Sweet Sassy Molassy Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 This is something that really upsets me. Whenever I hear someone say, "Oh you're acting white.", it really boils my blood. Now I'm very liberal when it comes to race, well everything really. I make all types of jokes and I don't mind my white buddies making jokes, we all know when to stop. But we do it all in fun, and I find that it really makes people more open to talking about racial problems/relations when you can make jokes, and know that people aren't overly sensitive about it. And even though I don't mind making jokes at other peoples expense, and them making jokes at mine, it just really annoys me when I hear someone say that someone is not "black enough", "acts white", "acts black", etc. Now none of my close friends who know me have ever said anything like that. But I was at a friends party recently, and a guy who I used to work with at Apple was there, and we were talking about something it was a group of us, I can't remember the convo. Either way, he said something like "you people" (not meaning you black people), but I started messing with him saying, "You people! WTF are you trying to say man?". Well he goes, "What? You're the whitest black guy I know!", I just sort of looked at him, I didn't say anything, but it really annoys me. I mean the guy doesn't even know me that well. I've gotten that before though, just because I like rock music, I do listen to rap too, but some of my favorite artist are rock acts. Or because, I have a number of white friends. Or because I don't talk "black", whatever that means, but I'll touch on this subject in a second. It also goes the other way around, I've heard people say a white person is acting black, because the person listens to rap, or have a lot of black friends. So, my question is, do you believe there is a such thing as acting white, or acting black? Also, do you believe that people are not black enough or white enough? I once heard a white guy tell a black guy, "Man, I'm blacker than you are!" WTF, does that mean? The other thing that I've noticed, and that annoys me as well is when people say someone is talking black, or talking white. Again, I've had black people and white people tell me that I talk white. Someone said it was because I talk so proper, and I don't use a lot of slang. Usually, I find that when people say someone is talking "white", it's because the person is not talking ignorant, imo. And talking black is usually equated to speaking unintelligently, and that's why it really annoys me. So do you think there's a such as talking black, or white? Now don't get me wrong, I don't want to upset anybody, but this is a question that's been on my mind, and I want to see what other people think. Thoughts are appreciated, thanks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KevinthePRF Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 If you're racist there is such thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CandaceM23 Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 The media created this situation .... Each group of people is portrayed in a certain light .... For example, I've seen way too many movies or television shows portraying black folks as gangbangers & I've seen white people being portrayed as stupid farm folks. Which brings up a question that I have ... sorry ... but I'll ask you sweetheart. Are you offended when people say that you're black versus African American? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RabidFan Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 You must really hate when someone says "you're very well spoken"...j/k I totally hear you and am half white and latino but you never hear anyone say you're acting latino....its crazy but they should use a word like urban or maybe ghetto(not painting a broad stroke but thinking of a term one could use) when describing lets say Seth Green in Can't Hardly Wait or the boyfriend and his crew of Anne Hathaway's character in Havoc....i mean that is not normal behavior and slang of anyone white OR black but just kids being kids trying to find a niche to fit into which would probable be different in 10 years....who knows but I agree with all what you said and by no means to; as Parcells would say, "disrepsect" any cultures or races with my comments as I'm sure i could have made my points clearer but do not edit my responses or look them over as this is a message board and not a term paper. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rumrunner6900 Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 So, my question is, do you believe there is a such thing as acting white, or acting black? Also, do you believe that people are not black enough or white enough? I once heard a white guy tell a black guy, "Man, I'm blacker than you are!" WTF, does that mean? The other thing that I've noticed, and that annoys me as well is when people say someone is talking black, or talking white. Again, I've had black people and white people tell me that I talk white. Someone said it was because I talk so proper, and I don't use a lot of slang. Usually, I find that when people say someone is talking "white", it's because the person is not talking ignorant, imo. And talking black is usually equated to speaking unintelligently, and that's why it really annoys me. So do you think there's a such as talking black, or white? Now don't get me wrong, I don't want to upset anybody, but this is a question that's been on my mind, and I want to see what other people think. Thoughts are appreciated, thanks. I think there is such a thing...but it is a product of society and attitudes and such. Some folks are expected to act a certain way. I dated a black girl in college and she always told me she was whiter than I was (mostly b/c of music and movie interests). I think it is all someone's perception of another if they are "not black enough or white enough". My :2cents: are that people should just be who they are and you can't make everyone happy so if you are not what someone else thinks you should be....eff em! As a comedian-whose-name-I-can't-remember said. "Lets keep on ******* til we are all the same color!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dks1240 Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 I can relate, ssm. I work at an afterschool program and it consists of about 100 black children and no white children (I am the only white persn in the building 99% of the time). I get along great with the kids and vice versa but there is one thing they do regularly that I can't stand. The kids love insulting each other by calling each other "white" or saying "you wish you were white, dont you?" One day Im just going to ask them, what exactly do you mean by someone is acting "white"? I have struggled with whether or not I should say something to the kids, that it somewhat offends me when they say this (right infront of me too). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Sassy Molassy Posted January 31, 2006 Author Share Posted January 31, 2006 The media created this situation .... Each group of people is portrayed in a certain light .... For example, I've seen way too many movies or television shows portraying black folks as gangbangers & I've seen white people being portrayed as stupid farm folks.Which brings up a question that I have ... sorry ... but I'll ask you sweetheart. Are you offended when people say that you're black versus African American? I don't have a problem with someone saying black, or African American. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MoeRedskins Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 My buddy one time (who was black) was at a function talking to this old white lady with me and she turned to him and said "You talk so proper." I looked at her and asked "Do I talk proper?" She didn't say anything. But it is all media spin. I just don't get how the black/white community can get upset at a certan person b/c they don't act a certain way. Its like we can't appreciate what they have done unless the masses can relate to them in some way. Its sad. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
boobiemiles Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 I like this thread......with that said, race dictates our lives whether people want to admit it or not. I've had people say, "wow you going to school to become****, wow you get to work with all those white people". I don't get offended at the conotations, but the fact they are right. It's true that the media creates our perceptions, but we as a society act on them. I don't joke about race at all. In my mind I am a lost African in America. But that comes from studying history, and understanding it. Somebody said that you have to be "racist" to percieve wether you black or white....that is he problem. People don't know the difference between being prejudice or racist. As a county we need to face the racial issue, and then we can start getting over skin color. But being black or white is just one of the many "isms" that people face in our society. Women face prejudice and racism, so do asians, and latin Americans. But honestly I guess you act like the people you surrond yourself with. if your more comfortable with white people, then people percieve you as an Uncle Tom, and if you hang out with just black guys your a thug. But honestly you have to make yourself happy. That is all that counts in the end. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlexRS Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 So, my question is, do you believe there is a such thing as acting white, or acting black? Also, do you believe that people are not black enough or white enough? I once heard a white guy tell a black guy, "Man, I'm blacker than you are!" WTF, does that mean? There is no such thing as acting or speaking white or black. Color of skin does not predispose one to act or speak in any particular way. Whenever somebody says "acting white" or "speaking black" or whatever... what really happens here is stereotyping - they basically associate a set of behaviours with a skin color. We usually associate "stereotyping" with negativity - but it is an essential and natural process. Everybody stereotypes, for it is merely a function of our brain. However, the way we stereotype is up to us! We can examine and question stereotypes we use to see if they are appropriate. Again, let me repeat - we cannot avoid stereotyping. Even at the most basic level, we would get overwhelmed with infromation if we did not stereotype. It is necessary. The goal is to make sure our stereotypes are consistent, that we are open to questioning them, and that we do not judge based on them. Isn't this what you were talking about when you wrote that you can openly joke about stereotypes? This whole "political correctness" business would lead you to believe that stereotyping is wrong. Just like any other natural function of our brain, it is only wrong to let it have control over our rational mind. Trying to "remove all stereotypes" is counter productive because we reject stereotyping altogether and end up with cognitive dissonance. As for those people who say "acting black" or "acting white" - they simply have not questioned their stereotypes. They made the basic association between activity and skin color and refused to dig deeper. Hey, whatchagonnado. Not everybody will get it right away. And yes, it still all comes down to good parenting Let's say there are two events repeatedly happening in a certain succession. We could easily percieve them to be cause-effect related. One event causes another. Yet until we examine the mechanism of causation we cannot know whether our perceptions are true. Same with stereotypes. There is no relation between skin color and speech, for example :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mister Looney Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 I don't like the stereotypes, but all too often you see someone who IS the stereotype, and you have to say to yourself, this is why black people are perceived as this, and white people are perceived as that. I don't know about acting black or acting white, but I do know that some people try way too hard to fit into the stereotype of one or the other. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoony Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 That's a good question SSM. I really don't know. I'd like to say NO... that there is no acting black or white, and that there are just people. And actually I do believe that. But certainly if one did a poll or a survey, the results would show that most white people like John Mayer and most black people like rap, r&b, etc. (Chappelle show ) So really, I think it is a convenient and easy label to apply when a black guy likes john mayer or a white guy is into Kanye West.... to say 'he acts white' or 'he acts black' , etc. etc. That said, it certainly doesn't make it right, and it certainly doesn't make it any less insulting. From what you said you handled the situation with a lot of class... If I were you I probably would have made a scene. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Sassy Molassy Posted January 31, 2006 Author Share Posted January 31, 2006 I can relate, ssm. I work at an afterschool program and it consists of about 100 black children and no white children (I am the only white persn in the building 99% of the time). I get along great with the kids and vice versa but there is one thing they do regularly that I can't stand. The kids love insulting each other by calling each other "white" or saying "you wish you were white, dont you?" One day Im just going to ask them, what exactly do you mean by someone is acting "white"? I have struggled with whether or not I should say something to the kids, that it somewhat offends me when they say this (right infront of me too). I've seen that too. I used to work in an afterschool program as well. And I saw my share of kids using that as an insult. A lot of time they didn't realize that they were feeding into the stereotypes when they thought talking using bad grammar or just sounding ignorant in general was acting black. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HOF44 Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 I've seen that too. I used to work in an afterschool program as well. And I saw my share of kids using that as an insult. A lot of time they didn't realize that they were feeding into the stereotypes when they thought talking using bad grammar or just sounding ignorant in general was acting black. I think the bad grammer, education is uncool type of thing is killing alot of kids chances to thrive today, black and white. Its a sad state of affairs that educated intelligent black people are said to be acting white. Its as if in pop culture if your not uneducated and speaking street talk your acting white. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stwasm Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 Welcome to my world, fellow Extremers. My parents always taught me to use proper English and act like I had some sense. I was always teased by other black kids by that and black girls thought either I was "trying to be white" or gay. And, yes, I get the "you talk real nice" comments and other crap like that. In fact, just recently, I discovered that some women at my church thought I was guy, and one even suggested that I "lose some of my properness." Believe me, it's very frustrating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kevinklein Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 I'm not a racist, but I understand the irony. I find it humorous, not offensive. It's playing on stereotypes, not neccesarily exploiting them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ball Coach Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 Stereotypes are a facinating topic. How does something become a stereotype? Of course there are some differences between races, speech is probably one of them. There is probably a better way of saying someone is acting black or acting white, but there is obviously some truth behind it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Sassy Molassy Posted January 31, 2006 Author Share Posted January 31, 2006 Stereotypes are a facinating topic. How does something become a stereotype? Of course there are some differences between races, speech is probably one of them. There is probably a better way of saying someone is acting black or acting white, but there is obviously some truth behind it. Please explain? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spaceman Spiff Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 I think there's a connotation of white = being stiff, plain and uptight. You can hear it when Eddie Murphy does his white guy impression and when Dave Chappelle does that newscaster bit. I'm guilty of it as well, even though I am white. There's white guy in my office who I've referred as the "whitest guy ever." He's just so...well, stiff and plain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prosperity Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 It is a damn shame that proper English and general success is deemed to be "white." Heh in a few years people will say "Asian" instead. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zoony Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 In fact, just recently, I discovered that some women at my church thought I was gay, and one even suggested that I "lose some of my properness." . Wow. You had a perfect opportunitty to prove it to her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ball Coach Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 Please explain? There are experts that beleive that there is an African American dialect that should be accepted in a standard English curriculum. This includes such things as proper tense and certain sounds. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Die Hard Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 Joe, I hate it when women say "Oh, "men" are like this... like that". The fact is, people form opinions about individiual people/groups concerning just about any identifiable characteristics (clothing, music, art, sports, academics, etc). The reason? That's their experience... it's their perception. And the fact is.... you're guilty of stereotyping as well. We all are. In some capacity or another. Humans experience stimuli and learn. And we make conclusions based on associations. It's in our nature. Right or wrong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stwasm Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 Wow. You had a perfect opportunitty to prove it to her. She turned me off after that statement. I won't apologize to anyone because my parents taught me to express myself like I had some sense. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gortiz Posted January 31, 2006 Share Posted January 31, 2006 Its tough to say, but there are several attributes that african americans almost exclusively demonstrate. Same goes for South/Central/North Americans, Asians, etc. So an argument can be made for YES. I was born in D.C. my parents are hispanic, but my half sisters are hispanic and african american. There dad, who is african american is very close to our family. I went to a predominatley, almost all "white" high school, and I have been close enough to an african american family to be "godfather" to one of the kids in this family. So I got a lot of insight. I'm not going into detail, but African Americans act and do certain things that most "white" people do not do and visa versa. Some bad and some good. So If I saw a "white" person doing one of these several things, I would say, he is acting black. Same goes for Hispanics and all other races. There exceptions to everything, don't get me wrong, but a lot can be said about you depending on your race. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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