Yahoo: Jilted ex-boyfriend puts up abortion billboard

[Destino]

How about a compromise that says your not allowed to kill the baby unless both parents agree to killing the baby?

The entire goal of the reproductive rights movement was to grant access to birth control, education, and abortion to women precisely so the males would not be allowed to decide if and when they should have children. That the choice belonged entirely in the hands of the women who had to carry the baby to term.

[Kosher Ham]

Health records are confidential. Abortion is a medical procedure. Revealing her medical history is a violation of privacy.

I'm not sure where I stand on this freedom of speech vs invasion of privacy, but it sure is an icky thing to do.

Not for anyone besides a health provider.

It's free speech yet, in bad taste.

HH, Men have the right to wear a condom, women have the right to use their own birth control. If you choose not to use those, than a conversation needs to happen... before this would ever happen.

---------- Post added June-7th-2011 at 10:41 AM ----------

Bolded part absolutely true.

Again, I know it's tough to grasp, but only one person is expected to donate their body for nine months.

Once he's born, then both of them can, and should, be equally responsible. Raising a child is an obligation upon both parents. (And, hopefully, lots of others, too.)

But the burdens of pregnancy fall solely upon one person. (Unless you consider late night munchie runs to be half of the burden.)

Looks like you are speaking out of both sides.

A child should never fall on one person. Both involved have resposibility.

Never.

[Teller]

HH, I know you feel you've been screwed by Family courts in the past. But if a man isn't willing to support a child he helped create, he needs to keep it locked up or double wrapped. If he wants to father a child, he needs to find a woman who shares the same thoughts.

Assure me that women never change their minds, nor behave vindictively and we have a deal.

Yes, my personal experience HEAVILY influences my opinion in this area. I've never shied away from that. I just think that either both parents should bare responsibility, or neither should. And frankly the incubator argument doesn't move me. She knows what her body is capable of when she has unprotected sex.

[rictus58]

Assure me that women never change their minds, nor behave vindictively and we have a deal.

Yes, my personal experience HEAVILY influences my opinion in this area. I've never shied away from that. I just think that either both parents should bare responsibility, or neither should. And frankly the incubator argument doesn't move me. She knows what her body is capable of when she has unprotected sex.

And it's her body. Her choice.

Assure me men never change their mind nor behave vindictively and we have a deal. A man can just as easily change his mind 7 months after he "made" her keep the baby.

If she choses to keep a baby a man doesn't want, they both still share the responsibility. The man's is more of a financial role.

And yes, the woman is equally as aware of protection against pregnancy. However, in our society, it's also her right to handle the pregnancy as she sees fit. Not yours.

If you don't want a kid, it's up to you to stop it from happening.

If you don't want your car stolen, do you leave it running with the keys in the ignition or do you take them out and lock the door?

[Teller]

If you don't want a kid, it's up to you to stop it from happening.

If you don't want your car stolen, do you leave it running with the keys in the ignition or do you take them out and lock the door?

Ohhhh.....So I'm supposed to take preventative measures? Makes perfect sense. I just wish you'd apply that rationale consistently.

[DCsportsfan53]

I am sure TWA also would be okay if the woman had a billboard with all his faults and short comings and mistakes made posted for all to see

She can start with how he is a fornicator also

---------- Post added June-7th-2011 at 08:38 AM ----------

Maybe he should have married her first and then planned for a child instead of getting her pregnant out of wed lock

I love how it's the man's responsibility not to fornicate her and knock her up out of wedlock and it's his responsibility to care for that child for life once it's born but he has no input into whether or not it's born in the first place.

[rictus58]

Ohhhh.....So I'm supposed to take preventative measures? Makes perfect sense. I just wish you'd apply that rationale consistently.

YES! YOU ARE! IF YOU DO NOT WANT A KID!

Like it or not, an aborition is a preventative measure against kids. Like it or not, it occurs after the act. Like it or not, you cannot force a woman into an abortion anymore than I can force you to shave your back.

You know the risks of your actions before hand. You deal with the results. Nobody makes you ride without protection. Everything else is just "poor male american me" gibberish.

You want to talk about the injustice of alimony or child visitation? Im all ears.

If you want to promote this cause that you can:

a) father a child and sign away parental rights at the drop of a hat.

or

force a woman to carry a baby to term she doesn't want.

Then you will rightfully be dismissed as a jerk.

---------- Post added June-7th-2011 at 11:21 AM ----------

I love how it's the man's responsibility not to fornicate her and knock her up out of wedlock and it's his responsibility to care for that child for life once it's born but he has no input into whether or not it's born in the first place.

Maybe if this were drilled into every young mans head from the second they hit puberty, it wouldn't be that much of a problem.

[mcsluggo]

I still think allowing "male abortions" would solve much of the unwanted-pregnancy problem. Simply allow fathers the choice to be a parent, or sign over all parental rights and all responsibilties to the mother if he doesn't want the child.

frankly it is hard to buy into your longstanding statements of fathers systematically being screwed over by the courts when you post this sort of dreck. THIS is just simply plain and simple weak-assed evasion of responsibility. it is pathetic, and it casts ALL of what you write on the subject of parental responsibilities/rights/alimony etc... in a very unfavorable light.

[Pwyl]

Bolded part absolutely true.

Again, I know it's tough to grasp, but only one person is expected to donate their body for nine months.

Once he's born, then both of them can, and should, be equally responsible. Raising a child is an obligation upon both parents. (And, hopefully, lots of others, too.)

But the burdens of pregnancy fall solely upon one person. (Unless you consider late night munchie runs to be half of the burden.)

Interesting, so it's absolutely true, and then you explain how it's not. Even in your two-phase distinction between carrying the child and raising the child, the father is not unaffected because he is responsible for supporting the mother to some extent during the pregnancy.

The only reason I pulled that quote out and disagree is that you can't have an honest discussion about how responsibilty and rights should be divided when you start with the assumption that one party is completely unaffected by the outcome(s) of the decision.

And I know it's hard to grasp, but in any situation where the outcome of a decision node could cause me to be financially obligated for the next 18 years, I want to have a say. (for the record, I would be adamantly against the abortion and personally would support the child)

[panel]

Lets stop the printing of all the tell all books in the world, because they invade other people's privacy. It doesn't matter if the things in the book affected the author, or if they are true, but if they invade their "privacy", they must be silenced.

[NavyDave]

I wonder how this thread would look if the woman said she aborted her child because there was a very good chance it was going to be gay?

Would people who are pro abortion be so willing to give her a pass then?

[panel]

Bolded part absolutely true.

Again, I know it's tough to grasp, but only one person is expected to donate their body for nine months.

The unborn is also trapped and donating their body for 9 months

[Burgold]

I may not look at it the same way if he put a picture of her and said "She killed my baby". But it looks like he didn't name her at all right?

Yeah, that is a big difference. I was talking about the generic issue, but I will take my lumps on this one.

[Teller]

frankly it is hard to buy into your longstanding statements of fathers systematically being screwed over by the courts when you post this sort of dreck. THIS is just simply plain and simple weak-assed evasion of responsibility. it is pathetic, and it casts ALL of what you write on the subject of parental responsibilities/rights/alimony etc... in a very unfavorable light.

And that's fine. I hope you have the same view of women who cast off their responsibility as well, after the act.

[mcsluggo]

I wonder how this thread would look if the woman said she aborted her child because there was a very good chance it was going to be gay?

Would people who are pro abortion be so willing to give her a pass then?

show me the person that is "pro-abortion". THere is basically no situation where abortion isn't sad or tragic... trying to throw "gothca" jibes into it is just sad and cheap.

---------- Post added June-7th-2011 at 03:53 PM ----------

And that's fine. I hope you have the same view of women who cast off their responsibility as well, after the act.

cast off their responsibility in what way?

(don't you worry.. there is PLENTY of room for scorn and finger wagging in my sanctimoniuous world!)

[GibbsFactor]

I think you don't understand where HH is coming from.

If a man gets a woman pregnant then he is completely powerless and she can do whatever she wants without his consent up to and including hiring someone to kill his baby before it is born.

If he wants to hire the person to kill his baby before it is born and she doesn't want that then he cannot force it to happen. Even though he wanted an out by killing his baby, if she has the baby instead then he is on the hook for child support for the next 18 years.

Yep.

I'm glad he did this. If anything, it brings to the forefront how powerless fathers are, yet they are expected to pony up. Two way street.

[panel]

The boyfriend has no doctor/patient relationship with the girlfriend. He is not a "covered entity" and, thus, is free to reveal this information about her.

Do you also think it should be illegal for a book to reveal who has used steroids and who hasn't? Couldn't they claim what they did with their medical trainers is privet, so no one can talk about it?

[GibbsFactor]

Unfortunately for your political crusade, reality isn't equal, in this case.

It may come as a shock to you, but women get pregnant, and men don't.

And? What's the point of that? Two people got laid. If the man wants the abortion and the lady doesn't, what's going to happen? The man is on the hook for 18 years. If the woman wants an abortion and the man doesn't, the man has his child killed.

Stand up for your own sex once in a while, no one will label you a sexist.

[mcsluggo]

Stand up for your own sex once in a while, no one will label you a sexist.

do you really think it is a war... that will be won by one of the sides? really?

there inherently is NO equality in the situation of prgnancy. there simply is no way around that fact.. period.

[sportjunkie07]

there are so many replies that i disagree with in this thread that im not going to respond to one directly.

childraising should not be one sided, its equal. so at this point, women have all say in whether they want to have the baby or not. if they decide not to, the male has no opinion. if they decide to have the baby, the male is bound by law to support the baby through the first 18 years of its life. tell me how much sense that makes.

so right now, women have much more say in this arena. yet to give more power to males would also be unfair, because having children should lay equal responsibility on the mother and father.

the only clear answer here is dont have sex before marriage. i know its not the popular opinion, but it prevent such cases from ever happening.

as for the story in the OP, i agree with the male.

[PeterMP]

there are so many replies that i disagree with in this thread that im not going to respond to one directly.

childraising should not be one sided, its equal. so at this point, women have all say in whether they want to have the baby or not. if they decide not to, the male has no opinion. if they decide to have the baby, the male is bound by law to support the baby through the first 18 years of its life. tell me how much sense that makes.

so right now, women have much more say in this arena. yet to give more power to males would also be unfair, because having children should lay equal responsibility on the mother and father.

It is fair because it isn't true. Up until conception man have plenty of say about whether they want to have a baby.

[sportjunkie07]

It is fair because it isn't true. Up until conception man have plenty of say about whether they want to have a baby.

yeah, but that isnt the case now.

[GibbsFactor]

i am sorry.. but you sound like a moron here. really.

Nah, I'm a father of three and have 33 years experience in life. You, tossing out verbiage and language to insult shows your lack of wisdom. Seriously. This ain't math we are discussing.

It would appear to me that many in this thread that are arguing for the woman's right have never found themselves personally involved in similar situations.

Here's a news nugget for you sluggo. It is now more common for children to be born out of wedlock. When this happens, the father has far less rights then the mother. Now, I understand this "policy" is due to years of men not owing up to their responsibility. The mother has no choice. That's not what is being argued here. What is being argued here is that unless the man can convince the woman into his way of thinking, he has no right or choice. Sure, he impregnated the woman, but why should the woman get 100% of the decision power? Hardly seems equal. And isn't that what we are striving for? Equality?

Years of wrong should not be righted by a law that is written under the guise of equality when in reality it is punishment for more uncivilized times. I believe most men want to own up to their responsibility. For me, I guess this hits hard due to my belief that the pendulum has swayed too far in the woman's direction. Deciding to abort or keep your unexpected child is a decision I wish on no one. But that decision must be made in today's society. It's a pity the man has no legal say. That's the argument. Is it really that moronic?

[visionary]

It is fair because it isn't true. Up until conception man have plenty of say about whether they want to have a baby.

What if the man is tricked or forced into having sex, the woman uses him to get a baby, or lies about using birth control?

[GibbsFactor]

What if the man is tricked or forced into having sex, the woman uses him to get a baby, or lies about using birth control?

Well he should not have in her, regardless of what technique was being used... That's the point PeterMP is making. Too bad that means nothing since pulling out or covering up doesn't seem to work. If it did we wouldn't be having this conversation.