CallMeGreen Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 I might tell Mr. Snyder a few things I've been thinking about lately. 1. Discretely back up against the "Stop" button, to gain a little more time. 2. I'd thank him for trying so hard to make the Redskins good again. I'd remind him to think with his head and his heart before his wallet. I'd offer my services to him as a front office fan liasion for one-year, money back guaranteed if not satisfied with my results. 3. Hand him my resume and begin the sales pitch for my new job as SVV (Senior Vice Vinny). 4. If I had no resume copies with me, I'd write the most important things from my resume onto his forehead with a Sharpie marker -- backwards so he could read it later. To be fair, I'd let him sign my forehead too. 5. I'll tell him my top coaching choices: -1a-Belicheck (not attainable, but dream big) -1b-GW -2-Ron Rivera -3-Steve Marriucci 6. I'd tell him to hire George Michael as his new short term play-by-play radio voice (3-5 years). After that, new booth personalities consisting of potentially Mark May, Joey T., Monte Coleman or Fred Smoot (if he's done playing by then). Love Sonny and Sam, but their time is coming to a close. And frankly, Larry never quite fit in. 7. I'd sketch out a rough drawing of a new 80,000 seat stadium on one of the floor tiles of the elevator, then tell him it needs to be within walking distance of a Metro stop. It also needs to have a sizeable family section, where NO ALCOHOL is served and hooliganism is not tolerated. Remind him his next generation of paying Redskins fans are still kids and would like to be able to attend a game without having beer poured on them or having their parents hands covering their ears (****ing profanity filter) the entire game. 8. I'd tell him about 10 things he needs to fix with his Six Flags parks before they open in the Spring. 9. I'd say to him "Never let yourself be caught unprepared like this again", as a reminder that even if your HOF head coach resigns unexpectedly, he must always have a contigency plan. 10. Remind him how much the fans love this team. Also tell him Scientology isn't all it's cracked up to be and that Coach Joe's Man upstairs has been doing His thing a lot longer than LRon Hubbard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wpns3/5 Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Ask him why a kid who grew up watching the skins play and dreamed of owning the team someday did not plan ahead on how to run it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RedDevil Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Please sell this team because you obviously dont know what you are doing... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chanhillbilly Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Rochambeau him then rummage through his pockets for loose millions.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Reaganaut Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 You will be a human toilet for the next 30 minutes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
'SKINSRICH Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 I'd ask him "How tall are you?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
herb mul-key Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 be like this man http://www.washingtonpost.com/wpsrv/sports/redskins/longterm/cooke/gallery/gallery.htm Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
argentina_redskins Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 I would probably try to beat him up (he'd prob be surrounded by 5 bodyguards). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sideshow24 Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Here is exactly what I'd do: :psyche: . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Russell Shotgun Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Ask him why a kid who grew up watching the skins play and dreamed of owning the team someday did not plan ahead on how to run it. Seroiusly?? What kid dreams of OWNING a team? When I was a kid, I dreamed of PLAYING for the Redskins. Now that I'm an adult, I still dream of playing for the Redskins. What a joke. Tells a lot about his personality. If I were riding in that elevator, I'd tell him he's going to need to call his dentist when it stops... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bruiserk Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 First I'd grab his keys, and hold them over his head, laughing as he jumps up to try and grab him. After I had a good laugh over that I'd beat him into a vegetable, with the hope that whoever has to take over for him hires a GM to run the team. Now, in reality I'd probably only say "Hi, how's it going", and continue on to my floor. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ruggala Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 What advice would you give him? Dan don't listen to all these idiots talking trash about you. Your taking your time to find the best head coach possible. If people think you should rush your decision they obviously don't know much about football. Keep doing what your doing and I'm sure we are gonna have a great coach for next season By the way can I borrow some money? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 9. I'd say to him "Never let yourself be caught unprepared like this again", as a reminder that even if your HOF head coach resigns unexpectedly, he must always have a contigency plan. I thought you mean never let yourself be caught alone in an elevator with a deranged fan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
laythalumber2130 Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 i would tell him how to tie a noose Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Griff Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 I would probably try to beat him up (he'd prob be surrounded by 5 bodyguards). Usually it's six and most of them are armed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ECU-ALUM Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Tell him, "If there is an ounce of mercy in you soul....sell the team." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joncevensen Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 I would tell him to go to Gregg Williams house and get on his knees and beg for GW to take the head coaching job - even let him pick a FO executive to split duties with Vinny Cerrato. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MoeRedskins Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 What floor will you be going to, sir? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
21 always Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 I would not say anything, because I would be too busy kicking him in the teeth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
W1N_SKINS Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 i would slap some sense into him Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
suze109 Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Are you kidding? I would be too terrified to even get on an elevator with him! I'd be too afraid he would do something stupid to it and completely break the damn thing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greenmile Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Will you ever stop price gouging? Will you ever have ketchup in the ketchup receptacles in the stadium? Why would you call Gibbs telling him to not run the ball on 3rd down against the Vikings? Why do you invite Tom Cruise to our games so that we look like a laughing stock, mentally-ill franchise? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Destino Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 Simple "Hi Dan, you suck as an owner and every year more and more people hate you. Do the right thing and sell the team. Have a great day." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lombardi's_kid_brother Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 I would make gentle love to him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SittingBull Posted January 25, 2008 Share Posted January 25, 2008 I'd press the emergency stop button and pull a Najeh Davenport on him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.