PF Chang Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 Ah, the delight of the American-made Chinese fortune cookie. Most of the time, they're not even fortunes. What are some weird/funny/Engrish "fortunes" you've received? Weird: You will live a long life and eat many fortune cookies. Some men dream of fortunes, others dream of cookies. Come back later...I am sleeping. (yes, cookies need their sleep too) Engrish: Your possess exceptional commanding and leadership ability. Eat your vegetable and you'll grow up big and strong like Popeye. Tip-mongering: A small donation is called for. It's the right thing to do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oriolesfan93p Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 One of my all time favorites... this one was a little on the weird side.... "You Look Pretty." First off I am a guy so that was a little weird, second, How the hell do they know....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WVUforREDSKINS Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 I had one that said "you will get a new pair of shoes." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WVUforREDSKINS Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 I had one that said "you will get a new pair of shoes." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riggo-toni Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 "You will be imprisoned following the testimony of a sexy 17 year old girl with large breasts." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TorresA Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 There is one I got that was so good I kept. A tub and rub will change your day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SkinsOrlando Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 It's legal in Thaliand. Always thought that was an odd one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PF Chang Posted August 8, 2007 Author Share Posted August 8, 2007 Hm...started this thread as I was eating Chinese for lunch...fortune cookie was "A carrot a day...may keep cancer away." Huh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nace14 Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 i've received: "You will make a good lawyer." four different times. funny how i'm in law school. if a potential client ever asks me if i'm good, i'm jsut gonna say, "Do fortune cookies lie?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoGood28 Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 I was eating chinese food in my living room with my Bro when I opened: "Your brother is watching TV" WEIRD. No joke. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roadkill Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 Once got one that said: "Wooh! Glad I'm out of that cookie." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AsburySkinsFan Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 My all time fav: "You're meal is on the house" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Corcaigh Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 I got "That wasn't chicken". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mrdoctor Posted August 8, 2007 Share Posted August 8, 2007 "You will be imprisoned following the testimony of a sexy 17 year old girl with large breasts." thats pretty precise.. scary Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PF Chang Posted August 9, 2007 Author Share Posted August 9, 2007 I got "That wasn't chicken". Ah, yes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redsand521 Posted August 9, 2007 Share Posted August 9, 2007 Look out behind you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enter Apotheosis Posted August 9, 2007 Share Posted August 9, 2007 "Obey the fortune cookie, disregard all other fortune telling devices." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Titaw Posted August 9, 2007 Share Posted August 9, 2007 "Never smell the inside of another mans hat" WTF!? Thanks, :obvious: Always wanted to use that one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
techboy Posted August 9, 2007 Share Posted August 9, 2007 "Help me. I am being held against my will in a fortune cookie factory." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Sassy Molassy Posted August 9, 2007 Share Posted August 9, 2007 "It tastes sweet." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gbear Posted August 9, 2007 Share Posted August 9, 2007 I just hate that they changed what is said in most fortune cookies. 10 years ago in college, we could always add "in bed" to the end of every fortune cookie and it would make a sort of twisted sense. Then we'd go around the table looking for the most fun fortune. It was even more fun to later try to make the fortune come true. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chump Bailey Posted August 9, 2007 Share Posted August 9, 2007 I pissed in your combination fried rice...:paranoid: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted August 9, 2007 Share Posted August 9, 2007 The best one I ever got was "Disregard all previous fortunes." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AsburySkinsFan Posted August 10, 2007 Share Posted August 10, 2007 Ok, no joke, I just got these tonight, lets just say that it had me a bit curious on the way home. "It's over your head now. Time to get some professional help." "Watch out for little problems could get a lot bigger." "Your problem just got bigger. Think, what have you done?" "You laugh now, wait till you get home." I can provide scans for the doubters. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PF Chang Posted August 10, 2007 Author Share Posted August 10, 2007 Ok, no joke, I just got these tonight, lets just say that it had me a bit curious on the way home."It's over your head now. Time to get some professional help." "Watch out for little problems could get a lot bigger." "Your problem just got bigger. Think, what have you done?" "You laugh now, wait till you get home." I can provide scans for the doubters. Man. They used to be positive. What is this world coming to? Think I might have to drop by the Chinese buffet tomorrow. Hopefully no gloom and doom predictions from the cookie gods. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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