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I Solved the Gay Marriage Problem


ThePreciating

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I have yet to find a flaw in this solution.

The state from now on will only perform civil unions between two people. No marriages. Any two people who want the legal bindings brought about by marriage need to get this civil union.

Marriages are handled by religious institutions only, and get no state recognition by themselves. Each religion can therefore set its own standard. The state will have no reason to intervene, since the state is only concerned with civil unions.

What's the problem with this approach?

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Problem 1: A lot of people don't want it solved. :)

That said, though. Every time Tailgate raises the subject, somebody proposes that solution, and tons of people all express agreement with this radical new proposal.

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No problems at all with this solution, except one.

If it had been proposed years ago, it would be perfect. Now, however, there is so much water under the bridge and bad feelings on both sides that no one will accept it. Gays will think - correctly - that the change is just being made to deny them full societal recognition of their marriage. Conservatives will think - correctly - that the change is just being made to take away their ability to deny gays full societal recognition of their "whatever it is but it isn't a marriage."

So it's doomed.

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well i would say they should recognize them rather than perform them, but yeah, that's what "ought" to happen. even though it seems to me that'd be the conservative solution ("the gov't can't tell me what to do") it's the conservatives that don't like it.

and of course this super duper solution results in some VERY complicated problems in terms of taxes, fraud, divorce court, insurance, benefits, health care, debt obligation, etc etc etc.

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I wrote my state senator (not fed) with this suggestion. I guess my putting it in with other stuff allowed him to ignore it in his response. It's a shame, because I think he was one of the one's filabustering it in the MD state house...but then again Anne Arundel County isn't exactly a bastion of liberal/progressive thoughts in MD. grrrr.

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No problems at all with this solution, except one.

If it had been proposed years ago, it would be perfect. Now, however, there is so much water under the bridge and bad feelings on both sides that no one will accept it. Gays will think - correctly - that the change is just being made to deny them full societal recognition of their marriage. Conservatives will think - correctly - that the change is just being made to take away their ability to deny gays full societal recognition of their "whatever it is but it isn't a marriage."

So it's doomed.

That's what I don't get. It's essentially that way now. Why not just make it so? Gays will always feel treaded on and the religious right will always love doing the treading. I don't see anything changing if the Government did what it says, which is stay out of religious matters, then practice what they preach in that marriage is a religious issue, then agree that two people sharing a home and family should get benefits associated to them under the facade that is "civil union" or "marriage".

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hint: some people don't agree with the separation of church and state. (often the same people who make the most noise about the constitution being sacred, etc)

Oh, this thread wasn't going to get spun to death before, you had to bring that discussion into it, too, didn't you? :)

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I have yet to find a flaw in this solution.

The state from now on will only perform civil unions between two people. No marriages. Any two people who want the legal bindings brought about by marriage need to get this civil union.

Marriages are handled by religious institutions only, and get no state recognition by themselves. Each religion can therefore set its own standard. The state will have no reason to intervene, since the state is only concerned with civil unions.

What's the problem with this approach?

The thing is, this approach really changes nothing but the terminology. It would make more sense to simply make gay marriages legal than to go about it this way.

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The thing is, this approach really changes nothing but the terminology. It would make more sense to simply make gay marriages legal than to go about it this way.

No, it actually makes sense. Terminology matters sometimes. People who feel that their religious beliefs are separate and special in this area will get to say: "They may have a civil union, but they don't have a Baptist marriage as we understand it" and they will be correct. It will remove the (false but strongly held) fear among the right that churches will be forced to perform gay marriages or face anti-discrimination laws.

And gays who wish to do so can go be married by a Unitarian Universalist minister. Everyone wins.

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That said, though. Every time Tailgate raises the subject, somebody proposes that solution, and tons of people all express agreement with this radical new proposal.

LOL- OP, we also landed on the moon ya know :silly:

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and of course this super duper solution results in some VERY complicated problems in terms of taxes, fraud, divorce court, insurance, benefits, health care, debt obligation, etc etc etc.

Not really. Civil unions would be treated as marriages currently are treated. Religious Marriage would have no legal standing and would be solely a religious construct.

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I really don't have a problem accepting civil unions between gay couples. With benefits provided to families and spouses and the whole thing.

I just don't want it called marriage. Marriage is between a husband and wife. Let a civil union be between two males or two females. I'd be fine with that.

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I really don't have a problem accepting civil unions between gay couples. With benefits provided to families and spouses and the whole thing.

I just don't want it called marriage. Marriage is between a husband and wife. Let a civil union be between two males or two females. I'd be fine with that.

I agree 100%. I dont want them to be denied any rights or anything like that. They can be together. I just do not think it should be called a marriage. A marriage was defined as a man and a woman and is a religious partnership. It should remain that way. But I would be out there supporting gay rights because I definitely think they deserve them.

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I have yet to find a flaw in this solution.

The state from now on will only perform civil unions between two people. No marriages. Any two people who want the legal bindings brought about by marriage need to get this civil union.

Marriages are handled by religious institutions only, and get no state recognition by themselves. Each religion can therefore set its own standard. The state will have no reason to intervene, since the state is only concerned with civil unions.

What's the problem with this approach?

Here is a down side for the state - read taxpayer as I see it with this approach. Heterosexuals can make babies on their own - Homosexuals cannot - whether intended or not.

Current state benefits give more to unwed non working mothers with infants than those married to the working father.

For social reasons some get married despite the fiscal ramifications. Your proposal would then encourage marriage for the above scenario but discourage civil unions - as I see the later strictly a financial thing and the former a religious thing under your proposal. Divorce would also be a religious thing vice a legal thing if a couple never applied for a civil union.

Between two adults without children maybe not a huge issue in many cases add in children and it complicates things. I could see how your proposal would then create more payouts buy the state/taxpayer all in the name of trying to appease everyone.

When it comes to taxes most everyone will likely do what is best for them. Should doing a civil union benefit them the most financially they will do it. Should it not they will not. This will result in less income in and more qualifying for welfare/WIC.

I think it is in the states best interest to encourage couples who bring children into this world to stay together. This is not only best (in most cases) for the children it is best for the state. All the other stuff about marriage - civil unions is secondary to me.

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I don't think I understand your point, islehawg.

The idea, as I understand it, is that everyone would get civil unions. That would be the legal thing. Meanwhile some (most) people would get religious "marriage" ceremonies too.

I don't see how this would lead to any more payouts by the state to anyone. It doesn't discourage anyone from getting married. Quite the contrary.

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I don't think I understand your point, islehawg.

The idea, as I understand it, is that everyone would get civil unions. That would be the legal thing. Meanwhile some (most) people would get religious "marriage" ceremonies too.

I don't see how this would lead to any more payouts by the state to anyone. It doesn't discourage anyone from getting married. Quite the contrary.

My understanding of the OP was they would be separate - one legally recognized by the state the other religiously recognized by the church.

A marriage license currently is something required of the state not church to formalize the wedding is it not? Some churches (such as the Catholic church I was raised in) do not recognize some legal aspects of state marriage such as divorce. What then would force the church to require a civil union or marriage license or register with the state that the marriage occurred?

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The first time I saw this proposed, it was by Mike Kinsley, and it was the 90s. Its called "privatization". Get the govt out of the marriage business.

Here's an actual original solution. Take the Ms and Fs off of the birth certificates and drivers licenses. As long as 2 people over 18 present themselves at the county courthouse, they can get married. Its none of the gubmints damn business whether I've got a dingly-dangly or a va-jay-jay anyhow.

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I think the solution proposed by the OP would work. Only thing is all of the extree religious people would go bonkers and then say they deserve extra benefits since they aren't sinning or something crazy like that.

Seriously...this should be a non-issue though. People need to get over themselves.

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What then would force the church to require a civil union or marriage license or register with the state that the marriage occurred?

Nothing... and that's kind of the point. If you want legal benefits you have to file for a license. There's no crossover whatsoever between your marriage under god and your civil union under the state.

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