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The Miscellaneous Humor Thread---vids/gifs/pics/jokes---no articles, no "owned" stuff

Jumbo

By Jumbo
in The Tailgate

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Koolblue13

Koolblue13

Posted
Posted

https://www.newyorker.com/culture/annals-of-gastronomy/how-carob-traumatized-a-generation?mbid=social_facebook&utm_medium=social&utm_brand=tny&utm_social-type=owned&utm_source=facebook&fbclid=IwAR1IUbQ2-1S2YPcj9pD5uqV5BBaX4JKeItc12j5gl3L-eId2QW7hIc-4YD4

 

wry disgruntlement will forever unite those of us who were children during the height of the nineteen-seventies natural-foods movement. It was a time that we recall not for its principles—yes to organics, no to preservatives—but for its endless assaults on our tender young palates. There was brown rice that scoured our molars as we chewed, shedding gritty flecks of bran. There was watery homemade yogurt that resisted all attempts to mitigate its tartness. And, at the pinnacle of our dietary suffering, worse even than sprout sandwiches or fruit leather or whole-wheat scones, there was carob, the chocolate substitute that never could.

 

As adults, we make hundreds of carob-like dietary substitutions in the name of good health. We shave summer squash into long spirals and deceive ourselves that it’s anything like pasta. We tip coconut creamer into our coffee, ignoring the way it threatens to curdle, and project onto it the memory of café au lait. Grownups have mastered this acquired taste for the ersatz, but children have no ability to strike the same bargain. They taste not the similarities between the foods they are eating and the foods they really want to eat, only the thwarted desire for what is forbidden. No matter how much time passes, those objects of childhood dread are difficult to see anew. Poor carob. I may never know how good you taste.

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Destino

Destino

Posted
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24 minutes ago, Koolblue13 said:

https://www.newyorker.com/culture/annals-of-gastronomy/how-carob-traumatized-a-generation?mbid=social_facebook&utm_medium=social&utm_brand=tny&utm_social-type=owned&utm_source=facebook&fbclid=IwAR1IUbQ2-1S2YPcj9pD5uqV5BBaX4JKeItc12j5gl3L-eId2QW7hIc-4YD4

 

wry disgruntlement will forever unite those of us who were children during the height of the nineteen-seventies natural-foods movement. It was a time that we recall not for its principles—yes to organics, no to preservatives—but for its endless assaults on our tender young palates. There was brown rice that scoured our molars as we chewed, shedding gritty flecks of bran. There was watery homemade yogurt that resisted all attempts to mitigate its tartness. And, at the pinnacle of our dietary suffering, worse even than sprout sandwiches or fruit leather or whole-wheat scones, there was carob, the chocolate substitute that never could.

 

As adults, we make hundreds of carob-like dietary substitutions in the name of good health. We shave summer squash into long spirals and deceive ourselves that it’s anything like pasta. We tip coconut creamer into our coffee, ignoring the way it threatens to curdle, and project onto it the memory of café au lait. Grownups have mastered this acquired taste for the ersatz, but children have no ability to strike the same bargain. They taste not the similarities between the foods they are eating and the foods they really want to eat, only the thwarted desire for what is forbidden. No matter how much time passes, those objects of childhood dread are difficult to see anew. Poor carob. I may never know how good you taste.


 

I had to google to see if this carob thing was real. I’ve never even heard of it.

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Koolblue13

Koolblue13

Posted
Posted
7 minutes ago, Destino said:


 

I had to google to see if this carob thing was real. I’ve never even heard of it.

My sister sent me that article. I actually like it and still use it in baking and stuff, but I'm not a huge chocolate fan. 

 

My Mom was a hippie. We had that all natural oil free PB when I was little and it would tear the middle of the god awful brown bread we bought and she made a huge batch of Jelly once. You had to slide it out of the jar like cranberry sauce and slice it for the PBJ. It was awful.

 

Then I'd go to my friends house and have wonder bread with skippy, jelly and freaking marshmallow fluff? Are you ****ing kidding me? I can put marshmallows on this sandwich now?

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