First- time fathers... (updated) Day-Care Experiences

[GoSkins561]

Do any have good luck sign children?

What is that?

[Major Harris]

one thing that was kind of hard for me was realizing that all of the things dads are "supposed" to do....teach them to throw, catch, ride a bike, etc...really don't come into play for a while. i sometimes felt like i wasn't much needed, almost disappointed. but just jump in and love the kid and care for the kid, all that stuff will come in due time

[gbear]

on the supposed to do thing...all of that stuff is just after the other supposed to do list like changing diapers, taking to the potty, reading books, being worlds best jungle gym.

"The hardest part of raising my three girls was remembering not to get mad at my kids for acting their age." was my father in law. I can totally see the psycologist in him.

[Thiebear]

DO EVERYTHING you can with them. playgrounds, macaroni projects, homework, forts, bikes, rollerblades, etc.

There will come a day when you can't, and you will look back and smile.

[In Flames]

Making your child/ren priority #1. I quit a very good paying job because i didn't want my son being raised by the babysitter. It didn't help the fact that both my wife and i worked until 3am, and when we picked our son up, he would remain sleeping in his carseat because that's how the sitter let him sleep. About a week after i quit, he was sleeping w/o carseat, and in his own bed. That took ALOT of patience, because he wasn't used to it. Like i said in another thread, i would take a bullet for my kids, w/o hesitation. It is unconditional love.

[mbws]

What are some of the biggest hurdles for first-time fathers to overcome?

The child's mother.

I know a lot has been posted here about how you have to be there for her, which is true, but I'm talking about how she can tend to become the boss of all things child related. This has to be nipped in the bud early. Let her know you respect her feelings, but if you disagree with a particular decision, you MUST speak up. Your opinion is important. If you don't voice it, even for the little things, it won't matter later, when it could be about something important.

One other thing that is not the most important. Father's day is not a real holiday. Get used to it.

[Cooley4President]

This is really a great thread, I didn't know there were so many new and expectant dads on here.

[rd421]

Yeah No sex = No fun...My wife has been super sick the doctor says she has this thing where she is just sick ALL THE TIME...she never feels good generally pregnancy is super hard on her more than normal...it sux man i tell you but I love her and am SOOOO PUMPED for my little girl...You guys will def get to see the pics on her bday!

[WhoRUSupposed2Be]

This is really a great thread, I didn't know there were so many new and expectant dads on here.

I'd like to think that all of us can talk about anything at any given time or place.

Threads like these are important because they can become educational memorandums whereas you're gathering valuable input from all.

[rd421]

I'd like to think that all of us can talk about anything at any given time or place.

Threads like these are important because they can become educational memorandums whereas you're gathering valuable input from all.

Plus when we start going crazy from the whole thing looks like there are a b unch of us in the same boat so I am sure we will have ppl who can relate haha:silly:

[ECU-ALUM]

The first time you hear your child call you "Daddy" there is no other feeling like it in the world...BAR-NONE!

[WhoRUSupposed2Be]

My fiancee and I have already been experiencing some bumps and bruises along the way.

At times when she should be experiencing joy through-out the day, I am feeling neglected and depressed... dealing with this constant ringing in my right ear has left me feeling isolated because then I can not hear anything with/ out my hearing aid. I have to ask people to repeat themselves repeatedly and I know it becomes aggravating at times.

How can I enjoy my son while having this sound in my ear that sounds like a pitching whistle?! On top of that, while she's experiencing mood swings, I am not making things any better on account of my health set-backs.

[SiCkSoULjA]

This thread gets two thumbs up!

My wife and I had our little princess 3 weeks ago and it’s been awesome. You should Really appreciate your wife or girlfriend especially if they are home by themselves with the baby while you’re at work with no help. Tell her you love her every chance you get and get her flowers or something let them no that they are really appreciated and she is doing a great job. There emotions are running rapid and a newborn can be too much for them if they are home by themselves for 8 hours while you’re at work. If you can take off work good do that they need all the help they can get, I couldn’t take off work for long the bills are due and need to be paid so I have to do what I have to do.

I always leave work early as possible to see the baby and the wife. I can't wait for the baby to smile when she is happy and not by accident lol my baby cracks up in her sleep sometimes but can't get her to smile when she’s awake. I am trying not to spoil her and my wife is too but it’s so hard they are so small and innocent. I am at work right not wishing I was home with my wife and my little girl. I really wanted a boy, I love football, basketball I wanted too play ball with them and everything but I tell you this I wouldn’t trade her in for the word she is PERFECT.

[WhoRUSupposed2Be]

This thread gets two thumbs up!

My wife and I had our little princess 3 weeks ago and it’s been awesome. You should Really appreciate your wife or girlfriend especially if they are home by themselves with the baby while you’re at work with no help. Tell her you love her every chance you get and get her flowers or something let them no that they are really appreciated and she is doing a great job. There emotions are running rapid and a newborn can be too much for them if they are home by themselves for 8 hours while you’re at work. If you can take off work good do that they need all the help they can get, I couldn’t take off work for long the bills are due and need to be paid so I have to do what I have to do.

I always leave work early as possible to see the baby and the wife. I can't wait for the baby to smile when she is happy and not by accident lol my baby cracks up in her sleep sometimes but can't get her to smile when she’s awake. I am trying not to spoil her and my wife is too but it’s so hard they are so small and innocent. I am at work right not wishing I was home with my wife and my little girl. I really wanted a boy, I love football, basketball I wanted too play ball with them and everything but I tell you this I wouldn’t trade her in for the word she is PERFECT.

Thank you again for acknowledgement rating of the thread.

I've taken off for one and half week to attend to her needs as well as the babies. Her sister has been here to help during this tiring course (possibly why I feel left out sometimes but most appreciated for her help). We absolutely would've been in wonderland without her sister's support.

I adore my son and everything that he is shaping out to be. But, there is a question... does a father take a step back from the newborns to let the mother's spend their desirable times with them from breastfeeding, diaper changing and etc.

Reminder: I have put in my fair share with the pamper duties as well.

[PeterMP]

This thread gets two thumbs up!

My wife and I had our little princess 3 weeks ago and it’s been awesome. You should Really appreciate your wife or girlfriend especially if they are home by themselves with the baby while you’re at work with no help. Tell her you love her every chance you get and get her flowers or something let them no that they are really appreciated and she is doing a great job. There emotions are running rapid and a newborn can be too much for them if they are home by themselves for 8 hours while you’re at work. If you can take off work good do that they need all the help they can get, I couldn’t take off work for long the bills are due and need to be paid so I have to do what I have to do.

I always leave work early as possible to see the baby and the wife. I can't wait for the baby to smile when she is happy and not by accident lol my baby cracks up in her sleep sometimes but can't get her to smile when she’s awake. I am trying not to spoil her and my wife is too but it’s so hard they are so small and innocent. I am at work right not wishing I was home with my wife and my little girl. I really wanted a boy, I love football, basketball I wanted too play ball with them and everything but I tell you this I wouldn’t trade her in for the word she is PERFECT.

Eh- You're way to positive for having a 3 week old. I have a 1 month old (my 2nd. I already have 3 year old). She doesn't sleep on any kind of scheduele. Pretty much insist on eating every 2 hours. Screams (and I mean out right SCREAMS) from about 8-11 every night unless she's eating. Doesn't matter what you do she screams. And is generally grumpy the rest of the day. Never can put her down for a more than 10 minutes w/o some screaming.

My 3 year old was the opposite. Once, she didn't cry for so long we called my mom to ask if she thought there might be something wrong.

[PeterMP]

Thank you again for acknowledgement rating of the thread.

I've taken off for one and half week to attend to her needs as well as the babies. Her sister has been here to help during this tiring course (possibly why I feel left out sometimes but most appreciated for her help). We absolutely would've been in wonderland without her sister's support.

I adore my son and everything that he is shaping out to be. But, there is a question... does a father take a step back from the newborns to let the mother's spend their desirable times with them from breastfeeding, diaper changing and etc.

Reminder: I have put in my fair share with the pamper duties as well.

Well, you can't breast feed so there you have the mother has to do that, but I always then try and compensate for everything else. I shower in the morning while my month old eats, but then I take her the rest of the morning as I get ready. She sits for a while, and then she gets grumpy and I hold her. Calm her down, put her back down, and repeat.

[Mooney]

Screams (and I mean out right SCREAMS) from about 8-11 every night unless she's eating. Doesn't matter what you do she screams. And is generally grumpy the rest of the day. Never can put her down for a more than 10 minutes w/o some screaming.

My youngest, now 10, was like this. We put him in a baby rocker, and I would rock him for hours at night. Only thing that worked. Good luck!

[WhoRUSupposed2Be]

Eh- You're way to positive for having a 3 week old. I have a 1 month old (my 2nd. I already have 3 year old). She doesn't sleep on any kind of scheduele. Pretty much insist on eating every 2 hours. Screams (and I mean out right SCREAMS) from about 8-11 every night unless she's eating. Doesn't matter what you do she screams. And is generally grumpy the rest of the day. Never can put her down for a more than 10 minutes w/o some screaming.

My 3 year old was the opposite. Once, she didn't cry for so long we called my mom to ask if she thought there might be something wrong.

Well, I know my fiancee's niece is pretty much everything that you described but in a 2 yr. old sense. She is very active and loves to be domineering at times (taking food and acting out to attract attention).

Her mother had to buy a book for self-determined children and I keep asking her "If the book has been of any help."

But, parents have to be careful when it comes to strong-willed children because they tend try their luck every once in a while.

[WhoRUSupposed2Be]

Eh- You're way to positive for having a 3 week old. I have a 1 month old (my 2nd. I already have 3 year old). She doesn't sleep on any kind of scheduele. Pretty much insist on eating every 2 hours. Screams (and I mean out right SCREAMS) from about 8-11 every night unless she's eating. Doesn't matter what you do she screams. And is generally grumpy the rest of the day. Never can put her down for a more than 10 minutes w/o some screaming.

My 3 year old was the opposite. Once, she didn't cry for so long we called my mom to ask if she thought there might be something wrong.

Well, children are usually an off-breed to their parents (it's all genetics).

[Califan007 The Constipated]

Second this, every book out there pretty much says the same thing. Crying is the only way a infant can communicate with you. While I agree with letting a baby cry itself to sleep when the time is right, that usually isn't for several months, read up on it before actually doing it.

Nobody ever said do it from day one lol...but you WILL find an abundance of info on how your child needs to learn both to comfort itself back to sleep instead of always depending on you for that comfort, as well as learning that the ENTIRE night is sleep time. If you keep going in there everytime your child cries at night it will learn neither of these things.

[SiCkSoULjA]

Eh- You're way to positive for having a 3 week old. I have a 1 month old (my 2nd. I already have 3 year old). She doesn't sleep on any kind of scheduele. Pretty much insist on eating every 2 hours. Screams (and I mean out right SCREAMS) from about 8-11 every night unless she's eating. Doesn't matter what you do she screams. And is generally grumpy the rest of the day. Never can put her down for a more than 10 minutes w/o some screaming.

My 3 year old was the opposite. Once, she didn't cry for so long we called my mom to ask if she thought there might be something wrong.

sounds like you got it rough, my girl eats every 2 to 3 hours depends on if she was breast fed or bottle, if bottle she usually weaks up 3-4 hours Breast fed every 2 hours. I heard sometimes if they ate and been changed sometimes you have to sit there and let them cry, they will usually cry themselves to sleep in 5 to 10 minutes.

She almost always sleep in the bed with us I am pretty sure we are going to pay for that later on when we try to get her into her bed but for right now she sleeps very well with us.

[Califan007 The Constipated]

Another piece of advice, although this is for when they're older (like around 3 or 4)...if you only have one child do NOT always involve the child in all of your activities, and do NOT always involve yourself in all of the child's playtime. A lot of first time parents will do both, but it's important for the child to not see you as playmates, or to see all of your activities as "husband and wife" as part of THEIR activities as well...when you have several kids this doesn't really become an issue because they become each other's playmates. But parents of an "only child" often give themselves over too much to being their child's playmate. Obviously you DO want to play with them (and when you do, it's heaven :yes: )...just try and not insert yourself into their playtime too much. Children, for the most part, only need to know you're there...that they can look over once and awhile while playing and see mom and dad....if they can, they'll feel safe and secure. They don't need us parents always playing blocks with them or always coloring with them or always joining in to try and make things more fun for them. Definitely let them know they have their time, and you and your wife have your time.

[BigMike619]

when i was a baby and i passed this down with my son, when he would be crying in his crib i would pat hm on the butt in a slow steady rhythm and he would fall right asleep.

[Dictator]

But, there is a question... does a father take a step back from the newborns to let the mother's spend their desirable times with them from breastfeeding, diaper changing and etc.

You don't have to take a step back. She cam pump and store milk in the fridge. Take the initiative and bring that up if she isn't already.

[MEANDWARF]

You'll lose energy fast.

But its fun.

Congrads!