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The Miscellaneous Humor Thread---vids/gifs/pics/jokes---no articles, no "owned" stuff

Jumbo

By Jumbo
in The Tailgate

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TheGreatBuzz

TheGreatBuzz

Posted
Posted

We sat behind Fired Up Guy at the game last night.  He was going on about how the park is the only place he doesn't use profanity.  So instead of ass, he said "tookus".  Then was laughing about how it didn't feel right.  He said "tookus just doesn't feel right on my pallette."  I said  

 

Nsfw 

Spoiler

"That just means you aren't eating the right chick's ass."

 

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The Evil Genius

The Evil Genius

Posted
Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, Larry said:

 

Just out of curiosity, is "zipper merge" Latin for "go to the front of the line and shove your way in"?  

 

 

It may feel like someone is cutting in line, but it's the proper way to merge into 1 lane when traffic occupies 2 lanes. It's also, from a traffic modeling perspective, better for traffic congestion.

 

Now, if traffic is moving at full speed in both lanes, then zipper merge isn't warranted and people definitely should get over as a soon as possible. 

 

Edit..I should note that I've been out of the game for 7 years so my transportation planner skills are rusty and perhaps I am giving you outdated info. 

Edited by The Evil Genius
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PokerPacker

PokerPacker

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, The Evil Genius said:

 

It may feel like someone is cutting in line, but it's the proper way to merge into 1 lane when traffic occupies 2 lanes. It's also, from a traffic modeling perspective, better for traffic congestion.

 

Now, if traffic is moving at full speed in both lanes, then zipper merge isn't warranted and people definitely should get over as a soon as possible. 

 

Edit..I should note that I've been out of the game for 7 years so my transportation planner skills are rusty and perhaps I am giving you outdated info. 

Yes, that's the thing, zipper merge isn't always correct.  It's correct in congested traffic.  In moving traffic, if people simply get over when they can then traffic will keep moving.  But then some asshole speeds down the now empty lane and forces his way in at the end and then the people in the remaining lane have to brake to let him in causing congestion.

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skinsmarydu

skinsmarydu

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, PokerPacker said:

Yes, that's the thing, zipper merge isn't always correct.  It's correct in congested traffic.  In moving traffic, if people simply get over when they can then traffic will keep moving.  But then some asshole speeds down the now empty lane and forces his way in at the end and then the people in the remaining lane have to brake to let him in causing congestion.

Or if you just wanna be a Wile E. Coyote like here...US 78 coming into I-285 (our beltway) merges into the left lane.  THERE'S NO WAY THIS WORKS UNLESS PEOPLE KNOW HOW.  KEEP MOVING. 

If no one can properly try to merge into the right-hand lane, try doing it when everyone panics and no one lets you in.  Cars back up behind you, they can't merge, etc.  Then they're trying to merge at 35 into a lane moving about 60...it screws everything up. 

Judge makes sure everyone has an interpreter.  Signs are only written in one language.  Bizarre. 

 

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