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So, My Dad just told me he is going to get Married

Koolblue13

By Koolblue13
in The Tailgate

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HailYeah

HailYeah

Posted
Posted
It's absolutely his choice to make, the choice of who he will fall in love with and if he accepts it and is happy.

What does he say about what?

My bad. It sounded like you were saying its his choice to make, as in, being gay. And you dont agree with it. And I wondered what he had to say about that.

Way too personal, nevermind. Carry on.

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Koolblue13

Koolblue13

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Sure it does.

But in time, it will make sense. It will become normal. And your dad's (husband?) will become just another part of your family.

This year, I was talking to my Dad about the gay pride parade and his church (which has really helped him become more comfortable with being gay) was marching in it, but he said he wasn't ready.

I told him to ride with me, because I was turning my truck into a float, for the bar work at. He cried. It was an awesome day and a big step for both of us.

I know it will become normal(ish) and I'm fine with him being gay, if that's what makes him happy. My choices don't always make him the most gleaming parent. :ols:

But this just brings it to the forefront and if I'm bluffing, because it's never been in my face, than I guess I'll find out and go from there.

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Koolblue13

Koolblue13

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My bad. It sounded like you were saying its his choice to make, as in, being gay. And you dont agree with it. And I wondered what he had to say about that.

Way too personal, nevermind. Carry on.

It's fine. I did start a public thread about it.

Personally, I don't understand being gay. I chalk that up to me being straight. The same way that I don't understand how Blacks feel, because I'm white. So, I just try and accept that it's not my plight and whatever makes him happy, is good for everybody. I have friends that only date fat chics, I love overly skinny girls. It is what it is.

My grandfather died very young, the week I was born. My grandmother would never have let the thought of dating someone else, enter her mind. Sometimes, I wonder if my Dad being gay is some kind of defense mechanism, to not be alone, but not cheat on my dead mom.

It's extremely rare that someone finds a partner at that age so you should really consider yourself and your dad very lucky :)

I do and like I said, I'm glad he won't be alone any more and that he can share his life with another soul. He still cries every holiday and anniversary, so my sister and I try not to leave him alone. I'd say 23 years of morning is enough.

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Teller

Teller

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This year, I was talking to my Dad about the gay pride parade and his church (which has really helped him become more comfortable with being gay) was marching in it, but he said he wasn't ready.

I told him to ride with me, because I was turning my truck into a float, for the bar work at. He cried. It was an awesome day and a big step for both of us.

That's beautiful, man. For real. Sometimes we forget how important our love and respect for our parents is to them. I'm sure he knows this isn't easy for you, so for you to go out of your way to show your respect for him -- all of him -- I'm sure meant a lot.

I know it will become normal(ish) and I'm fine with him being gay, if that's what makes him happy. My choices don't always make him the most gleaming parent. :ols:

Who are you talkin too??? Anytime my mom introduces me as "my son, Jason." I always feel like I should quickly add, "Yeah, I'm her son. But I'm not her fault." :ols:

But this just brings it to the forefront and if I'm bluffing, because it's never been in my face, than I guess I'll find out and go from there.

You're a good guy. I've known you long enough to make that statement without reservation. No matter what, you'll do the right thing. And you'll work through whatever you need to work through. (Not just in this case, but in any part of your life.)

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Koolblue13

Koolblue13

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That's beautiful, man. For real. Sometimes we forget how important our love and respect for our parents is to them. I'm sure he knows this isn't easy for you, so for you to go out of your way to show your respect for him -- all of him -- I'm sure meant a lot.

Oh it was. He cried like a baby the entire time. My sister and I made so much fun of him.:ols: He kept trying to hide in the cab of my pick up, so people wouldn't see him. I would honk and wave, it drove him nuts.

The town I live in, is more gay friendly than straight sometimes. Coming out here, is about as dangerous as being in a moon bounce, with a helmet on.:ols:

Who are you talkin too??? Anytime my mom introduces me as "my son, Jason." I always feel like I should quickly add, "Yeah, I'm her son. But I'm not her fault." :ols:

I can't believe the things he has had to do, to let me know he was still by my side. Getting kicked out of schools, jail, tattooes on my hands and neck, debt. He is always there for me and I have never taken him for granted.

You're a good guy. I've known you long enough to make that statement without reservation. No matter what, you'll do the right thing. And you'll work through whatever you need to work through. (Not just in this case, but in any part of your life.)

Thanks man, that means a lot to me.:)

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Burgold

Burgold

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PA. I know the gay marriage isn't legally recognized by many states, but that doesn't make it real, in real life terms anyway.

His Rabbi is going to marry him at his church. :ols:

My families best friends growing up, the woman became a Rabbi. She also has tattooes.

So, a Tattooed Rabbi, is going to marry my Gay Father at his cult like Church.

Make sense?

Okay, this is a very weird story. I was told that as a Jew I was not allowed to deface my body with tattoos or I would not be allowed to be buried in a Jewish cemetery... so, a Rabbi with tattoos kind of blows my mind a little (and I've from others that this thing about tattoos is true in Judaism so I don't think it was my Mom trying to scare me out of getting one.)

On the big issue, if he has found love and someone to share his joys with who makes him happy than that is fantastic. The sex doesn't matter. If a religious person wants to recognize their bond and will do so formerly before God (aka marry them), then who am I as a secular Jew to second guess them. Rather, I would celebrate their good fortune in finding each other and that God graced them with love and joy.

In other words, Mazeltov. (I think I would be weirded out a little myself, but once past that I would try my hardest to be really happy for them)

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Springfield

Springfield

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First of all, congrats to your dad KB. It's great that he could find love after the loss of your mother. Best wishes to him.

Main point though... most people would view any new marriage as change from the norm. Change can be hard to accept, especially when it's a life change. Especially considering your father has changed sexual preferences. I think your reaction is normal. It takes time to get adjusted to such large changes. As long as you are truly happy for your dad, all will be well.

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Capt Rich Fla

Capt Rich Fla

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Well, you said he was 65. I guess I don't see anything wrong with it. He deserves some kind of companion to keep him company. We all do. I would set a few ground rules though. No kissing when we are at family functions and please don't ever let me hear bed springs.:D If those rules are adhered to, I guess it's OK.

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NavyDave

NavyDave

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I'm very proud of you Dave. :ols:

Don't worry before you know it, I'll get on your last nerve. :)

not trying to be controversial for the moment, but does the female Rabbi have err Big Tats that you can see from a distance or are they barely noticeable??

Back in the 80's I dated for a short while (3 days) a babe in Marseilles France of Jewish descent who was a punker with multicolored hair, piercings and a large Tat on her huge err chest.

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Koolblue13

Koolblue13

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Don't worry before you know it, I'll get on your last nerve. :)

not trying to be controversial for the moment, but does the female Rabbi have err Big Tats that you can see from a distance or are they barely noticeable??

Back in the 80's I dated for a short while (3 days) a babe in Marseilles France of Jewish descent who was a punker with multicolored hair, piercings and a large Tat on her huge err chest.

That town was great. I remember the guy who ran it had a huge Harley and they would clear the streets when he rode into the circle.

I got in so much trouble there. There was a great tattoo shop up on the hill.

Her Tattoos are small and you can't see them when she is dressed, unless she wants to show you. She took my Dad for his first.

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