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If the choice in '08 is between Rudy and Hillary...

ImmortalDragon

By ImmortalDragon
in The Tailgate

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ImmortalDragon

ImmortalDragon

Posted
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If the choice in '08 is between Rudy and Hillary, "values voters" must do the Christian thing and choose Hillary. Of course, I think all religion is nuts, but at least she practices it the way Jesus suggested: privately. Like a Dick Cheney energy meeting.

Plus, she's raised an admirable daughter, while Rudy's kids couldn't hate him more if they were New York City firefighters.

And let's not forget, Hillary didn't commit adultery. Her husband did. And afterwards, she did the Christian thing and forgave him. And then she had a GPS unit implanted in his penis. But the important thing is, she forgave him!

Now, I bring all this up because this weekend in Washington is the "Values Voters Convention." Three days of peace, love and hypocrisy. Where the Republican frontrunners will spend the week kissing the asses of 2,000 social conservatives who despise liberals, homosexuals, Muslims, Mexicans and Nobel Prize winners. And who believe the sound of a condom wrapper being opened makes angels die.

It's kind of like a "Star Trek" convention, only the virgins are angry--and they think outer space is just a theory. So, Ann Coulter, if you've got any more "******" jokes, this is the room for you.

But - but, here's something I learned while indulging one of my traditional values, reading. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, the states with the most conservative Christians have the highest rates of divorce, the highest teen pregnancy rates and the highest obesity levels. Yes, they're fat, knocked up and not talking to each other--but, at least they put homosexuality back where it belongs: in the airport men's room.

Now, I know what you "values voters" are saying right now: "Why would we listen to you, Bill Maher? You're a bachelor from heathen California. What do you know about family values?" Well, I know enough not to get married and live in Kansas.

And I know that if you can look at the war in Iraq, the melting environments and the descent of America into "idiocracy," and still think our biggest problems are boobies during the Super Bowl and the "war on Christmas," then you don't have values, you have issues.

If you had "values," you'd draw the line at torture. But a startling number of people who call themselves Christians don't. And I'm pretty sure if you asked, "What would Jesus veto," it wouldn't be health care for sick kids.

Why, it's almost like "values voters" don't really believe Jesus was right about anything. [in mock attack ad voice] "Jesus Christ: wrong on gays, wrong on taxes, wrong on torture, and wrong for America."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RAV-4z5x0NI

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chomerics

chomerics

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Classic Maher. he used to irritate the crap out of me, but I have come around and actually enjoy watching his show on HBO now. . .

The most classic one I can remember was with Charles Barkley and he was talking about being rich. I guess his mother or grandmother used to give him crap because he was not a democrat or something like that. . .well, supposedly, he has this conversation with his mother and she tells him "Charles, republicans are only for the rich" to which Barkley replied "But mom, I AM rich!". . . yea, it was funnier when I saw it too :doh:

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jbooma

jbooma

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Not a big fan of Hillary, at all, but if Rudy wins... Canada here I come.

sorry but no one in office is going to get me to move to canada :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

heck if jesse jackson was president i aint leaving :)

as of now I would vote Rudy but we have a long time and would love to see a reality show with Bill as the First Man :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

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mjah

mjah

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Maher gets onto some really hilarious rants, and manages to make excellent points along the way.

He may be four feet tall with a preposterously large head, but I think he's pretty entertaining anyway.

I disagree with his assertion that Hillary is faithful to Bill, though. From what I've heard, she lays more carpet than Empire Today.

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RDSKNfaithfull

RDSKNfaithfull

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Mahers show is pretty good occasionally...but it's hardly ever new or original...Bash Bush and evil Republicans as many times as possible and make fun of everyone who's not like him.

But he brings up really good points though, sometimes..great rant.

His show is good and he gives Deomocrats a good ribbing every week as well. He calls them "cats" at least 2 times every show.

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81artmonk

81artmonk

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The problem that I have with his arguement, is that like other Liberal wackos, he discounts the views of religious people as crazy and unimportant.

And I know that if you can look at the war in Iraq, the melting environments and the descent of America into "idiocracy," and still think our biggest problems are boobies during the Super Bowl and the "war on Christmas," then you don't have values, you have issues.

When in truth, they are views just like everyones elses. Maybe not yours, but are they any less important than others?? Of course, everyone thinks that their opinions are or should be priority, but that doesn't make one sides views any less valid than the others.

abortion I don't consider petty. The right for a child to live is kinda important. You can argue when does life begin, but the premise of thier fight is noble. "the war on christmas" as he calls it, is in their eyes an attack on their religion, you can argue that you don't believe in their God, but the premise of fighting for moral values and your(particular) religion a noble stand.

Personally I don't think those issues are petty. Sure the others are important, but so are those. I don't see why just becuase they are melded with religious issues they have to be downgraded and unimportant??

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ImmortalDragon

ImmortalDragon

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The problem that I have with his arguement, is that like other Liberal wackos, he discounts the views of religious people as crazy and unimportant.

When in truth, they are views just like everyones elses. Maybe not yours, but are they any less important than others?? Of course, everyone thinks that their opinions are or should be priority, but that doesn't make one sides views any less valid than the others.

abortion I don't consider petty. The right for a child to live is kinda important. You can argue when does life begin, but the premise of thier fight is noble. "the war on christmas" as he calls it, is in their eyes an attack on their religion, you can argue that you don't believe in their God, but the premise of fighting for moral values and your(particular) religion a noble stand.

Personally I don't think those issues are petty. Sure the others are important, but so are those. I don't see why just becuase they are melded with religious issues they have to be downgraded and unimportant??

He's basically saying the social conservatives have their priorities out of order.

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GibbsFactor

GibbsFactor

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The problem that I have with his arguement, is that like other Liberal wackos, he discounts the views of religious people as crazy and unimportant.

When in truth, they are views just like everyones elses. Maybe not yours, but are they any less important than others?? Of course, everyone thinks that their opinions are or should be priority, but that doesn't make one sides views any less valid than the others.

abortion I don't consider petty. The right for a child to live is kinda important. You can argue when does life begin, but the premise of thier fight is noble. "the war on christmas" as he calls it, is in their eyes an attack on their religion, you can argue that you don't believe in their God, but the premise of fighting for moral values and your(particular) religion a noble stand.

Personally I don't think those issues are petty. Sure the others are important, but so are those. I don't see why just becuase they are melded with religious issues they have to be downgraded and unimportant??

I honestly think we are all so afraid of facing our own issues that we make bigger deals of Paris, Janet's boobies and gays because they are much easier then the real tasks at hand. We've lived for 20 years without any "real" issues during the 80's and 90's and now that we have some serious tasks to deal with, we'd rather just watch OJ's trial.

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