Florida....? oh yeah, Florida.

[China]

Cops: Lewd Act Done Atop Dead Marsupial

 

In the long, storied history of American jurisprudence, these words have never previously appeared in a police report or court filing:

 

“The defendant was observed defecating on a deceased opossum with his pants lowered and his anal region exposed.”

 

 

Click on the link for the full story

[Larry]

When I see stories like this, my mind goes to that classic movie scene where the New Guy arrives in jail. The guard slams the door and walks off. And the inmate in the cell says .....

 

"So.  What are you in for?"

[Jabbyrwock]

9 minutes ago, Larry said:

When I see stories like this, my mind goes to that classic movie scene where the New Guy arrives in jail. The guard slams the door and walks off. And the inmate in the cell says .....

 

"So.  What are you in for?"

 

"Torpedoed some vermin"

 

Unless he was experiencing diarrhea, in which case he "liquidated" them.

[Larry]

Sounds so much better than "I dropped trou in public so I could take a dump on a dead possum."

[China]

‘This guy is a charlatan’: University of Florida turns against Joe Ladapo

 

Professors at the University of Florida had high hopes for Joseph Ladapo. But they quickly lost faith in him.

 

In 2021, the university was fast-tracking him into a tenured professorship as part of his appointment as Florida’s surgeon general. Ladapo, Gov. Ron DeSantis’ pick for the state’s top medical official, dazzled them with his Harvard degree and work as a research professor at New York University and UCLA.

 

Professors had anticipated Ladapo would bring at least $600,000 in grant funding to his new appointment from his previous job at UCLA. That didn’t happen. They expected he would conduct research on internal medicine, as directed by his job letter. Instead, he edited science research manuscripts, gave a guest lecture for grad students and wrote a memoir about his vaccine skepticism.

 

Ladapo’s work at UF has generally escaped scrutiny. Yet interviews with more than two dozen current and former faculty members, state lawmakers and former agency heads, as well as reviews of internal university emails and reports, show that staff was worried that Ladapo had bypassed a crucial review process when he was rushed into his coveted tenured position and, moreover, was unsuited for the position.

 

His dual role at UF shows how DeSantis and state Republicans have used the flagship public university to further their political goals, with uncertain benefits for students and other faculty. The university also hired as its new president former Nebraska GOP Sen. Ben Sasse, who joins several former Republican lawmakers in leadership roles in Florida higher education, including former state Sen. Ray Rodrigues, who is chancellor of the university system.

 

Ladapo has made headlines across the country for his contentious stances on Covid mandates and vaccines as surgeon general. He has bucked the medical establishment by claiming Pfizer-BioNTech and Moderna vaccines are dangerous for healthy young men and warned people under the age of 65 from getting the most recent Covid boosters. He was also criticized for supporting hydroxychloroquine, the anti-malaria drug heralded as a coronavirus treatment by former President Donald Trump. A study later found the drug didn’t prevent Covid-19.

While the state has provided other appointees with the same type of tenured position, Ladapo had warning signs from the start. It usually takes months to properly interview and analyze candidates for tenured professorships, but Ladapo’s application took less than three weeks.

 

“A lot of people thought he had been vetted by the College of Medicine like anyone who goes through the tenure process,” said one current UF professor who was not authorized to speak and was granted anonymity to freely discuss the matter. “That would have caught a lot of red flags.”

 

Click on the link for the full article

[Cooked Crack]

 

[Cooked Crack]

 

[Cooked Crack]

 

[China]

Alabama man ‘high on mushrooms’ arrested with parrot on shoulder after fighting with Florida deputies: WCSO

 

An Alabama man has more of a ‘Florida man’ story to tell after explaining to deputies he was high on mushrooms when they found him in a truck on a panhandle road with a parrot on his shoulder.

 

According to the Washington County Sheriff’s Office, on Friday, deputies received a call about a man pounding on the front door of a home and a vehicle sitting stationary nearby. 

Deputies say the homeowners asked the man to leave, but he would not comply. 

 

As WCSO deputies were headed to the scene, a car matching the description of the one reported was found in the area. 

 

Deputies say the driver, later identified as Timothy Brandon Bowers, 38, was sitting inside the vehicle with a blank look on his face and a parrot on his shoulder.

 

According to WCSO, as the deputy began speaking to Bowers, he saw several weapons near Bowers and asked him to exit the vehicle.

 

The deputy says Bowers was non-compliant and combative. 

 

Deputies say they deployed a department-issued taser and he was detained a short time afterward. 

 

Click on the link for the full article

[ixcuincle]

Florida is damn alright not sure why people are so alarmed 

 

I went down for 5 days and I didn't see any gators or Florida men, just a lot of waffle house 

[China]

59 minutes ago, ixcuincle said:

Florida is damn alright not sure why people are so alarmed 

 

I went down for 5 days and I didn't see any gators or Florida men, just a lot of waffle house 

 

Did you go in a Waffle House?  'Cause that's where a lot of Florida men hang out, especially late at night.

 

There are plenty of gators too.  But neither of those are the real problem with Florida.

[China]

Tampa man tries to enter MacDill AFB with AR-15, calls himself ‘Captain America’: DOJ

 

A Tampa man attempted to enter MacDill Air Force Base with an AR-15 rifle and over 100 rounds of ammunition last month, federal court documents state.

 

According to the criminal complaint filed in the U.S. District Court, Middle District of Florida, Baruche Roche II, 33, was stopped at the base’s Dale Mabry entrance gate on Nov. 3.

 

Roche refused to hand over his ID and instead verbally identified himself as “Captain America,” court documents state. He told security personnel he worked with the U.S. Special Operations Command (SOCOM) and had a meeting with a general “to provide top secret information.”

 

According to the complaint, Roche became argumentative and demanded to be let onto the base, or else he would “come back every day looking for the officers denying him entry.”

 

Roche made “several incoherent statements” and eventually gave security personnel an old military ID with his real name on it. He was detained due to his suspicious behavior and mental condition, court documents state.

 

Click on the link for the full article

[China]

Tarpon swiped from Fort Myers Bass Pro Shop pond. Police looking for man, woman and a video

 

Authorities are searching for answers after they say a man entered a local store with a fish net and removed a live tarpon from the store's indoor fish pond.

 

The Lee County Sheriff's Office said on Wednesday evening a man entered the Bass Pro Shops in Gulf Coast Town Center, 10040 Gulf Center Drive, with a fish net in hand, and removed a live tarpon from the store's indoor fish pond.

 

The sheriff's office said a woman and another man, who filmed the incident with a GoPro, accompanied the male suspect.

 

The individuals then fled the store with the tarpon, authorities said.

 

 

Click on the link for more

 

 

[stoshuaj]

Headline is just a tad misleading (shocker, I know) 

 

Deputies Knock Down Balcony to Get Robbery Suspect

 

Florida’s Volusia County Sheriff’s Department says authorities were called when a man allegedly stole from a Wawa convenience store. This resulted in a low-speed chase back to the suspect’s home. Once there, he barricaded himself inside his truck. Police said the suspect set both the truck and the house on fire. SWAT team members used heavy machinery to knock down the studs that held the balcony, causing it to fall with the suspect.

 

https://www.yahoo.com/news/deputies-knock-down-balcony-robbery-163702088.html

[China]

Family sues retirement community after Florida woman was killed by gator while walking her dog

 

The family of an 85-year-old woman who was snatched and killed by a gator while walking her dog is now suing the retirement community she was living in, according to NBC affiliate WPTV.

 

On Feb. 20, Gloria Serge was taking her dog for a walk near the retention pond behind her home in the Spanish Lakes Fairways community when an alligator over 10 feet long grabbed her foot and dragged her into the water, where she drowned.

 

“In fact, the neighborhood named this particular alligator Henry, and they named it Henry because the alligator was seen so often on the shores of this retention pond,” an attorney representing the family said.

 

The law firm Lesser Lesser Landy & Smith PLLC filed the lawsuit Thursday morning on behalf of the family claiming the retirement community knew of the alligators and failed to call the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission to remove the gator and that they are to blame for her death.

 

“There were no signs posted around the lake warning residents of the presence of an alligator, and the property managers encouraged people to sit near the lake by placing a bench along the shoreline,” the firm’s Managing Partner said. “This flies in the face of common sense and warnings from wildlife experts.”

 

The attorney said residents and staff in the community regularly fed the gator, including “chicken and food from their lunch” and that there were no warning signs of alligators near the pond or in the weekly newsletters they send to residents.

 

The attorney also claimed that Serge was “forced” to walk her dog near the pond after recovering a violation and eviction warning for breaking a rule the community has against walking pets in the streets.

 

Click on the link for the full article

[China]

On 7/16/2023 at 12:48 AM, China said:

Veterans quit DeSantis’ Florida State Guard over militialike training

 

When the first recruiting class of Gov. Ron DeSantis’ new Florida State Guard showed up for training last month, they had varied experiences and expectations.

 

Over 30 days in June, teenagers out of high school and retired military veterans came to Camp Blanding, the National Guard base near Jacksonville.

 

Many were told they would volunteer for a revived State Guard with a nonmilitary mission: help Floridians in times of need or disaster.

 

Instead, the state’s National Guard trained the volunteers for combat. Khakis and polos were replaced by camouflaged uniforms. Volunteers assured they could keep their facial hair were ordered to shave. And they were drilled on how to rappel with ropes, navigate through the woods and respond to incidents under military command.

 

When DeSantis announced in 2021 that he wanted to revive the long-dormant State Guard, he vowed it would help Floridians during emergencies. But in the year since its launch, key personnel and a defined mission remain elusive. The state is looking for the program’s third leader in eight months. According to records reviewed by the Times/Herald and interviews with program volunteers, a number of recruits quit after the first training class last month because they feared it was becoming too militaristic.

 

Weeks into that inaugural June training, one volunteer, a disabled retired Marine Corps captain, called the local sheriff’s office to report he was battered by Florida National Guard instructors when they forcibly shoved him into a van after he questioned the program and its leadership.

 

DeSantis’ office referred questions to Maj. Gen. John D. Haas, Florida’s adjutant general overseeing the Florida National Guard.

 

Click on the link for the full article

 

Revived by Gov. Ron DeSantis, Florida State Guard could get go-ahead outside state

 

The Florida State Guard, revived by Gov. Ron DeSantis, could operate outside Florida and be called into service anytime he "deemed necessary," under a bill approved Thursday by a House panel.

 

The House Local Administration, Federal Affairs & Special Districts Subcommittee voted 11-3 to support a proposal (HB 1551) that would remove part of a law that keeps the State Guard's activities only in the state.

 

Bill sponsor Mike Giallombardo, R-Cape Coral, described the bill's proposed changes, which also include lessening training requirements, as "technical."

 

The bill would clarify that the State Guard can be deployed to other states under an existing Emergency Management Assistance Compact, which lets states share resources during natural and man-made disasters.

 

The State Guard was initially set up during World War II to replace Florida National Guard members who were deployed abroad. It became inactive in 1947.

 

Click on the link for the full article

[Cooked Crack]

Quote

A Florida mom of three has been banned from dropping off and picking up her young from a Florida Christian school because she advertises her lucrative OnlyFans account on an oversize car decal.

Quote

Cline, who previously worked in assisted living facilities and as a beautician, first launched the explicit venture — which clears up to $20,000 a month — roughly three years ago. 

 

“It’s only me and my husband,” she said. “No one else is brought in, male or female. We always were into cameras in our bedroom, so we said, ‘Hey, let’s make some money off of this.'”

 

I'm good on paying to see this

[TheGreatBuzz]

1 hour ago, Cooked Crack said:

I'm good on paying to see this

 

You know there is plenty of free porn out there, right?

[Cooked Crack]

7 minutes ago, TheGreatBuzz said:

 

You know there is plenty of free porn out there, right?

I'm good in that I'm out on that. If I'm going to pay for porn the performers got to look not like that

[China]

Mystery noise annoys Tampa residents, researcher thinks he has answer

 

It’s a noise heard all over South Tampa: a faint, low-pitched sound that is more pronounced on some nights than others, and a sound that has proven difficult to track to its source.

 

Now, some people are trying to find out what’s causing the noise and where it’s coming from. Several thousand people are a part of a local group discussing the sound.

 

“When it’s active, everybody hears it,” said Sara Healy, a group administrator.

 

Healy has heard some pretty wild guesses about what’s causing it.

 

“Earlier in January, people were saying, ‘Oh, we saw a party barge and that’s what was causing this noise,” she said. “People have speculated secret operations at MacDill [Air Force Base]. Everything as crazy as aliens.”

 

Others believe the noise is being caused by fish.

 

Healy’s group has started a GoFundMe campaign to pay for a scientific study to find out if the noise is being caused by fish, specifically the Black Drum fish.

 

 

“Drums are known for the ability to produce sound. That’s why they’re named Drum,” said Dr. James Locascio, who did a graduate-level study of the Black Drum Fish and a similar noise event in Southwest Florida.

 

Click on the link for the full article

[China]

Florida lawmaker says bill to loosen rules on killing bears is aimed at ‘the ones that are on crack’

 

A Florida lawmaker seeking looser regulations on the killing of wildlife has claimed that black bears high on crack are breaking into people’s homes and “tearing them apart”.

 

The allegation from Republican state congressman Jason Shoaf, whose biography reveals a passion for hunting, is bizarre even by the already unorthodox standards of Florida, which in recent times has boasted cocaine sharks and marauding herpes-ridden monkeys.

 

“We’re talking about the ones that are on crack, and they break your door down, and they’re standing in your living room growling and tearing your house apart,” Shoaf told a meeting of the Florida legislature’s house infrastructure strategies committee discussing his House Bill 87, which would remove most penalties for killing bears without authorization.

 

“When you run into one of these crack bears, you should be able to shoot it, period. And you shouldn’t have to pause or be afraid you’re gonna get arrested or harassed or pay fines. That’s just crazy.”

 

The Guardian was unable to find a documented incident of any of Florida’s estimated population of 4,050 black bears having ingested crack, and Shoaf did not return a request for clarification.

 

Click on the link for the full article

[China]

Florida pickleball players snared in alleged scheme with sport ‘ambassador’ who owes millions

 

THE VILLAGES, Fla. (WFLA) — Rodney Grubbs has been a bit of a star in the fast-growing sport of pickleball, but now fellow players are taking him to a different court claiming he did not deliver on an investment promise.

 

Jennifer Butler, a retired airline pilot who lives in The Villages, said many investors considered Grubbs to be their friend.

 

“We trusted Rodney Grubbs 100 percent,” Butler said. “He was a very trusted friend.”

 

Grubbs, at one time dubbed “pickleball’s ultimate ambassador,” is accused of using that trust to convince investors to sink their money into his apparel and equipment company, Pickleball Rocks.

 

An Indiana Secretary of State cease and desist order alleges Grubbs and his company “committed securities fraud” by selling unregistered investment vehicles.

 

Butler said he told her there was “one more slot” available for an investor but according to Indiana investigators, there were many purported last slots.

 

“Grubbs has routinely told investors that Rocks has an ever-recurrent one last available slot to invest at $25,000,” the cease and desist document states.

 

UPDATE: On Wednesday, a federal judge in Indiana ordered Rodney Grubbs to liquidate his equipment and apparel company.

 

Click on the link for the full article

[China]

9-foot gator attacks man fishing in Florida pond

 

A 9-foot gator attacked a man who was fishing in a Florida pond over the weekend, according to the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission.

 

FWC officers were called to a pond near the Grand Vista Trail in Leesburg around 4:30 p.m. Sunday after a man suffered injuries to his hand and wrist from a gator attack.

 

“There’s a gator attacking a man in my backyard,” a person was heard saying during a 911 call. “Some people now have stopped in their golf cart.”

 

The man was airlifted to a trauma center in Orlando. His condition is not known.

 

Click on the link for the full article

[Larry]

When fishing, make sure you're not the bait. 

[China]

Florida Homeowners Are Trying to Offload Their Damaged Properties

 

Florida has more damaged properties up for sale than any other state in the country, according to data available on Zillow, revealing that homeowners in the Sunshine State are eager to unburden themselves from homes whose repairs could cost them greatly.

 

As of Thursday morning, there were a total of 202,545 properties listed on Zillow (including all types of properties from single-family and multi-family homes, to condos and lots of land) by agents in Florida. Of these, 963 were described as having some damage.

 

The number of damaged properties for sale was much higher than in states like California, New York and Texas. California had a total of 73,317 properties listed for sale on Zillow on Thursday morning, 38 of which were damaged. New York had 20 damaged properties up for sale for a total of 42,885, while Texas had 95 for a total of 176,756 properties for sale on Zillow.

 

While Florida has more properties for sale in general compared to other states like California and Texas, because of its great number of vacation homes on the market, the numbers of damaged properties for sale were still proportionately bigger than in the other two states.

 

This is due to a combination of two factors: the vulnerability of Florida to extreme weather events like hurricanes and flooding and the ongoing insurance crisis in the state, which has brought premiums in the state to be among the highest in the nation.

 

Click on the link for the full article