PokerPacker Posted December 27, 2022 Share Posted December 27, 2022 22 minutes ago, Jabbyrwock said: How to guide: Step 1: Realize people don't think about you. Step 2: Drink. I took a slightly different approach: Step 1: People are stupid and therefore whatever they think about me is irrelevant Step 2: Drink 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jabbyrwock Posted December 27, 2022 Share Posted December 27, 2022 1 minute ago, PokerPacker said: I took a slightly different approach: Step 1: People are stupid and therefore whatever they think about me is irrelevant Step 2: Drink As long as you get to step 2. Bottoms up :). 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PokerPacker Posted December 27, 2022 Share Posted December 27, 2022 14 minutes ago, Jabbyrwock said: As long as you get to step 2. Bottoms up :). Scotch, neat. Please and thank you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riggo-toni Posted December 27, 2022 Share Posted December 27, 2022 Well I am fairly confident my body fat <15% So I got that going for me, which is nice... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CousinsCowgirl84 Posted December 27, 2022 Share Posted December 27, 2022 (edited) 3 hours ago, China said: Glad I’m not the only one who thought men getting their eggs shook and cows milked by a farmer was a strange status symbol… Edited December 27, 2022 by CousinsCowgirl84 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Destino Posted December 27, 2022 Share Posted December 27, 2022 I can see the first three being a thing. Good shape and stable marriage are good things, and who would trust a person that doesn’t read? It kind of goes off the rails after that. What man has his chest out talking about homeschooling his kids? That’s not a thing. No one is out on these streets like “that’s Jim, he homeschools so he’s a cool.” Nope. Saying you homeschool your kids has to be followed up with assurances that you aren’t crazy and you’re doing it for the right reasons. Relationship with a farmer? I’ve never met an actual farmer. I’m not entirely convinced they exist as presented in rural mythology. They’re all corporations now. complete control over your time and homeschooling are mutually exclusive. Also being married and complete control of your time is like dividing by zero. Absurd. 3 4 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jabbyrwock Posted December 27, 2022 Share Posted December 27, 2022 5 minutes ago, Destino said: What man has his chest out talking about homeschooling his kids? I home school my kid. And he goes to public school. They used to call that "parenting". 6 minutes ago, Destino said: Also being married and complete control of your time is like dividing by zero. Absurd. Unless you also have zero free time before the wife gets a-hold of it, because then you are dividing zero by zero. Of course, in the limit of 0/0 you apply Le'Hospital's rule which states: make more time for the wife or you'll end up in le hospital. 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Wiggles Posted December 27, 2022 Share Posted December 27, 2022 (edited) 5 hours ago, Destino said: I’ve never met an actual farmer. I'd imagine that's pretty common for most folk since less than 2% of Americans are farmers. Of that 2% tho less than 15% are female. Those odds are terrible. That's like <650k ladies to choose from. 🤓 Edited December 28, 2022 by Captain Wiggles 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PleaseBlitz Posted December 27, 2022 Share Posted December 27, 2022 1 hour ago, Destino said: I can see the first three being a thing. Good shape and stable marriage are good things, and who would trust a person that doesn’t read? It kind of goes off the rails after that. The tweet was carefully crafted so the first 3 made you think, “okay, this is a reasonable person” but the next 3 were the crazy ones he was really trying to get over on everyone after he tricked them into thinking he was reasonable. He might have gotten away with it if it was 5 reasonable ones (“The respect of your coworkers”) and one crazy one hidden in between the normal ones. 3 and 3 is a bridge too far. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PokerPacker Posted December 28, 2022 Share Posted December 28, 2022 1 hour ago, Jabbyrwock said: I home school my kid. And he goes to public school. They used to call that "parenting". Unless you also have zero free time before the wife gets a-hold of it, because then you are dividing zero by zero. Of course, in the limit of 0/0 you apply Le'Hospital's rule which states: make more time for the wife or you'll end up in le hospital. It's a math joke. I get jokes and math. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corcaigh Posted December 28, 2022 Share Posted December 28, 2022 10 hours ago, PleaseBlitz said: I look down on people who homeschool. Maybe his kids are trans and he doesn’t feel they are safe in school Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corcaigh Posted December 28, 2022 Share Posted December 28, 2022 (edited) The world would be a much better place if all these assholes on Twitter went back to writing moronic letters on their stupid opinions to the local paper. Who gives a **** what these uninteresting and unfunny people think? Platforms like Twitter, Medium and others encourage these no-talent, unoriginal and uninteresting people to ‘create content’ in the belief that they will get better the more they write. No, you talentless ****s just shut the hell up and do drugs or drink heavily or something that might make you more interesting. Edited December 28, 2022 by Corcaigh 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jabbyrwock Posted December 28, 2022 Share Posted December 28, 2022 4 hours ago, Captain Wiggles said: Of that 2% tho less than 15% are female. Those odds are terrible. That's like >650k ladies to choose from. 🤓 Welp...its a dirty job but someone has ta... ...nope. Nevermind. All yours wiggles. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corcaigh Posted December 28, 2022 Share Posted December 28, 2022 By a stable marriage he means one consummated with a horse. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlvinWaltonIsMyBoy Posted December 28, 2022 Share Posted December 28, 2022 14 hours ago, PleaseBlitz said: You know who has complete control over their time? Retirees and the unemployed. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hersh Posted December 28, 2022 Share Posted December 28, 2022 17 hours ago, Cooked Crack said: I'm 0/6 so far. Anyone know any farmers they can link me to? 2 and 4 are not compatible with 6. Dude either doesn't have kids or doesn't give a **** about his family. 8 hours ago, Destino said: What man has his chest out talking about homeschooling his kids? That’s not a thing. No one is out on these streets like “that’s Jim, he homeschools so he’s a cool.” Nope. Saying you homeschool your kids has to be followed up with assurances that you aren’t crazy and you’re doing it for the right reasons. 100% truth spoken here and people often say why without being asked why. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corcaigh Posted December 28, 2022 Share Posted December 28, 2022 14 hours ago, Destino said: What man has his chest out talking about homeschooling his kids? That’s not a thing. No one is out on these streets like “that’s Jim, he homeschools so he’s a cool.” Nope. Saying you homeschool your kids has to be followed up with assurances that you aren’t crazy and you’re doing it for the right reasons. Someone who homeschools their kids is like someone who does their own dentistry at home. You gotta wonder if they have the qualifications. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dfitzo53 Posted December 28, 2022 Share Posted December 28, 2022 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cooked Crack Posted January 26, 2023 Author Share Posted January 26, 2023 I'm already out at #1. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Wiggles Posted January 26, 2023 Share Posted January 26, 2023 Cold showers are for psychopaths. 🤷♂️ 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted January 26, 2023 Share Posted January 26, 2023 3 minutes ago, Captain Wiggles said: Cold showers are for psychopaths. 🤷♂️ What I Learned Taking Cold Showers for an Whole Year 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TradeTheBeal! Posted January 26, 2023 Share Posted January 26, 2023 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skinsmarydu Posted January 27, 2023 Share Posted January 27, 2023 Y'all so funny. I'm a good girl who got it right. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PleaseBlitz Posted January 27, 2023 Share Posted January 27, 2023 1 hour ago, Cooked Crack said: I'm already out at #1. 16 year old me during wrestling season hits 12 of 13 of these. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cooked Crack Posted January 27, 2023 Author Share Posted January 27, 2023 1 minute ago, PleaseBlitz said: 16 year old me during wrestling season hits 12 of 13 of these. No meditation, eh. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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