gbear Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 Lol. http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/achenblog/post/why-men-should-fear-babies/2011/09/14/gIQAMtNDUK_blog.html?hpid=z3 --------------------------------- The alarming story linking child-rearing with decreasing testosterone in men isn’t a surprise for those of us who have already survived the emasculating trials of parenting. We knew, already, that babies were like Kryptonite. We learned to be in the other room when the howling began, when the little need-machines began stamping their feet and demanding sustenance. My wife would say to me, “It’s your turn to change the diaper,” and I’d just look at her silently, and then finally say, “You seem to have confused me with someone else.” I’ve tried to teach other men the magic of maintaining their true manly selves in the face of the feminizing forces of child-rearing. Like, you don’t want to hold a baby unless you do so as if the child were a football. Obliviousness is a critical tool. When the wife says, “Get the baby,” you need to say, “What baby?” Also refer to the baby as “it.” That helps establish distance. As in, ”I think it wants its mother.” ------------------------------- rest at link. Vrooom Vroom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Predicto Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 We fear the baby because once they arrive, the baby gets the titties, not us. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gbear Posted September 15, 2011 Author Share Posted September 15, 2011 Yes, What's more, no matter what we do, not only have we lost the attention of our wives, we will henceforth be known as "So and so's dad." Just run back 3 td's in the Super Bowl, doesn't matter. To everyone in your circle of aquaintences, the comment will be "Did you see so and so's dad run back 3 td's in the Super Bowl?" The kick in the nuts will be when the other three dads in the room look up and say "When was that? Did I miss it again?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 http://www.somethingawful.com/flash/shmorky/babby.swf Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Destino Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 My wife and I haven't had kids yet but what I've noticed about the couples we know that have children is alarming. There isn't a single couple in which the male hasn't been entirely relegated to an after thought in his own family. If he works late he's an *******. If he wants to go work out he's choosing to be away from his family. I wonder if this is just an American thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Predicto Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 http://www.somethingawful.com/flash/shmorky/babby.swf Oh shmorky. Half the internet was created by that guy. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twa Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 My wife and I haven't had kids yet but what I've noticed about the couples we know that have children is alarming. There isn't a single couple in which the male hasn't been entirely relegated to an after thought in his own family. I wonder if this is an American thing. If he works late he's an *******. If he wants to go work out he's choosing to be away from his family. I wonder if this is just an American thing. I've noticed that to a degree,and the kid certainly tends to become the woman's priority. That said most men do duck out on sharing the child raising duties. Predicto....I would swear my son would tease me over the titty rights....just cut the playing crap and eat ya little ****. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rictus58 Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 I don't feel emasculated at all by having a daughter. I love her more than anything else. Even my wife. And she'd say the same thing. But as all parents know, it's a vastly different kind. I'd do absolutely anything for my daughter. I've actively worked towards making sure I'm #1 in her life. Selfish I know. But I don't care. She's MY daughter. She is my own Mini-me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twa Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 Baby girl has ya wrapped around her finger....not that theirs anything wrong with that.:cool: It is kinda amazing how they become more important than either of you....in a good way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stew Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 Awww man.... my wife is eleven weeks right now... Its our first. Im starting to get scared. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rictus58 Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 Awww man.... my wife is eleven weeks right now... Its our first. Im starting to get scared. There's nothing to be scared of. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Predicto Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 There's nothing to be scared of. Yah, you can live for years without getting any.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Destructis Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 I don't feel emasculated at all by having a daughter. I love her more than anything else. Even my wife. And she'd say the same thing. But as all parents know, it's a vastly different kind. I'd do absolutely anything for my daughter. I've actively worked towards making sure I'm #1 in her life. Selfish I know. But I don't care. She's MY daughter. She is my own Mini-me If you know any guys who are jerks to women and lie to them to get them into bed, wait until they have a daughter. They quit doing it pretty quickly. If you want to lose your sex drive, just remember that one day your daughter will grow up and have sex. The last note to remember is that after you have a daughter, you will understand all of the fathers who threaten the guy who picks up their daughters for a date. You also laugh about the father who is cleaning his gun when you pick her up. When you are the guy picking her up, you figure it's just for show. You realize after you have a daughter, he wouldn't have hesitated to use it if you had hurt his daughter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ancalagon the Black Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 My wife and I haven't had kids yet but what I've noticed about the couples we know that have children is alarming. There isn't a single couple in which the male hasn't been entirely relegated to an after thought in his own family. If he works late he's an *******. If he wants to go work out he's choosing to be away from his family. I wonder if this is just an American thing. I'm not sure what your point about being an afterthought has to do with your point about being vilified for working too much - they seem unrelated. I do remember reading a study that indicated that the more families share parenting duties, the happier the families are, but i can't find a link. I'll keep looking. But I do agree with you that there are many families that are struggling with the work-life balance thing. And i think it's particularly pronounced in the USA where people work incredibly long hours and take no vacation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Destructis Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 Yah, you can live for years without getting any.... Not necessarily. I felt guilty once because I cheated on my right hand with my left. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riggo-toni Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 Thank heaven for vasectomies! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Destructis Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 Thank heaven for vasectomies! Yeah but when they say it doesn't hurt....THEY LIE!!!!!!!!! Still worth the pain though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Henry Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 Maybe not quite safe for work ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PCS Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 Awww man.... my wife is eleven weeks right now... Its our first. Im starting to get scared. There you are. At the gym,ready to lift some weights. Maybe at a park somewhere ready for a pickup game. Outdoor court ready to play some hoops. One of those or some other similar situation. You're around you boys ready for some man time. Got your workout or favorite,somewhat tattered,go out play shirt on and you can feel the testosterone building. Oh yeah. You've been waiting for this. Mom and the kid at home and your time,however brief it is this day,is yours. You take off your shoes and go to put on the game/workout wheels on and the ................stop putting one on. You reach in and pull out the little plastic baby toy,look at it,then put it with your other stuff. While you do that,finish putting on the shoes,and head,(somewhat sheepishly),to the gym,field,court,whatever,the smiles and chuckles from the all the guys chase the "Mr. Mooooom"'s coming from their mouths. Be scared. Be very scared. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stew Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 Yah, you can live for years without getting any.... Im honestly worried about saving money, providing my child with what they will need, making sure my child is healthy and happy... I guess its kind of a fear of the unknown. Im not used to not knowing what to expect. As for the sex..... My wife has had constant nausea/morning sickness, and when she isn't sick, she is irritable and sore and I can already see the beginning of the end of the sexlife. I think I just passed the "Road Ends up ahead" sign. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Destructis Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 I joke a lot about it, but I honestly wouldn't trade either of my kids for anything. The coolest thing in the world is having a discussion about the Skins with your 20 year old son. I cherish those moments. As a kid, when I did that my dad, it never occured to me how much he probably enjoyed that until I did it with my son. If I could time travel, I would go back and have a few more of those conversations. ---------- Post added September-15th-2011 at 04:37 PM ---------- As for the sex..... My wife has had constant nausea/morning sickness, and when she isn't sick, she is irritable and sore and I can already see the beginning of the end of the sexlife. I think I just passed the "Road Ends up ahead" sign. Seriously, the sickness goes away. When that happens watch out. I would come home from work and get jumped. I remember some days just being to tired when I got home and she would say..."Then just lay there and let me do all the work". After the kid is born, that goes away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stew Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 ISeriously, the sickness goes away. When that happens watch out. I would come home from work and get jumped. I remember some days just being to tired when I got home and she would say..."Then just lay there and let me do all the work". After reading this I was like After the kid is born, that goes away. Then I read this and was like Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bird_1972 Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 After the kid is born, that goes away. Wow ... is this hyperbole or should every father expect to never have sex again once their kids are born? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Henry Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 Wow ... is this hyperbole or should every father expect to never have sex again once their kids are born? The word 'kids' should answer that question. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
endzone_dave Posted September 15, 2011 Share Posted September 15, 2011 I'm not sure what your point about being an afterthought has to do with your point about being vilified for working too much - they seem unrelated.I do remember reading a study that indicated that the more families share parenting duties, the happier the families are, but i can't find a link. I'll keep looking. But I do agree with you that there are many families that are struggling with the work-life balance thing. And i think it's particularly pronounced in the USA where people work incredibly long hours and take no vacation. That pretty much sums it up for my wife and me. We each work 50-55 hours per week and have a 9 and 5 year old. Life is a complete rat race but we make damn sure the kids get the attention they need. Just doesn't leave much time for ourselves. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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