Touchdown Redskins Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 So, today my mom says to me, "You'll never know how much my father and I love you. You'll only know when you have a kid of your own." And I began to think about it. Then I saw Praise_Gibbs' thread on being a father, and everyone telling him his life was going to change. What does having a kid actually feel like? Do you actually go from being one person one minute, and then a second after your kid is born you become another person? What's it like? I'm really curious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Capt. Kaos Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 Trying to quantify the feelings that you have as a parent is nearly impossible. The only way I can try and put it in a nutshell is to say that as a parent you would give any and everything for your child. My own personal safety is not even a consideration in comparison of my kids safety. There is no drug that can male you smile the way your kids can and there is no heartache that can hurt you the way your kids can. As far as the when, for me there were several moments that I had that "wow" moment. The first was when I held them, then again the 1st time they grab your finger and hold on tight, when they fall asleep on your chest for the first time, hearing Daddy (that one never gets old). Thats just a short list, there are tons of other things that are special to each child. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
frostyj Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 You really don't change who you are as a person, some do but I didn't. It really adds more responsibility and to sum it up it is Awesome. Day to day activities do change but it is way worth it. Can't really put words to it, your mom is right you have to experience it. Capt. K is dead on!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Capt Rich Fla Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 Great job Chaos. Don't forget when you take them out of the car when thay are sleepy and they hold onto you. Oh, my heart could explode. I don't know about anybody else, but just watching them breathe at night while they sleep is like meditation to me. My question is. Will I ever love someone else even half as much. I never felt this way about the wildest crush I ever had on a girlfriend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bang Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 You really realize there's far more purpose to your life than just your own. Everything else I ever thought I wanted became secondary for me almost instantly. Everything. ~Bang Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sticksboi05 Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 There is no greater bond than that of parent and child in nature. It's why human adults give anything for their children. It's why bears kill to protect their young, why kangaroos have pouches etc. We as humans are lucky we get to express our love in more complex ways than animals. I ponder one day what I will feel when I hear I'm going to be a father. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IbleedBnG83 Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 To the OP; Is there anyone in your life, that you would sacrifice your personal happiness, life, and soul to make sure that person was happy? You would go to jail for? You would kill for? You would be willing to go to hell for? Having a child is someone who looks to you for everything and you are their hero. No one else matters to them (at least at first:)). All of a sudden, you embrace this being and don't ever want harm to come to this person that came from your body. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Burgundy Burner Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 I have a daughter who is four years older than you and even though she is an adult, she is also my little girl (all 5'10" of her, hehe). That never changes. In other words, you never stop being a parent and you never stop being a child to your parents. For as long as I am around, she will have situations where I am needed. Being a parent never ends. Never. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Touchdown Redskins Posted March 23, 2009 Author Share Posted March 23, 2009 Wow guys, this is pretty amazing. I think what intrigues me about this is that I can't really comprehend what it feels like to put yourself second. At this point in my life, my career comes first, and sometimes I feel selfish, and I wonder if I'll ever be able to put myself second to someone else (like a kid). Apparently, it just happens. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sticksboi05 Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 Wow guys, this is pretty amazing. I think what intrigues me about this is that I can't really comprehend what it feels like to put yourself second. At this point in my life, my career comes first, and sometimes I feel selfish, and I wonder if I'll ever be able to put myself second to someone else (like a kid). Apparently, it just happens. You know how when you have your first dog as a kid and it dies and it is so devastating because you loved it so much, think of that love and multiply it...ALOT. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PCS Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 Couldn't tell you. Never been a parent. I can only speak from the expereince of helping to raise 2 brothers and then being Mr. Mom/Uncle PCS to my nephew for the first two 4 years of his life,(first 2 years he and his parents were my roommates). A roller coaster ride. The ultimate emotional ride you can ever go on. A child is the very definition of special. They're happy, you're happy. You could be having the worst day of your life,and then they see you when you walk in the door,flash that big smile,run to you,reach out their arms, and give a hug after you pick them up and the bad day is forgotten. They hurt,you hurt. You would,without hesitation,take on their pain so they wouldn't have to feel any. They cry, you want to many times. As they grow and mature,so do you. They are your life. And that's just being the doting uncle. I would hazard a guess and say that it's exponentially more than that being the parent. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
frostyj Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 Couldn't tell you. Never been a parent. I can only speak from the expereince of helping to raise 2 brothers and then being Mr. Mom/Uncle PCS to my nephew for the first two 4 years of his life,(first 2 years he and his parents were my roommates). A roller coaster ride. The ultimate emotional ride you can ever go on. A child is the very definition of special. They're happy, you're happy. You could be having the worst day of your life,and then they see you when you walk in the door,flash that big smile,run to you,reach out their arms, and give a hug after you pick them up and the bad day is forgotten. They hurt,you hurt. You would,without hesitation,take on their pain so they wouldn't have to feel any. They cry, you want to many times. As they grow and mature,so do you. They are your life. And that's just being the doting uncle. I would hazard a guess and say that it's exponentially more being the parent. I helped raise my 3 nephews and that was great! Went thru a lot of what you said. Not to take anything away but when I had my own child, there was just something there you can't explain. It is so very different. The same feelings are there but they are much much greater when it is your own. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IbleedBnG83 Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 Wow guys, this is pretty amazing. I think what intrigues me about this is that I can't really comprehend what it feels like to put yourself second. At this point in my life, my career comes first, and sometimes I feel selfish, and I wonder if I'll ever be able to put myself second to someone else (like a kid). Apparently, it just happens. Not quite my friend. Unfortunately, there are parents who still put themselves, their careers, and their needs ahead of their kids. Those are called neglectful parents. I still like to believe that the underlying feeling of having a child is there for all parents, but the sad truth its not. Thats why there are parents who abandon their kids. The best advice I ever got was "Always remember to put your kids first." Its like a relationship, it doesn't just happen, it also takes work. But the feeling of sacrifice typically just happens I suppose. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Califan007 The Constipated Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 It's indescribable, a feeling of love inside that is amazingly intense and fulfilling. Everything everyone has already said in this thread is sooooo true :yes:...and, yes, when they're young you DO just stand there and watch them sleep lol...you lightly rub the side of their sleeping heads as they do, and your heart just thumps in your chest as you smile watching them just breathe. There was an episode of the Simpsons that relived the day Maggie was born, and before she was born Homer was finally out of debt and could afford to quit working at the Nuclear plant (he pretty much tells off Mr. Burns on his way out lol). He's finally happy working at a bowling alley, content with two kids and no real financial responsibility...and then Marge becomes pregnant. And then Homer has to go crawling back to ask for his job back because of the extra money he'll need raising yet another kid...Homer's all depressed and stuff like that there...until he holds Maggie for the first time, and she grabs onto his finger with her tiny fist. At that point, it's all over...Homer's a dad again lol. After giving him his job back, Mr. Burns punishes Homer by installing a plaque over his work station that says something like "Don't forget: You're here forever". Only Homer places a bunch of pics of Maggie over some of the letters and words, so that it now reads "Do it for her". That, right there, is what being a parent really is. :yes: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mardi gras skin Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 Wow guys, this is pretty amazing. I think what intrigues me about this is that I can't really comprehend what it feels like to put yourself second. At this point in my life, my career comes first, and sometimes I feel selfish, and I wonder if I'll ever be able to put myself second to someone else (like a kid). Apparently, it just happens. I have a 3 year old girl and a 6 year old girl. It doesn't feel like I'm being selfless when I put them first. Its more like investing with compound interest. My satisfaction far exceeds my investment. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twa Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 Yep well said Mardi Gras...my daughter is flying in tonight and it feels like Christmas did as a child. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dictator Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 Trying to quantify the feelings that you have as a parent is nearly impossible. The only way I can try and put it in a nutshell is to say that as a parent you would give any and everything for your child. My own personal safety is not even a consideration in comparison of my kids safety. There is no drug that can male you smile the way your kids can and there is no heartache that can hurt you the way your kids can.As far as the when, for me there were several moments that I had that "wow" moment. The first was when I held them, then again the 1st time they grab your finger and hold on tight, when they fall asleep on your chest for the first time, hearing Daddy (that one never gets old). Thats just a short list, there are tons of other things that are special to each child. Precisely. The best part of my day is going up to get my daughter out of her crib and seeing her smile as I go to pick her up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
youngestson Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 So, today my mom says to me, "You'll never know how much my father and I love you. You'll only know when you have a kid of your own."And I began to think about it. Then I saw Praise_Gibbs' thread on being a father, and everyone telling him his life was going to change. What does having a kid actually feel like? Do you actually go from being one person one minute, and then a second after your kid is born you become another person? What's it like? I'm really curious. Odd as it may sound I did go from being one person to another almost immedeatly. As posted above it's diffacult to quantify or explain exactly in what ways you change and what it feels like, as I suspect it is very different for different people. HOwever, the love you have for your children is different then any other you will ever have. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Special K Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 Well, my have always parents told me it was complete and utter hell... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drop Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 it's really just a transition from all of your responsibilities being about you, to all of your responsibilities being greater than you. once you're a parent, you simply understand that there are more important things in the world than what you want or what you need. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twa Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 Well, my have always parents told me it was complete and utter hell... It can be at times:) You will experience fears,anger and worries to a degree you never imagined. But there is also the flip side to that with the joy,love and happiness. Much like finding true love,a child expands the range of emotions possible and it's depths Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Special K Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 It can be at times:)You will experience fears,anger and worries to a degree you never imagined. But there is also the flip side to that with the joy,love and happiness. Much like finding true love,a child expands the range of emotions possible and it's depths Lol, well, fyi, I was joking about being a bad little child. :evilg: My parents have never told me or my siblings it was hell or that they regretted having children...they would just spank us. Everything you've said in your post, however, I have heard in one way or another pass my parents' lips. They, like most parents, would do anything for their children. I can't wait to go through that experience someday soon with my own children. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ldysknzfn1 Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 Good question. I don't know if I can do it justice thru mere words. It's kinda like being on a rollercoaster....incredible highs and unbelievable lows. It's an awesome feeling at times...and then something doesn't go quite right and you think.."why did I have kids?". But then you remember that day that the nurse put your baby in your arms for the first time and you know that the little person you held is a part of you, born out of a love between 2 people who will help nurture him/her and teach him/her the ways of life. My kids are the only folks I would sacrifice my life for. If I could have taken my son's place on that hospital bed, I would have done it in a flash and not even blinked. They are joy, pain, laughter, tears, happiness, anger, pride and "what the ?" all wrapped up into one body! They show you what life is thru an innocence long lost by adults. I love this little saying I found while working on a scrapbook of my son's life: "While we try to teach our children all about life, our children teach us what life is all about." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twa Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 Lol, well, fyi, I was joking about being a bad little child. :evilg: I figured,hence the The little devils/angels can give ya emotional whiplash though:cool: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dreamshatterer Posted March 23, 2009 Share Posted March 23, 2009 Got a 5 1/2 year old boy and the wife is 4 1/2 months prego with our lil girl. The things that you would do just to make them happy and having the upmost pride when you do. Making sure my kids grow up and turn out to be better than me is all I think about. Plus when your at work our out with friends, you end up saying "I gotta go to the potty" then "bathroom" a lot more than you should. LOL! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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