Teller Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Ask honorary_hog. He's from West Virginia.How does blonde hair make women more gullible and stupid? Hey! That's ****ed up! Besides, I'm a transplant...:nana: Anyway... Did you know in Maryland it is actually legal to marry your second cousin? In West Virginia it's not. You tell me which state is bassackwards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
praise_gibbs Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 They'd assume the guy was looking for a different kind of service, and politely direct him to the nearest brothel.People say Peyton Manning is this generation's Dan Marino (can't win the big one). Bill Cowher has been to five AFC championship games and now two Super Bowls. If he loses this one, is he this generation's Dan Reeves or Marv Levy? Nope because he has a moustache! If a ram is a sheep and a donkey is an ass, then why is a ram in the ass a goose? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teller Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Nope because he has a moustache!If a ram is a sheep and a donkey is an ass, then why is a ram in the ass a goose? :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: That's great...But um, in Englad, it's a guy named Roger. If you need 10 yards for a first down, why so great about getting "the whole nine yards?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
praise_gibbs Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: That's great...But um, in Englad, it's a guy named Roger. If you need 10 yards for a first down, why so great about getting "the whole nine yards?" Beats me.. have you noticed when a team needs 5 or whatever number of yards for the first they pass the ball atleast 2 or 3 yards shorter than the marker. Why aren't french fries and popcorn considered vegetables when they're just cooked potatoes and corn? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dfitzo53 Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Beats me.. have you noticed when a team needs 5 or whatever number of yards for the first they pass the ball atleast 2 or 3 yards shorter than the marker.Why aren't french fries and popcorn considered vegetables when they're just cooked potatoes and corn? Because they taste good. If a fish is on a boat, does he get seasick or airsick? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
georgiaredskin Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Because they taste good.If a fish is on a boat, does he get seasick or airsick? Easy. Airsick. If a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle, does a bicycle need a fish like a man needs a woman? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
herrmag Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Because they taste good.If a fish is on a boat, does he get seasick or airsick? Neither. He gets dead. If a blind man is screaming "did you see that?", what do you say to him? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dfitzo53 Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Easy. Airsick.If a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle, does a bicycle need a fish like a man needs a woman? I think that depends on the gender of both fish and bicycle. Why do I only have trouble finding my lighter when I need it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
georgiaredskin Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 I think that depends on the gender of both fish and bicycle.Why do I only have trouble finding my lighter when I need it? :laugh: Because lighters can sense when you need them and hence disappear. Why do fat women wear tank tops that let their belly hang out when you can't even see the belly button ring under so much flab? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
praise_gibbs Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 I think that depends on the gender of both fish and bicycle.Why do I only have trouble finding my lighter when I need it? Because it is always in the LAST place you look. Little babies use shampoos that don't sting the eyes. Now that's understandable since they're babies and don't know to prevent the shampoo from entering the eyes. However, once we grow up, we stop using that shampoo and start using one that does sting the eyes. WHY ? Why do we, as adults deserve to have stinging eyes ? Why not use the no-tear formula for every shampoo ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mooka Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 If a blind man is screaming "did you see that?", what do you say to him? Hey buddy, how do you know if your done wiping?Little babies use shampoos that don't sting the eyes. Now that's understandable since they're babies and don't know to prevent the shampoo from entering the eyes. However, once we grow up, we stop using that shampoo and start using one that does sting the eyes. WHY ? Why do we, as adults deserve to have stinging eyes ? Why not use the no-tear formula for every shampoo ? because you shouldn't be a baby and cry about it.How come when I add stuff to my burger it costs extra but its not any cheaper to take stuff off? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dfitzo53 Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Hey buddy, how do you know if your done wiping? because you shouldn't be a baby and cry about it. How come when I add stuff to my burger it costs extra but its not any cheaper to take stuff off? The effort of changing the order counters the reduced price of the ingredients. Why can't I ever feel full after eating Chinese food? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheREALJBird Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Why did Brokeback Mountain win so many damn awards??? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
praise_gibbs Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 The effort of changing the order counters the reduced price of the ingredients.Why can't I ever feel full after eating Chinese food? Well you are eating cat and dog when you eat Siamese food. My dog can just eat and eat and never get full. If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he naked or homeless? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jrockster21 Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Well you are eating cat and dog when you eat Siamese food. My dog can just eat and eat and never get full.If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he naked or homeless? A turtle without a shell is dead. How do we know a horse is a zebra without stripes?? What if a zebra is a horse with stripes! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teller Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Well you are eating cat and dog when you eat Siamese food. My dog can just eat and eat and never get full.If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he naked or homeless? Yes. I can ask this because I live in WV. If a husband and wife in WV get a divorce, are they still legally brother and sister? :doh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dfitzo53 Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Yes.I can ask this because I live in WV. If a husband and wife in WV get a divorce, are they still legally brother and sister? :doh: Of course. If a brother disowns his sister, are they still married? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teller Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 A turtle without a shell is dead.How do we know a horse is a zebra without stripes?? What if a zebra is a horse with stripes! Honestly jrock, I taught my 3-year old the word "horsey." I figured it was easier than, "Look honey, there's a zebra without stripes!" :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teller Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Of course.If a brother disowns his sister, are they still married? Well, what I did was shoot 'er, and then I went out in the back yerd an' dug me a hole...I mean...nevermind. Stealing from your sig: If the Golden Rule applies in all cases, "Do unto others as you'd have them do unto you." Does that give me the right to grope any hot chick as I see fit? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dfitzo53 Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Well, what I did was shoot 'er, and then I went out in the back yerd an' dug me a hole...I mean...nevermind. Stealing from your sig: If the Golden Rule applies in all cases, "Do unto others as you'd have them do unto you." Does that give me the right to grope any hot chick as I see fit? You're really supposed to obey the spirit of the rules over the letter, but who am I to stop your fun? I wouldn't want you to stop mine. How can flammable and inflammable possibly mean the same thing? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
herrmag Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Well, what I did was shoot 'er, and then I went out in the back yerd an' dug me a hole...I mean...nevermind. Stealing from your sig: If the Golden Rule applies in all cases, "Do unto others as you'd have them do unto you." Does that give me the right to grope any hot chick as I see fit? Yes. And post the story If a toad fish is a fish, what does that make a toad that swims? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
herrmag Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 You're really supposed to obey the spirit of the rules over the letter, but who am I to stop your fun? I wouldn't want you to stop mine.How can flammable and inflammable possibly mean the same thing? Light yourself on fire in an inflammable jacket and there's your answer. How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll pop if the tootsie roll pop is buried in cement? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coach Williams Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 less than 100 Because the cement is still wet......:puke: When am I going to lose this avatar? No seriously...lol.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Teller Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 Yes. And post the story If a toad fish is a fish, what does that make a toad that swims? A tadpole. Is King Brice's avatar actually him? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dfitzo53 Posted January 30, 2006 Share Posted January 30, 2006 less than 100 Because the cement is still wet......:puke:When am I going to lose this avatar? No seriously...lol.... Clearly when you're funny. If you've got a pointer/retriever mix, what does it do when you throw a stick? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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