BS excuses

[Lombardi's_kid_brother]

I have a policy that I never ever criticize anyone as a parent for the simple reason: You never know. You don't know what's going on in someone's home.

 

And, yes, the Josh Duggar story is "fun" in a car crash way because of the hypocrisy of the person involved. And I'm sure that the vast majority of the dudes on that list are "cheating scumbags."

 

But we don't know. We don't know what sort of arrangement they have with their wives. We don't know what their marriages are like. We don't know what their family situation is like.

 

So for anyone to be exposed like this is just wrong.

 

Like, are fathers and mothers having to explain to their teenage kids right now that "It's okay because Mommy and Daddy are swingers?" Are people going to have to explain to their parents what an open marriage is?

 

This just strikes me as the politics of personal destruction without the politics. It's personal destruction just for the sake of it.

Quite a leap from thinking about cheating, to cheating. Same can be said for a lot of unsavory acts that are only given brief thought, but never acted upon.

Not being judgmental is just another excuse thrown out there for them to land on when they are in freefall.

"Don't be judgmental"

"Its none of your business" etc etc. All BS excuses

 

Who are we judging though?

 

Remember that Gawker story last month that resulted in everyone getting fired? The story of the person know one ever heard of getting a male escort?

 

I think we all agreed that there was no newsworthiness to that story, particularly since they never revealed the leaker's name.

 

It was a grenade thrown into a family's lives for no good reason.

 

Isn't this exactly the same?

[tshile]

1 - You cant be for privacy and against hacking - except for this because you dont like cheaters.  The hack is morally wrong and a crime.

Yeah but no one's really arguing that. I'm sure some are, but the vast majority are not implying nothing illegal was done.

We're simplying saying the (primary) victims of the crime aren't sympathetic figures. In fact, many are cheering for this harm being done to them for a variety of reasons.

Hard to care about someone who couldn't be bothered to not cheat on their family. (Yeah, if you have kids, you're not just cheating on your spouse, your kids get dragged into the mess too)

I care a lot about privacy. This situation will provide all of zero movement on the privacy front. I gave up the fight not too long ago. Not enough people *actual* care about privacy for it to be an issue like it is in Europe. We've lost that fight. It is what it is.

2 - Everyone seems to put this in terms they like. THe bad guys are the current cheaters exposed. The only victims are the innocent families.  Except we dont live in a world of black and white.

What about those that already were caught or confessed - THe hack goes back to 2007! What about those that either have or were currently working it out with their SO. What was a private thing that a couple was working thru - is now exposed for extended family, neighbors, and strangers to judge and view.

What about couples that were in it together.  I wont judge someones else relationship - but for those couples that had decided that this worked for them and wanted to keep it private -who are we to judge? Let alone now their friends, families, and possibile kids that find out.

You're right, there are people that are reliving a situation that's made more embarrassing. Doesn't change anything for me, I feel bad for the families but the cheater can go through it all over again as far as I care.

Judging is a critical part of survival. The highest position in the country, from which no one can remove you but yourself, is a judge. Spare me the 'who are you to judge' stuff. We all judge, it's how we make it through life. If you don't like how you're being judged then you need to ask yourself whether you care about the opinion of those who are judging you, and if you do maybe you should change your behavior...

3- What about the people that were tempted but never followed thru?

So tempted they created an account and then paid money?

Hard to feel bad for someone who so foolishly puts themselves in this position.

The site was solely dedicated to helping a married person find someone to have a discrete affair with. Look but didn't touch? Yeah, right.

[tshile]

Who are we judging though?

People who used their real names and contact information to sign up for a service dedicated to making it easier to have an affair.

 

Additionally: People who used their government (including military) email address to do so.

 

I mean I'm also judging POUNDITNRUN@yahoo.com for his (her?) awesome email address and smarts to use a gift card with no name instead of a credit card, but for totally different reasons.

 

We don't know what kind of arrangements they had with their wives? Doesn't sound like someone who would use this service...

[Mr. Sinister]

I have a policy that I never ever criticize anyone as a parent for the simple reason: You never know. You don't know what's going on in someone's home.

And, yes, the Josh Duggar story is "fun" in a car crash way because of the hypocrisy of the person involved. And I'm sure that the vast majority of the dudes on that list are "cheating scumbags."

But we don't know. We don't know what sort of arrangement they have with their wives. We don't know what their marriages are like. We don't know what their family situation is like.

So for anyone to be exposed like this is just wrong.

Like, are fathers and mothers having to explain to their teenage kids right now that "It's okay because Mommy and Daddy are swingers?" Are people going to have to explain to their parents what an open marriage is?

This just strikes me as the politics of personal destruction without the politics. It's personal destruction just for the sake of it.

Who are we judging though?

Remember that Gawker story last month that resulted in everyone getting fired? The story of the person know one ever heard of getting a male escort?

I think we all agreed that there was no newsworthiness to that story, particularly since they never revealed the leaker's name.

It was a grenade thrown into a family's lives for no good reason.

Isn't this exactly the same?

Yeah, it is. And its sad. Maybe thats what the kids thenselves will he saying decades from now..."How different would my life be if it had remained a secret. Unfortunately, thats the problem with secrets, especially secrets of that variety. They just have a way of getting out, one way or another. I'm not fond of hackers, and this will indeed ruin lives, and possibly lead to deaths. Who knows

Thats a choice that people themselves have to make when they roll that cosmic dice with their lives, and everyone connected to it. Is some ass worth possibly destroying everything you've worked so hard to attain? Judging by the staggering amount of people that do it, apparently it is.

[TMK9973]

Yeah but no one's really arguing that. I'm sure some are, but the vast majority are not implying nothing illegal was done.

We're simplying saying the (primary) victims of the crime aren't sympathetic figures. In fact, many are cheering for this harm being done to them for a variety of reasons.

Hard to care about someone who couldn't be bothered to not cheat on their family. (Yeah, if you have kids, you're not just cheating on your spouse, your kids get dragged into the mess too)

I care a lot about privacy. This situation will provide all of zero movement on the privacy front. I gave up the fight not too long ago. Not enough people *actual* care about privacy for it to be an issue like it is in Europe. We've lost that fight. It is what it is.

You're right, there are people that are reliving a situation that's made more embarrassing. Doesn't change anything for me, I feel bad for the families but the cheater can go through it all over again as far as I care.

Judging is a critical part of survival. The highest position in the country, from which no one can remove you but yourself, is a judge. Spare me the 'who are you to judge' stuff. We all judge, it's how we make it through life. If you don't like how you're being judged then you need to ask yourself whether you care about the opinion of those who are judging you, and if you do maybe you should change your behavior...

So tempted they created an account and then paid money?

Hard to feel bad for someone who so foolishly puts themselves in this position.

The site was solely dedicated to helping a married person find someone to have a discrete affair with. Look but didn't touch? Yeah, right.

 

Hard to feel bad for someone who so foolishly puts themselves in this position.

The site was solely dedicated to helping a married person find someone to have a discrete affair with. Look but didn't touch? Yeah, right.

 

Talk to anyone who has used online dating (Non cheating - legit dating sites. Match, Tinder, OkCupid).  MANY people sign up for accounts, talk to people, then decide they don't want to meet someone online and drop it.

Why do you think this is different.  

Its hard for you to picture that someone is in a bad marriage, considers cheating, finds the website and signs up and exchanges message, but then when it comes time to face to face meeting they decide not to?

 

Not only do i think it happens, I bet it happens A LOT.  

[tshile]

Also, keep in mind, this started as a threat against the company for their outright lies and deceit to their customers.

 

They refused to acknowledge that, and so the threats came through.

 

I'm not entirely sure what that changes, but the company has some responsibility in this as well. This didn't start out as some crusade to expose people who cheat on their spouse.

 

(I have no idea if that changes anything for me, so if it doesn't for you that's OK Just pointing it out...)

[Lombardi's_kid_brother]

Also, keep in mind, this started as a threat against the company for their outright lies and deceit to their customers.

 

They refused to acknowledge that, and so the threats came through.

 

I'm not entirely sure what that changes, but the company has some responsibility in this as well. This didn't start out as some crusade to expose people who cheat on their spouse.

 

(I have no idea if that changes anything for me, so if it doesn't for you that's OK Just pointing it out...)

 

No, Ashley Madison needs to be sued back the stone age for lying about deleting accounts and then not protecting that information.

[tshile]

Talk to anyone who has used online dating (Non cheating - legit dating sites. Match, Tinder, OkCupid).  MANY people sign up for accounts, talk to people, then decide they don't want to meet someone online and drop it.

Why do you think this is different.  

Its hard for you to picture that someone is in a bad marriage, considers cheating, finds the website and signs up and exchanges message, but then when it comes time to face to face meeting they decide not to?

 

Not only do i think it happens, I bet it happens A LOT.  

 

But we're not talking about a dating site... we're talking about a site dedicated SOLELY to facilitating affairs.

 

You're talking about the curious person who's grown out of the bar/party scene (or never liked it to begin with) without ever finding someone to spend the rest of their life wife, turning to a new technology to try to fix that. You're talking about social stigmas, in a society that is very slow (and random) in how it changes.

 

We're talking about an age old problem of infidelity and people using a service to further that.

 

In your example at the end, bad marriage, I don't view cheating as a solution in any way to a bad marriage. You'll have to look to someone else for sympathy on that one.

No, Ashley Madison needs to be sued back the stone age for lying about deleting accounts and then not protecting that information.

No disagreement there.

 

I was commenting earlier today to someone... I don't understand why the founder is out there giving statements and commenting... That idiot should have liquidated and fled ASAP. Does he not see what's coming down the pipe here?

 

To which the other person responded that class actions are already being filed.

 

They should be sued, THEY are the reason for this. The rest of the side show is just amusing to watch (outside of what it does to the families, that does suck )

[Lombardi's_kid_brother]

 

In your example at the end, bad marriage, I don't view cheating as a solution in any way to a bad marriage. You'll have to look to someone else for sympathy on that one.

 

I guess the fundamental question here is: Should cheaters - regardless of their motives - be publicly shamed?

[tshile]

I guess the fundamental question here is: Should cheaters - regardless of their motives - be publicly shamed?

 

Yes.

 

But I'd prefer, in this case, if we had left out:

Swingers or other arrangements (I'd argue that's not cheating...)

People who have already gone over this with their spouses.

 

In those two situations the ONLY outcome of something like this is needless embarrassment.

 

If there was a way to just notify the spouses and government/military then I'd be for that, but that wasn't going to happen.

 

Of course... I come from the perspective that if my wife was cheating on me I'd prefer I know. I'd rather deal with those consequences than just be blind to the fact that my wife is having sex with other people whenever she wants.  I'm sure there's plenty that would rather not know, but I have a hard time sympathizing with them too because I just don't do not understand that mentality (which I recognize is my issue, not theirs, whatever that's worth.)

[Lombardi's_kid_brother]

Yes.

 

 

 

Wow. I just can't get behind that.

 

Of course... I come from the perspective that if my wife was cheating on me I'd prefer I know. I'd rather deal with those consequences than just be blind to the fact that my wife is having sex with other people whenever she wants.  I'm sure there's plenty that would rather not know, but I have a hard time sympathizing with them too because I just don't do not understand that mentality (which I recognize is my issue, not theirs, whatever that's worth.)

 

Wanting to know or not wanting to know is your right.

 

But I guess my question is, if your wife was cheating, would you want EVERYONE to know?

[tshile]

Wow. I just can't get behind that.

 

And that's OK

 

Cheating is high up on my list of terrible things. It just is. I don't have any experience with it, still on my first marriage and my parents are still married.

 

But I've seen others go through it. I've seen how it negatively affects them. I've seen the people that do cheat. I don't like them, I don't like what they do to the ones they claim they love, and I certainly cannot stand their bull**** excuses and false declarations about how they've changed and won't do it again.

 

If you're unhappy, or unsatisfied, or whatever with your marriage and family there's a hell of a lot of ways to go about fixing or changing that and finding someone else to have sex with, without permission from your spouse, is just not one of them. Pretending that's some sort of excuse is ridiculous to me.

[Lombardi's_kid_brother]

And that's OK

 

Cheating is high up on my list of terrible things. It just is. I don't have any experience with it, still on my first marriage and my parents are still married.

 

But I've seen others go through it. I've seen how it negatively affects them. I've seen the people that do cheat. I don't like them, I don't like what they do to the ones they claim they love, and I certainly cannot stand their bull**** excuses and false declarations about how they've changed and won't do it again.

 

If you're unhappy, or unsatisfied, or whatever with your marriage and family there's a hell of a lot of ways to go about fixing or changing that and finding someone else to have sex with, without permission from your spouse, is just not one of them. Pretending that's some sort of excuse is ridiculous to me.

 

See, I think I know of more relationships where cheating occurred, the reasons were addressed, forgiveness, and the couple moved on than situations where cheating occurred and there was an immediate split.

 

But I tend to hang with godless multi-culturalist libertines so your mileage my vary.

[TMK9973]

The argument of do bad relationships cause adulty or does adulty cause bad relationships is a bigger one then this thread.  My only point is that simply saying every name on this list deserves to be outed is a major oversimplification.

 

I think LKB had a great point - if your SO cheated you would want to know and dont understand those that dont - but would you also want EVERYONE else to know as well? 

[tshile]

See, I think I know of more relationships where cheating occurred, the reasons were addressed, forgiveness, and the couple moved on than situations where cheating occurred and there was an immediate split.

 

But I tend to hang with godless multi-culturalist libertines so your mileage my vary.

 

And maybe that's what guides me, I don't have a lot of those within my circle of family and friends.

 

I have the stories where the wife ran off with the ex for a hook up, told the young kid for some dumb **** reason and the kid told the dad because... it's a ****ing kid and they didn't know what to do. So then the wife left the entire family bankrupt and now wants to pretend like she did nothing wrong, a decade later. (yeah, that's a lot longer story than we have time for in this thread)

 

Or where the kids were in middle school and had to up and move, leaving everything they knew behind, because the dad couldn't help but hook up with the young, new receptionist so the mom took the kids back to where she could actually be supported.

 

And in some cases, I feel comfortable looking at some people I know and realizing that the problems they're having as adults go back to some emotional scars (or whatever Jumbo would call them, this is far from my field) that were never addressed because while the parents were busy one-upping each other the kids were left to fend for themselves (emotionally.)

 

The worst... the one that makes me want to stand up and smash my desk in half, even as I type this... are the military people that go over seas and risk their lives for us only to come home and find out their wife has been cheating on them because... i guess a 6 month deployment was just too long and people get lonely, you know?

 

Too boot she left him bankrupt. He made tons of money being deployed over seas for years... even left the military to join one of these contracting outfits for increased pay. Not only did she cheat on him, but she spent all his money too.

 

So the whole thing has an incredibly nasty taste in my mouth.

 

I'm sure if majority of my stories were like yours, where fences were mended and meaningful relationships were forged out of it, I'd have a completely different view.

 

Unfortunately that's just not the way things went for my friends/family.

[Momma There Goes That Man]

I'm sure there are a lot of single guys on the list that signed up just because it seemed like an easy way to get some action. Who knows or cares if they're really married. It's a hookup site. A million guys would want to signup married or not.

So I doubt everyone on that list is a cheater. If that means anything.

[PokerPacker]

I'm sure there are a lot of single guys on the list that signed up just because it seemed like an easy way to get some action. Who knows or cares if they're really married. It's a hookup site. A million guys would want to signup married or not.

So I doubt everyone on that list is a cheater. If that means anything.

On that note, how many were single when they signed up and are now married?