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Could you fall in love with a person over the internet/phone?


Slateman

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It would be a foolish proposition. Most people, in face to face relationships, are on their best behavior for 6 months to a year. That period could be indefinite otherwise and you have no way of verifying if that person is being honest about anything. I've heard nothing but horror stories about long distance internet romances. My HS friend, in AL go duped into marrying someone that he "met" over the net. She fooled him into thinking that she was financially independent with a govt. pension. She moved in to a house he built years before they met, married him and tried to take the house 6 months later with a divorce attorney.

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Since I gave my smartass response, I'll give a more serious opinioin...

I don't think you can "fall in love" with someone you've never met.

However, I do think it's possible to somewhat develop and and plant the seed for a relationship through e-mail, IM, phone, etc, IF you have met and hung out w/ the person before. But I can't imagine saying I loved someone I never actually met.

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Since I gave my smartass response, I'll give a more serious opinioin...

I don't think you can "fall in love" with someone you've never met.

However, I do think it's possible to somewhat develop and and plant the seed for a relationship through e-mail, IM, phone, etc, IF you have met and hung out w/ the person before. But I can't imagine saying I loved someone I never actually met.

See - if you read between the lines, this explains why she cleverly avoided us at Canton :silly:
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Met my wife online playing EverQuest. My wife and I were friends for a few years talking like every night before we actually met in person. I've known quite a few people who met through EQ who got married and are still going strong.

Like others posted though, it's more of a building a foundation meeting there. You get a lot of the details out of the way. You never truly fall in love until you start meeting them in person though.

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Not embarrassed to admit it, the thing is that things have not gone well for quite a while now, and before we got married we had a lot of people against us saying that it wouldn't work out, that we were too young and that we were going too fast (we only "dated" 9 months before getting married). We never listened, we kept saying that people needed to "update" and accept the online revolution.

And now here we are, arguing for every little thing at every opportunity. Glad we have our 2yr old daughter or else I don't know were we'd be.

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You can absolutely "fall in love" with a person over the phone/internet. The question is will that love survive once you actually meet the person. The problem is that your mind is going to fill in the gaps and you might be headed for a serious let down. The question I'd have is what is your level of interaction? Do you talk to the person when they are happy or do you talk to them all the time - happy and not so happy? How deep is you conversation? etc etc etc.

It's easy to create an image based of limited information. The problem is you are going to complete it based on what you'd want that person to be like. Thus when you meet them they will likely not be exactly what you expected.

There is always the risk that they are ugly as hell too. Sexy phone voice won't make up for a double chin with hair on it.

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of course you can. and for some of the posters in the thread, the history of literature and life is full of true stories of some of the greatest and most passionate romances begun and conducted through the age-old correspondence of letters.

I note that when people usually discuss this topic, they ignore that long-established piece of reality. phone, video, and internet can, of course, actually increase the level of connection possible compared to mailed correspondence. this being such a broad topic with many attached sub-topics, much else can be said about the matter, as already has been.

but the basic question really shouldn't need to be asked, nor the obvious affirmative answer be automatically associated with some dysfunctional or emotionally inept state of mind on the part of those who have experienced it.

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Not embarrassed to admit it, the thing is that things have not gone well for quite a while now, and before we got married we had a lot of people against us saying that it wouldn't work out, that we were too young and that we were going too fast (we only "dated" 9 months before getting married). We never listened, we kept saying that people needed to "update" and accept the online revolution.

And now here we are, arguing for every little thing at every opportunity. Glad we have our 2yr old daughter or else I don't know were we'd be.

To be honest, I don't feel that has anything to do with having met the person on the internet. I think that has more to do with being stupid and rushing into a situation...no offense.

I rushed into a situation once, and some people told me the same thing, and I didn't listen. I should have stepped back and gotten myself in the right state of mind before I did it. I eventually ended up having the hurt the person I really loved because I realized if I didn't do it then, we'd be married and hating each other because we realized we hadn't grown fully as individuals before we committed to share our lives together.

It ended up being the best things for us because after taking the time away from each other for the past couple of years, and growing independently, we just got back together are much happier than we were when we were engaged.

Anyway, I think it is possible to feel love for someone based on their personality merely via the internet. But to fall in-love I think you have to be with the person and know what the personal interaction, chemistry and attraction is like. With webcams and all that, its easy to get an idea for someone, if both parties are honest with each other. However, you wont know for sure that what you feel is true until you get to be with the person and get a feel for them in person. I've got a couple of friends who have met people off of the internet, 1 is happily married with a kid. The other we think is getting duped by this chick who we doubt he's ever met and no one in his family even believes is real.

So it's a double edged sword ... but is love always like that?

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Of course it can happen. Just look at Candace and BigMike. HH is going to be the best man. Hunny is the bridesmaid. Reic is hoping to catch the garter. IONTOP hopes to catch the bouquet. Pez and Huly will be in charge of the food and cake. Jumbo is going to officiate. TK is in charge of security. Zoony has made the honeymoon travel arrangements (it's nice in Frogjump, TN at this time of the year). Rumor has it that Iheartskins and Art may show up. I'm the photographer - I'll be sure to take pics of the good stuff and post them in the tailgate.

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Yeah - you have to be worried about getting duped. Anybody see that thing on Forensic Files - this guy fell in love with this girl who was married, but she pretended to be an abused spouse, sending pics of fake bruises and black eyes and stuff. So they hatched a plan to murder the husband. Which the guy did. He shot him dead.

Shazaam, she cut off communication with the guy. Turns out she wanted her husband dead for the insurance money.

So the guy ends up commiting suicide because he realized she duped him and he was so heartbroken.

Meanwhile, the police grab her computer and eventually found the IMs in the AOL mainframe computer. Haha.

She ended up convicted and in prison.

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My brother did. Met a girl on the internet and is married and happily married to this very day. I can't get over it. Good for them.

I met my wife on the internet. Have been happily married for 7 years(in March). After meeting we actually dated for a year then decided we were meant for each other. The only thing is that she is a Dallas fan, I guess its good I didn't run when she first told me.:) I couldn't see my life anyother way at this point, and me being happy about it. So I guess it really depends on the person.:2cents:

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Of course it can happen. Just look at Candace and BigMike. HH is going to be the best man. Hunny is the bridesmaid. Reic is hoping to catch the garter. IONTOP hopes to catch the bouquet. Pez and Huly will be in charge of the food and cake. Jumbo is going to officiate. TK is in charge of security. Zoony has made the honeymoon travel arrangements (it's nice in Frogjump, TN at this time of the year). Rumor has it that Iheartskins and Art may show up. I'm the photographer - I'll be sure to take pics of the good stuff and post them in the tailgate.

:D:laugh:

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