Spaceman Spiff Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 Having dinner with my cousin last night and he pulled out his new favorite expression "Shut your ****-washer". I couldn't stop laughing....it takes shut your pie-hole to a whole new level. It's always fun to tell someone to "go kick rocks" too. Anyway, lets all enhance our vernaculars and share. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Springfield Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 I'm a big fan of the term douchebag... or just douche. It has a real nice ring to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mel25 Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 "ya mama" has to be my all time favorite. so simple, yet so effective. and it works no matter how you say it: ya mama, your mother, ya mammy. when all else fails, i say "ya mama." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Sassy Molassy Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 My favorite one to say to my white friends, when we're talking **** to each other, is, "At least I'm not white.". It makes no sense and always ends the conversation because they always respond with, "What?". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlitzFiftySix Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 I bought my wife a half dozen roses as one of her several birthday presents last week and had our 4 year old son walk into her office several feet in front of me to deliver them to her personally. Her reaction.... "A half dozen?", "Where are the other half dozen". To which I quickly replied...... "Well, your only half the wife you should be". "Get your act together and the rest will follow". I'm quite proud of myself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. S Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 "ya mama" has to be my all time favorite. so simple, yet so effective. and it works no matter how you say it: ya mama, your mother, ya mammy. when all else fails, i say "ya mama." backfired on me once. Said that to my freshman year roommate early in the year. Didn't realize at the time his mom died of cancer when he was a freshman in high school. I just like a simple "says you", or "you would". Most people seem to get a kick out of it, or are shocked at the simplicity of it. I'll sometimes go even further childish and say "cause you smell funny" or "you dress funny". There is always the classic "cause you touch yourself at night." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teller Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 My favorite one to say to my white friends, when we're talking **** to each other, is, "At least I'm not white.". It makes no sense and always ends the conversation because they always respond with, "What?". So you picked the wrong doll? :paranoid: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SkinsGuy Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 'I know you are, but what am I?' Actually, I never use that, but it is one I thought of. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mel25 Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 backfired on me once. Said that to my freshman year roommate early in the year. Didn't realize at the time his mom died of cancer when he was a freshman in high school. I just like a simple "says you", or "you would". Most people seem to get a kick out of it, or are shocked at the simplicity of it. I'll sometimes go even further childish and say "cause you smell funny" or "you dress funny". There is always the classic "cause you touch yourself at night." you know what, i shoulda said in my first post that i don't use it all the time with just anybody, cause it backfied on me twice. after the second time i figured that i should know a little bit of background info before i say it. i do say it a lot of the time with a lot of people. also, "deez n**z" is always a good one. and i just want you to know that i will be usin "cause you touch yourself at night." as i'm typin this email, i'm realizin that i'm nowhere near as mature as i thought i was before i opened this thread. oh one more, "that's what she said" cracks me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spaceman Spiff Posted April 13, 2008 Author Share Posted April 13, 2008 you know what, i shoulda said in my first post that i don't use it all the time with just anybody, cause it backfied on me twice. after the second time i figured that i should know a little bit of background info before i say it. i do say it a lot of the time with a lot of people. also, "deez n**z" is always a good one. and i just want you to know that i will be usin "cause you touch yourself at night." as i'm typin this email, i'm realizin that i'm nowhere near as mature as i thought i was before i opened this thread. oh one more, "that's what she said" cracks me. Ahhhh, Deez Nutz! "Have you met my friend, Deez?" What a great line. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Sassy Molassy Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 So you picked the wrong doll? :paranoid: hahahaha, good one ... racist. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mel25 Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 Ahhhh, Deez Nutz!"Have you met my friend, Deez?" What a great line. lol who you tellin? me and my boys went through a phase (and return to it quite frequently) where you couldn't say anything without somebody makin some type of "deez" reference. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teller Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 hahahaha, good one ... racist. Nuttin but love bud. See you at the DDP. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rdskn4Lyf21 Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 At work when we transfer phone calls to each other, we are stuck on: "Joe's on the line for you." "Joe who?" "Joe mama!" Followed by the usual snickering. I guess that's what you get when the majority of us are 25-30 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AllAboutSkins08 Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 i always like "that's what she said." it's best when it's said after things that don't make sense as sexual innuendos Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darth Tater Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 "I double-dog dare you!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PokerPacker Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 "yeah, well **** you!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rumrunner6900 Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 **** washer? I always say, "Shut your **** holster"! And my other favorite: "If I wanted your lip, I'd pry it off my zipper." Doesnt make too much sense, but funny nonetheless! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PCS Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 If someone is a bit out there with an opinion or something, I've been known to tell them "Go ahead and live in that wonderland Alice. And while you're at it, tell that big rabbit we said hello." Usually accompanied with Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dcnativenerd Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 I was shooting the breeze with a friend of mine one day, and when we do that, we shoot harmless (though very rough) insults at each other. She shot a really good one at me, and all I could think of was "Way to win the jerk contest, jerk!" She would not stop laughing at that. That was about a month ago, and if I mention it now, she'll still laugh like a crazy woman. Brilliant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
THUNDERDOME Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 This one liner is hilarious cause he did it backwards :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redskinss Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 when i was younger my friends and I were camping across the river from one of the most prestigous preparatory schools in the country, and that is when i heard one of the fastest and best comebacks ever. some of the students were on the other side of the river probably smoking pot or something when one of them said " hey tomboy faggot campers". my friend said within a second or two " at least my mom didnt drop me off at some school so she could %&$# the mailman. I couldnt stop laughing, it was the best and quickest comeback i had ever heard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PokerPacker Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 when i was younger my friends and I were camping across the river from one of the most prestigous preparatory schools in the country, and that is when i heard one of the fastest and best comebacks ever.some of the students were on the other side of the river probably smoking pot or something when one of them said " hey tomboy faggot campers". my friend said within a second or two " at least my mom didnt drop me off at some school so she could %&$# the mailman. I couldnt stop laughing, it was the best and quickest comeback i had ever heard. wow, i'm gonna remember that one (though will change the intricacies as the situation permits) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bonef1de Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 I always enjoyed telling someone to shut their "man pleaser" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RVAbrendan Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 "you're ****ing ugly" you can't come back from that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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