rincewind Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 A lot of people are that weak.Tony right now is doing something WRONG because he sees no drawbacks to it. He needs to be SHOWN that there are consequences. Can someone explain to me the drawbacks of going to confront Tony? I dont see any. He could put a .22 slug into your head. That would put a definite damper on your day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheSteve Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 Can someone explain to me the drawbacks of going to confront Tony? I dont see any. He might be MassSkinsFan?:whoknows: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoony Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 Insecurities lead to fear and anxiety. Fear and anxiety result in aggression in males and crying in females. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
visionary Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 He might be MassSkinsFan?:whoknows: guy has a pregnant girlfriend...so I doubt it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoony Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 guy has a pregnant girlfriend...so I doubt it... :laugh: :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Major Harris Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 I just don't see what confronting would do. She cheats on me, the relationship is done - i don't need to even talk to the guy. rince, that's fine and dandy. but this dude has kids involved. kids change things. if you had kids, i doubt it'd be that simple. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goaldeje Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 There seem to be two groups here: one who is concerned primarily with the sanctity of marriage, and the other that is concerned with the rights or feelings of those involved. Art's view is simply that when he and his wife took the vows of marriage, they became one. Their collective "rights" were subverted, as it were, under the umbrella of marriage. One of them has now gone outside of those marriage rights. Until the marriage is actually officially ended, the marriage rights are still in place, and Art feels he has to do whatever he needs to do to protect his marriage. If that includes confrontation (physical or otherwise) with the guilty male, so be it. The marriage comes first. Those who argue against Art, do you realize how strong that marriage is? Before you flame this, allow me to anticipate your responses: 1) a marriage based on violence isn't strong. Wrong. Art's (sorry to use you so prevelently, Art, but you brought this upon yourself!) marriage is not BASED upon violence. It's based upon the bond the two of them have in marriage. If he has to use violence to maintain that bond, so be it. This is a man who would do anything to maintain that marriage. 2) violence is never the answer. Wrong again. That's not the point here, anyway. I am sure you would continue on to say that they should talk things through, Art should change his behavior to accomdate her needs, etc. WRONG. The marriage must be assured of continuing first. Then felt needs can be addressed. If violence is needed to ensure that the marriage continues, or to establish that it will not, so be it. The marriage, one way or another, comes first. At the risk of being crucified, allow me to add one final thought. Children should NEVER come first in a marriage. Your spouse should. You are not married to yuor children, you're married to your spouse. The marriage comes first, everything else after that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PleaseBlitz Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 Again - no need for confrontation, she cheats, i'm out. Why confront the guy? Why NOT confront the guy? I see no reason not to. We just have different personalities Rince, It would make me feel better to have words with some guy that disrespected me and my family like that. Its just me, Im obviously (thank god) not everyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Major Harris Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 I don't buy that macho stuff. I just fail to see how that would accomplish anything. Sure, you're going to be pissed and want to pound the guy but it just doesn't do any good. There's something to be said for restraint and reason as well as big heavy balls if you ask me. i don't think confronting someone has anything to do w/ macho. confrontation doesn't have to = violence. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xameil Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 Why NOT confront the guy? I see no reason not to. We just have different personalities Rince, It would make me feel better to have words with some guy that disrespected me and my family like that. Its just me, Im obviously (thank god) not everyone. two words... Hired Thugs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rincewind Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 rince, that's fine and dandy. but this dude has kids involved. kids change things. if you had kids, i doubt it'd be that simple. I think kids would actually further solidify my position. Trust me, THE LAST THING i ever want to do is get divorced with kids (my parents did it to me, i sure as hell don't want to do it to my kids) - but if she gets to the point where she needs to be in the arms of another man, than she doesn't need to be in mine. I'm done with her. Furthermore, i'm taking the high road so that i can keep my kids. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DCsportsfan53 Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 rince, that's fine and dandy. but this dude has kids involved. kids change things. if you had kids, i doubt it'd be that simple. It still doesn't change anything. So you whoop his ass, then what? If you're wife wants to stay with you she'll give the guy up completely and he'll be out of your life anyways. What then was the point of kicking his ass? If she won't give him up, I'd say it's time for a divorce, in which case, who cares who she's :hump: ing? The only benefit to it is that it'll soothe the ego of the husband. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SkinsNut73 Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 I'm only advocating making a stand and making sure all parties involved are held accountable. Best way that's done is man to man, face to face. Anything less is a cop-out imho. ... I see where you, and others who hold the same view, are coming from on this...I personally wouldn't go that route though. Not because I'm a wimp or I'm copping out.... I might go to Tony's live-in girlfriend and let her know what's up....but I'm not interested in Tony at all. He is dead to me. My vows were with my wife and that's the person I'm dealing with, and she's really the only one I'm dealing with (unless I can hook up with Tony's girlfriend of course.....KIDDING!!! ). Maybe I would change my views if I was actually going through this situation, but I just don't see it now. At this point I'm confronting my wife and her only. I want to talk about how she, at the very least, emotionally cheated on me....and how could the woman I fell in love with - whom I thought I knew so well - "steal" a man who has a girlfriend at home who is pregnant??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prosperity Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 wow this is a pretty heavy thread, I am not going to pretend I know what I am talking about, but Art's advice seems to be pretty good. At least you might feel better about yourself in the end. Please make sure you know I posted that before Art started advocating beating up disobedient/cheating wives. That crap can fly in Saudi Arabia but I thought people like that weren't tolerated here. :doh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HOF44 Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 1) a marriage based on violence isn't strong. Wrong. X's (sorry to use you so prevelently, X, but you brought this upon yourself!) marriage is not BASED upon violence. It's based upon the bond the two of them have in marriage. If he has to use violence to maintain that bond, so be it. This is a man who would do anything to maintain that marriage. So if she wants to leave its a ok to beat the crap out of her to make her stay?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rincewind Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 Why NOT confront the guy? I see no reason not to. We just have different personalities Rince, It would make me feel better to have words with some guy that disrespected me and my family like that. Its just me, Im obviously (thank god) not everyone. Because what good could possibly come from confronting the guy if i've broken it off with my wife? Name me one positive that could possibly come from that scenario? Remember - my relationship would be done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheSteve Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 two words...Hired Thugs But then it's not you confronting the guy, and thus wouldn't make him feel better by having confronted him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoony Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 Why NOT confront the guy? I see no reason not to. We just have different personalities Rince, It would make me feel better to have words with some guy that disrespected me and my family like that. Its just me, Im obviously (thank god) not everyone. This world only has room for one PB, most definitely i don't think confronting someone has anything to do w/ macho.confrontation doesn't have to = violence. Preach on, brother. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Major Harris Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 It still doesn't change anything. So you whoop his ass, then what? If you're wife wants to stay with you she'll give the guy up completely and he'll be out of your life anyways. What then was the point of kicking his ass? If she won't give him up, I'd say it's time for a divorce, in which case, who cares who she's :hump: ing? The only benefit to it is that it'll soothe the ego of the husband. i'm not in the "whoop his ass" camp, so i'm not sure why you went there. rince said, she cheats, it's done. i say w/ kids, it's not that easy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DCsportsfan53 Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 Why NOT confront the guy? I see no reason not to. We just have different personalities Rince, It would make me feel better to have words with some guy that disrespected me and my family like that. Its just me, Im obviously (thank god) not everyone. The wife's the one who disrespected the family. The other dude may not even know girl has a family, depending on what she told him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Major Harris Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 Furthermore, i'm taking the high road so that i can keep my kids. good luck w/ that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Goaldeje Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 So if she wants to leave its a ok to beat the crap out of her to make her stay?? Nonesense. At that time, if she wants out, let her out. Take steps to protect yourself, of course. But in this case here, we have no verbal evidence from the wife saying she wants out. Until then, protect the marriage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlexRS Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 Questions for those FOR confronting Tony. 1) How would you go about doing it? 2) What do you want to achieve? 3) What chance (in %) do you think 1) has to successfully achieve 2)? 4) Is there any other way to achieve 2)? Thank You. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prosperity Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 The wife's the one who disrespected the family. The other dude may not even know girl has a family, depending on what she told him. That's why you should talk to him Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rincewind Posted May 16, 2006 Share Posted May 16, 2006 good luck w/ that. She commits adultery - i've done nothing wrong. How do you think i'm not going to get the kids? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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