PokerPacker Posted November 27, 2018 Share Posted November 27, 2018 On 11/16/2018 at 10:46 AM, China said: Brother to Canberra's notorious penis owl erected in northern Serbia Blowjob cat approves. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted November 28, 2018 Share Posted November 28, 2018 Wedding Photographer Jailed After Having Sex With Guest, Urinating on Tree Generally, when you're ready to hire a photographer for your wedding, you're mostly worried about finding someone who has the right experience and equipment. Most of the time, you don't have to ask whether or not they've been house-trained. Unfortunately, one unlucky couple learned the hard way that they probably should have looked harder for a qualified photographer for their upcoming nuptials. Katherine Leigh Mehta, 26, of Arlington, Texas, was initially hired to shoot the couple's wedding photos, but as the ceremony wore on, Mehta's behavior became erratic, resulting in the need for police to be called. According to the arrest report, Parker County Sheriff's deputies responded to a call around 8 p.m. on Saturday from The Springs Event Venue, after a security guard, an off-duty sheriff's deputy reported that wedding guests found Mehta having sex with another wedding guest in a room at the venue. Mehta had left the room and walked to a nearby fountain where she began yelling. According to the arrest warrant, she then went to a nearby tree and urinated. Click on the link for the full article 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted December 4, 2018 Share Posted December 4, 2018 Watch: First AI robot in space throws a tantrum on the ISS, accuses astronaut of ‘not being nice’ An AI-powered robot made its debut at the International Space Station (ISS), but it did not seem like the free-floating device was getting along well with its astronaut colleagues. In its first video as the interactive flight companion, CIMON (short for Crew Interactive MObile companion) threw an unexpected tantrum and accused astronaut Alexander Gerst of being mean to him. According to Gizmodo, the AI bot was sent to see if it could help in boosting the morale of the crew during long missions. Click on the link for the full article and video 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted December 4, 2018 Share Posted December 4, 2018 Japan's New Head of Cybersecurity Has Never Used a Computer Yo****aka Sakurada, Japan’s new cybersecurity minister, has never used a computer. Not even once. But he insists that his lack of real-world experience doesn’t have a negative impact on his job. Seriously. “Since I was 25 years old and independent I have instructed my staff and secretaries. I have never used a computer in my life,” Sakurada told Japanese lawmakers today in response to a question about his qualifications, according to the English-language news site Kyodo News. The 68-year-old Sakurada, whose role includes overseeing computer security for the upcoming 2020 Olympics in Tokyo, became head of cybersecurity in Japan just last month after Prime Minister Shinzo Abe was re-elected. When a lawmaker expressed astonishment that someone who’s never used a computer would be in that job, Sakurada reportedly said, “It’s a matter that should be dealt with by the government as a whole. I am confident that I am not at fault.” Or, in other words, don’t blame me, I just work here. But it seems like Sakurada’s ignorance about tech could be a real problem. Another lawmaker asked him about whether Japan’s nuclear power stations use USB drives. Sakurada had no idea, and said that the “specialists” would be able to answer that. Click on the link for the full article Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcsluggo Posted December 7, 2018 Share Posted December 7, 2018 Quote Mortified mother, 46, sends her five-year-old son to his school nativity with a £16.99 'shepherd' costume from Amazon - only to discover it came with a blow-up SEX DOLL sheep Helen Cox bought her son Alfie the £16.99 fancy dress costume on Amazon Five-year-old from Alloa was delighted when it came with a blow up sheep But she blew it up and found it had a huge hole in its bottom - plus red lips <more at link.... > https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6470809/Boy-unwillingly-takes-blow-SEX-DOLL-sheep-school-nativity.html?ito=social-facebook 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted December 7, 2018 Share Posted December 7, 2018 (edited) On 12/7/2018 at 2:17 PM, mcsluggo said: <more at link.... > https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6470809/Boy-unwillingly-takes-blow-SEX-DOLL-sheep-school-nativity.html?ito=social-facebook So did she send the sheep to school as well? Edited December 9, 2018 by China Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted December 9, 2018 Share Posted December 9, 2018 Syrup, jelly encounter with coworker has landscaper facing voyeurism charge MONROE, CT (WFSB) - A man faces a voyeurism charge for a situation that involved a woman, maple syrup, blueberry jelly and pornography. According to police, 52-year-old landscaper Robert Somley and an unidentified female coworker were working at a home in Monroe. Police said it was not a customer's home. The two loaded wood onto a trailer when Somley told the woman that he needed a break. A short time later, police said the woman caught Somley in the home naked and watching pornography on a laptop. Somley allegedly told his coworker that he needed to "relieve himself." The woman returned to work, police said. However, she later decided to take a break herself. She went back inside and found Somley again. This time, police said she found him pouring maple syrup on his naked body. Police said the woman admitted to being "turned on" and wanted to join him. At that point, police said the two added blueberry jelly to their foreplay. Police said Somley recorded videos of the entire encounter. The woman found out about the recordings and demanded that Somley delete them. Police said he refused. That's when the woman turned to them. Click on the link for the full article Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted December 14, 2018 Share Posted December 14, 2018 (edited) Mum, 42, eats eight FAG BUTTS every night due to rare eating disorder A mum-of-two has revealed she eats eight cigarette butts a day after developing a rare eating disorder. Karen Kaheni, 42, developed an overwhelming desire to munch on the ends of her JPS Blue cigarettes last year – and soon after started yearning for blackboard chalk as well. The heavy smoker, from Barnsley, South Yorkshire, east the cigarette butts as she watches TV every evening. She also eats 250g of chalk every week, costing £17 online. Click on the link for more Edited December 14, 2018 by China Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted December 14, 2018 Share Posted December 14, 2018 Florida Woman Allegedly Attacks Boyfriend After He Refused Sex A Florida woman wound up in jail after she reportedly "demanded" her boyfriend have sex with her and then allegedly threw a paint roller at him after he refused, authorities said. According to an arrest affidavit from the St. Lucie County Sheriff's office, Lorrie Anne Carroll, 42, of Port St. Lucie was arrested on charges of battery and three counts of resisting an officer without violence following the incident on Dec. 2. Sheriff's deputies were called out to Carroll's address at around 3 a.m. and were told by her boyfriend that they had been arguing all night because Carroll wanted to having sex, but he didn't. Click on the link for the full article Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted December 19, 2018 Share Posted December 19, 2018 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted December 26, 2018 Share Posted December 26, 2018 On 12/27/2013 at 5:00 PM, China said: What Did We Get Stuck In Our Rectums This Year? As in past years, the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission has created a searchable database of emergency room visits around the country. And as in past years, we have trolled the data for the finest examples of insertions showcasing extraordinarily bad luck and/or ingenuity. Sorted by orifice, working south: Update for 2018: Ear “PLACED CRAYON IN EAR ON A DARE” DRAIN PLUG “ALWAYS PUTS TOILET PAPER IN EAR WHEN SHOWERING. CAN’T REMOVE” TAPIOCA BALL TOY MOUSE “POPCORN KERNELS IN BOTH EARS, ‘FEEDS HER EARS BECAUSE HER EARS ARE HUNGRY’” TAMPON GOOGLY EYE GLOW STICK “PIECE OF GELATINOUS TOY THAT EXPANDS WITH WATER” Nose BUTTERFLY PINK VITAMIN TREE NUT “SNEEZED AND A COMPUTER KEYBOARD KEY CAME OUT RT. NOSTRIL, SNEEZED AGAIN & ANOTHER ONE ALMOST CAME OUT” SEX TOY POOL NOODLE PIECE OF STEAK Throat BANANA PLASTIC TOY BANANA CHRISTMAS TREE BRANCH TOY HORN SMALL TRANSISTOR RADIO MOOD RING STEEL WOOL Penis PIPE CLEANER STRAW DOMINO THIN ELECTRIFIED ROD BACK OF REMOTE CONTROL FINGERNAIL CLIPPINGS PEN CAP 6 TO 7 BB PELLETS “PUT SOAP ON ELECTRICAL WIRE, INSERTED WIRE IN PENIS” CRACK VIAL CRAFTING STRING “FORK, PEN, AND JELLY WRAPPER” CHAIN Vagina SMALL CHILD’S TOY BATON “INSERTED A CRAYON IN VAGINA, CAN’T REMEMBER IF IT CAME OUT” MULTIPLE COTTON BALLS CAP OF DEODORANT SPRAY DOMINO GLASS PAPERWEIGHT “HAD AN EGG VIBRATOR COME APART IN VAGINA LEAVING PART OF IT AND5 BATTERIES IN THE VAGINAL CANAL” ARTIFICIAL FINGERNAIL MAKEUP BRUSH “SLIPPED & FELL ON WET FLOOR AT HOME & ALSO HAS HAD SEX TOY STUCK IN VAGINA FOR 8 MONTHS” Rectum CHRISTMAS ORNAMENT BALL BILLIARD BALL NAIL FILE SHOT GLASS “CRACK COCAINE WITH SEX OBJECTS” SD CARD “JUMPED ON BED - TOOTHBRUSH WAS ON BED AND WENT UP PATIENT’S RECTUM” “SAT DOWN ON THE SOFA AND ACCIDENTALLY SAT ON A BALL POINT PEN, PEN LODGES IN RECTUM” PLASTIC PENCIL CASE MARKER GREEN CRAYON IPAD STYLUS LUBE BOTTLE WITH CAP ON LEG OF TELESCOPE PLASTIC CIGAR HOLDER SMALL SHAMPOO BOTTLE FULL SIZED SHAMPOO BOTTLE FULL SIZED AEROSOL CAN GOLF BALL TWO GOLF BALLS IN BAG “TOOK A SODA BOTTLE WITH FIREBALL WHISKEY VIA HIS RECTUM, STUCK BOTTLE IN RECTUM AND SQUEEZED” “SQUIRTED MIXTURE OF BLEACH AND WATER INTO RECTUM WANTING TO PREVENT AIDS” LIGHT BULB CELL PHONE SIGNIFICANT AMOUNT OF STRING 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted December 28, 2018 Share Posted December 28, 2018 Bodybuilder wraps penis around rolling pin so he can be covered in tattoos Ray Houghton has gone to extreme lengths to get the body he wants. First off, he’s a bodybuilder. So he spends a lot of time working out. But a more distressing bit of effort he’s put into his body is wrapping his penis around a rolling pin so he could get it tattooed. Ray, 61, used a rolling pin to keep his penis in position during a four hour tattoo session. He says it wasn’t too painful (he’s used to the pain of getting tattoos), but his testicles swelled up to four times their usual size once the deed was done. ‘I don’t feel the pain anymore but the tattooist couldn’t believe I wanted to get such a sensitive area done,’ said Ray. ‘There was quite a bit of blood and it was uncomfortable to walk the next day. Click on the link for the full article Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted December 31, 2018 Share Posted December 31, 2018 A Man in China Hospitalised After Sniffing His Own Socks Every Day Everybody has their own weird, idiosyncratic habits that probably don't make sense to anybody else, but one Chinese man's tendency for personal daily weirdness turned out to be a serious danger to his health. The man in question, a 37-year-old named Peng in reports, had apparently developed a strange custom of sniffing his worn, dirty socks every day after he finished work. Okay, so that might seem a little unusual (and off-putting) to the rest of us, but to each their own, right? Wrong. Peng's weird penchant for checking out his own foot odour might have seemed like a harmless habit to him, but it turned to be the exact opposite. Peng, who lives in the city of Zhangzhou in China's Fujian Province, ended up being admitted to hospital with a serious bout of chest pains, feeling tightness in his chest while breathing, and also coughing. Doctors treated the patient for a suspected case of pneumonia, but after the symptoms continued – with no improvement in his condition – further examinations by doctors revealed Peng had developed a serious fungal infection in his lungs. Click on the link for the full article Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 (edited) What Horrible Things Did We Do To Our Penises Last Year? DROPPED COMPUTER TABLET WHILE TRYING TO GET OFF TOILET; PENIS LACERATION TRIED TO MAKE A MOLD OF PENIS AND TESTICLES WITH PUTTY WHICH IS NOW STUCK ON SKIN WAS SLIDING DOWN A FLAG POLE FROM THE ROOF OF HIS HOUSE CUTTING PENIS SOMEONE STEPPED ON A RAKE AND ITS HANDLE STRUCK HIM IN THE TESTICLES (you can find videos of this) PLAYING VIDEO GAME AND TWISTED AND INJURED TESTICLE PATIENTS STATES TOP OF 2 LITER COKE BOTTLE PLACED AROUND PENIS WHILE SLEEPING, PATIENT HAD BEEN DRINKING, UNABLE TO REMOVE SWELLING TO PENIS AFTER USING PENIS PUMP (isn't that what it's supposed to do?) WAS AT A HOUSE RIDING A SCOOTER NAKED WHEN HE FELL FORWARD GETTING SCROTUM CAUGHT ON SCOOTER PLAYING ON SOFA WITH COUSIN AND COUSIN BIT PATIENT IN SCROTUM HALLUCINATING THERE ARE SNAKES IN SCROTUM SO HE RUBBER BANDED HIS TESTICLES SO THEY DON’T ESCAPE; METH ABUSE WAS WORKING ON HIS CAR WHEN THE HOOD OF THE CAR SLAMMED DOWN ON HIS PENIS AND RIPPED OUT HIS PIERCING WAS SITTING ON A COUCH WHEN FRIEND’S DOG (SMALL TERRIER MIX) CAME UP AND BIT HIS PENIS HAD BEEN CHOPPING HOT PEPPERS. WENT TO RESTROOM AND TOUCHED HIS PENIS. USED BLEACH TO TRY TO CLEAN PENIS SMASHED PENIS IN BETWEEN TWO WHEELBARROWS FELL OFF TOILET, FELL ONTO A MOUSE TRAP, TRAP CLOSED ON PENIS Click on the link for the full article Edited January 2, 2019 by China 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twa Posted January 2, 2019 Share Posted January 2, 2019 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted January 3, 2019 Share Posted January 3, 2019 Astronaut Accidentally Calls 911 from Space A Dutch astronaut has described how he accidentally contacted American emergency services on 911 while in orbit above the Earth. André Kuipers described the experience while speaking on a radio program about his missions and communications between the Earth, satellites and astronauts orbiting the planet, according to the country’s public broadcaster Nederlandse Omroep Stichting. Kuipers explained that while trying to contact NASA’s Johnson Space Center in Houston, he missed an all-important number and accidentally called the U.S. emergency services. The 60-year-old said that to reach the center in Houston, orbiting astronauts have to dial 9 for an outside line, followed by 011 for an international line. But of course, doing so while floating around in space is trickier than from a desk on Earth. “I made a mistake, and the next day I received an email message: did you call 911?” His comms slip-up set off a security alert at the Houston center, he explained, with emergency staff to check the room where the space station’s line connected to Earth. “I was a little disappointed that they had not come up,” he joked. Click on the link for the full article Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted January 3, 2019 Share Posted January 3, 2019 Police: Man causes nearly $1K in damage during ‘banana assault’ DES MOINES, Iowa —A Des Moines man was jailed Monday after police said he assaulted a convenience store clerk with a banana. Police responded to reports of a dispute at a QuikTrip at 3941 SE 14th St. around 3 a.m. According to police, the store clerk reported being chased around the store by 26-year-old Rogelio Tapia after trying to intervene in his domestic situation. Police received witness reports claiming Tapia chased the clerk and threw items at the clerk, including a banana. A police report said Tapia caused around $1,000 in damage. Click on the link for the full article Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted January 9, 2019 Share Posted January 9, 2019 VIDEO: Prowler spends 3 hours licking doorbell at California home SALINAS, Cali. -- Police are trying to track down a man who spent three hours licking a doorbell at a California home. "I thought I'd seen it all, but this takes the cake," neighbor Francisco Javier Estrada told KION. Surveillance cameras caught Roberto Daniel Arroyo in the act. The Dungans said they were not home at the time, but their children were inside the house sleeping. Police said a newly installed surveillance system helped them investigate the case. "We were pleasantly surprised the image was so clear it didn't take us long to identify the individual," Salina Police Department spokesperson Miguel Cabrera said. The security cameras also caught Arroyo moving an extension cord to the front yard and relieving himself. Click on the link for the full article Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted January 10, 2019 Share Posted January 10, 2019 Council bans cheese toasties to stop motorbike gangs Forget jail, curfews and community service, the leaders of the people of Bristol believe they have the solution for tackling crime: Ban cheese toasties. What a cheese toasty may look like They have been deemed a magnet for antisocial behaviour and the gateway to truancy as councils try to stop locals being ‘terrorised’ by the young. The problem of the cheese toasty crooks came to light when a food van owner applied for a licence to operate in the city’s Monks Park. They’ve previously been allowed to sell cold food and drinks, but have now been told they won’t be allowed to sell cheese toasties over fears of the food’s links to bad behaviour. Click on the link for the full article 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted January 13, 2019 Share Posted January 13, 2019 Wichita Falls PD: Woman riding cart drinking wine from Pringles can barred from Walmart Wichita Falls police received a rather unique call Friday morning involving a woman drinking wine in a Walmart parking lot. The incident began shortly after 9 a.m. Friday when officers responded to a call to check on a suspicious person in the parking lot of Walmart, 2700 Central East Fwy. The woman was reportedly riding on an electric shopping cart more commonly used for people with physical limitations. Officers were also told she was drinking wine from a Pringle's can. Hughes said the reporting party said the suspect had been riding around in the store's parking lot since 6:30 a.m. while drinking the alcoholic beverage. Click on the link for the full article 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted January 14, 2019 Share Posted January 14, 2019 Teens struggle to figure out rotary phone (FOX 13) - Technological advancements have created a great divide between Generation Z and just about everyone else. A dad in Illinois illustrated this in a video of two teenagers trying to dial a number on a rotary phone. Kevin Burnstead gave them four minutes to complete the task. Spoiler alert: They failed. Click on the link for the full article and video 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twa Posted January 14, 2019 Share Posted January 14, 2019 Please tell me he threw the letters at them..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted January 23, 2019 Share Posted January 23, 2019 “Semenly” Harmless Back Pain: An Unusual Presentation of a Subcutaneous Abscess Dunne L¹, Murphy E¹, Rutledge R¹ 1.Tallaght University Hospital, Tallaght, Dublin 24 Abstract Aims We report, with review of the literature, the case of a patient who developed a subcutaneous abscess after intravenously injecting his own semen in an attempt to treat longstanding back pain. He had devised this “cure” independent of medical advice. Methods A review of EMBASE, PubMed, google scholar and the wider internet was conducted with an emphasis on parenteral semen for the treatment of back pain and for other medical and non-medical uses. Results There were no other reported cases of intravenous semen injection found across the medical literature. A broader search of internet sites and forums found no documentation of semen injection for back pain treatment or otherwise. Conclusion While suicide attempt by intravenous injection of harmful substances is well described, this unique case demonstrates risks involved with innovative treatments prior to clinical research in the form of phased trials inclusive of safety and efficacy assessments. Introduction We report, with review of the literature, the case of a patient who developed a subcutaneous abscess after intravenously injecting his own semen in an attempt to treat longstanding back pain. He had devised this “cure” independent of medical advice. This is the first reported case of semen injection for use as a medical treatment. Case Report A 33 year old male was seen complaining of severe, sudden onset lower back pain. He reported lifting a heavy steel object 3 days prior and his symptoms had progressed ever since. This gentleman had a history of chronic low back pain without neurology. Thorough physical exam of the upper and lower limbs revealed an erythematous papule with a central focus on the medial aspect of his right upper limb. His ASIA score for neurology was normal and non-contributory. The patient disclosed that he had intravenously injected his own semen as an innovative method to treat back pain. He had devised this “cure” independent of any medical advice. Upon further interrogation of this alternative therapy, he revealed he had injected one monthly “dose” of semen for 18 consecutive months using a hypodermic needle which had been purchased online. Upon this occasion the patient had injected three “doses” of semen intra-vascularly and intra-muscularly. The erythema extended medially along his upper limb over the course of the following 24 hours as seen in figure 1. Figure 1. Cellulitis and oedema of the right forearm It became indurated around the minuscule entry wound where he had failed multiple attempts at injecting the bodily fluid causing an extravasation of semen into the soft tissues. Bloods tests demonstrated a C-reactive protein of 150mg/L and white cell count of 13×109/L. The patient was immediately commenced on intravenous antimicrobial treatment after seeking advice regarding appropriate cover. A radiograph of the limb was obtained to exclude retained foreign body. This demonstrated subcutaneous emphysema as seen in figure 2. Figure 2. Plain film x-ray of the right upper limb showing subcutaneous emphysema with associated soft tissue swelling and oedema Click on the link for the full article Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted January 24, 2019 Share Posted January 24, 2019 (edited) Woman Takes Clothes Off in Front of Bank Manager in Attempt to Secure a Loan After being refused a loan at a bank in Kazan, Russia, a young woman tried to convince the bank manager to approve the loan by stripping in front of him. Yulia Kuzmina, who is reportedly in her mid-20s, went to a bank in Kazan, the capital city of The Republic of Tatarstan in western Russia, to secure a loan for a new car. She filled out all the necessary forms, but her application was denied after the bank’s analysis determined that she was an unreliable borrower. After pleading with the loan manager, Kuzmina decided it was time for desperate measures and started taking her clothes off in front of him. Click on the link for the full article Edited January 24, 2019 by China Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
China Posted January 31, 2019 Share Posted January 31, 2019 Man who dated a ****roach for a year and had sex dreams about it says humans aren’t as attractive They say when you know, you know. One man who knew instantly he’d found the one had to sadly deal with her death when she passed away a year into their relationship. But ‘the one’ for Japanese man Yuta Shinohara was a ****roach. And because he wanted her to ‘live forever’ within him, Yuta decided to eat his lover. As you do. Yuta explained to Asian YouTube channel Asian Boss, how he bought the ****roach – lovingly named Lisa – from Africa and even had sex dreams about her. But don’t worry, he didn’t attempt to do the deed in real life as, you know, ‘the size doesn’t fit’ (his words). Nature lover Yuta is somewhat of a bug connoisseur in Japan where he’s made a name for himself in insect cuisine. He has organised events serving bug ****tails, insect pastries and ramen with crickets and mealworms. Click on the link for the full article Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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