Spread the Word to End the Word (The "R-Word")

[Hubbs]

No. Because when you call somebody that, you are insinuating that there is something wrong with it, when in fact there is not. You are telling someone that they have messed up something so bad that you think they are lowered to your Uncle's level (as if he is beneath you).

But that's the whole point. There's something inherently bad about having a mental deficiency. Calling someone a "retard" isn't insulting their value as a human being, it's insulting their brainpower. Which is the definition of being retarded.

[Hubbs]

I don't agree. Intent is everything. If he means it as an insult, the implication to folks who really have the condition is negative and degrading.

Of course the condition is negative. Do you think a single person with a mental handicap would choose to keep it if we could offer to cure it with some sort of pill?

[Midnight Judges]

But that's the whole point. There's something inherently bad about having a mental deficiency.

I don't agree. It is what it is. That's what nature has given us.

Calling someone a "retard" isn't insulting their value as a human being, it's insulting their brainpower. Which is the definition of being retarded

That may be true, but you have nothing to gain by rubbing it in during an exchange where it is entirely irrelevant. You can just as easily call someone a dip****.

[Midnight Judges]

Of course the condition is negative. Do you think a single person with a mental handicap would choose to keep it if we could offer to cure it with some sort of pill?

I don't know, and neither do you. But the point is not whether or not it is factually accurate. The point is whether or not it is unnecessary and insulting to a third party. And it is.

[Hubbs]

I don't agree. It is what it is. That's what nature has given us.

You don't agree that a mental handicap is inherently bad? Now it just seems like you're grasping.

That may be true, but you have nothing to gain by rubbing it in during an exchange where it is entirely irrelevant. You can just as easily call someone a dip****.

Again, you're going to have to realize that the whole "rubbing it in" thing is what we're debating in the first place. If you're just gonna assume that it's true, you might as well not jump into the discussion, because it's entirely pointless for you.

I don't know, and neither do you. But the point is not whether or not it is factually accurate. The point is whether or not it is unnecessary and insulting to a third party. And it is.

Oh, I can say with a very high degree of confidence that no one with Down Syndrome would reject a cure for it. And you actually just highlighted the entire point of the discussion - some people believe that facts should, you know, matter. It sounds kind of reasonable. To allow anyone to make up reasons to be offended seems to be kind of, well... "mentally handicapped."

[LaxBuddy21]

No. Because when you call somebody that, you are insinuating that there is something wrong with it, when in fact there is not. You are telling someone that they have messed up something so bad that you think they are lowered to your Uncle's level (as if he is beneath you).

To call someone retarded means that their brain is functioning slower than that of a normal person. I define normal as being within 2 standard deviations of the mean IQ of human beings. It has nothing to do with my uncle whatsoever. I should be able to call a person slow, stupid, retarded or whatever if they say something that I feel falls into that category. As I stated before, I call myself those names when I feel I fall into that category so I don't see anything wrong with it.

This has absolutely nothing to do with your freedom of speech.

Your freedom of speech is with the law. According to the law, you are free to insult your Uncle as much as you want.

Denigrating your Uncle is a matter of choice. Someday I think you will make the right choice.

When someone arrests you or fines you for insulting your uncle, then it will be a matter of freedom. Until then, it's merely a matter of human decency.

I don't think it's cool to call someone a hick or a redneck, but your comparison is not analogous because being a farmer is a choice.

I will not get arrested or fined but if someone feels offended by it they definitely might sue and people pay that way all the time. And my comparison is analogous because I didnt choose to come from that background. My family made that choice and its where I come from. I have never been a farmer but because of my background and my accent, I get lumped into that category. Do you see me getting offended over it? No because its just a name. It is not taking food from my table, money from my pocket, a place for me to live or is it physically harming me in any way. Its ridiculous to get upset over it.

[Midnight Judges]

You don't agree that a mental handicap is inherently bad? Now it just seems like you're grasping.

Again, you're going to have to realize that the whole "rubbing it in" thing is what we're debating in the first place. If you're just gonna assume that it's true, you might as well not jump into the discussion, because it's entirely pointless for you.

Oh, I can say with a very high degree of confidence that no one with Down Syndrome would reject a cure for it. And you actually just highlighted the entire point of the discussion - some people believe that facts should, you know, matter. It sounds kind of reasonable. To allow anyone to make up reasons to be offended seems to be kind of, well... "mentally handicapped."

I'm not grasping at anything. That is how I see it.

Fair enough. I'll realize it right now through a perfectly sensable quote from DeanCollins:

I think "mentally challenged" is most commonly used these days. Thanks to the OP, my brother is MC and it's not nice to hear the R word being thrown around.

Now that I proven you are offending someone, I have realized my point.

Nobody is making up anything here. If you utilize a word as an insult, then you are in turn insulting the folks who it accurately reflects. Someday you a lax will realize it. If that day isn't today, so be it. I tried.

[Hubbs]

I'm not grasping at anything. That is how I see it.

Fair enough. I'll realize it right now through a perfectly sensable quote from DeanCollins:

Now that I proven you are offending someone, I have realized my point.

Nobody is making up anything here. If you utilize a word as an insult, then you are in turn insulting the folks who it accurately reflects. Someday you a lax will realize it. If that day isn't today, so be it. I tried.

Do you get that the whole discussion had gotten into whether "retard" should be insulting or not?

I'm fully aware that the word offends certain people. But I also believe that we should be able to discuss the reasoning behind that offense, and figure out whether or not it makes sense.

And I don't think you're completely thinking through what words mean, because the whole "insulting the folks who it accurately reflects" doesn't have anything to do with the word itself. If I call someone a "retard," that reflects upon the exact same group of people that I would be referencing if I called someone "dumb enough to be a candidate for Down Syndrome tests." It's the same thing. But we seem to have attached offense to one and not the other, which is a bit questionable.

[LaxBuddy21]

Now that I proven you are offending someone, I have realized my point.

Nobody is making up anything here. If you utilize a word as an insult, then you are in turn insulting the folks who it accurately reflects. Someday you a lax will realize it. If that day isn't today, so be it. I tried.

Ok I dont ever want to see you calling someone dumb or stupid. I dont want to ever see you call a girl a skank or slutty. I dont want to ever hear you call anyone a name ever because you are offending the people that it accurately reflects.

I will continue to call people whatever I feel like because I am calling them that because I think they accurately reflect what I am calling them. If I call you retarded its because I think your brain is operating at a lower than normal capacity. I think you accurately reflect that just as accurately as someone else might reflect that. Are mentally handicapped people less valuable people? No of course not but their brains function at a less than normal capacity and thats a fact whether you try to call it something else or not.

[LaxBuddy21]

As a matter of fact, when people have those mental handicaps, we understand why they do not comprehend certain things or why they act a certain way. It only becomes an insult when someone has the same issues with no explanation for it!

[Midnight Judges]

Ok I dont ever want to see you calling someone dumb or stupid. I dont want to ever see you call a girl a skank or slutty. I dont want to ever hear you call anyone a name ever because you are offending the people that it accurately reflects.

You need to work on your metaphor skills. Acting like a skank or a slut is a personal choice, not a condition. I listed several names that I think are just fine to call people. If you missed that, who knows what else you missed.

I hope the two of you return to this thread in 10 years.

[Midnight Judges]

Do you get that the whole discussion had gotten into whether "retard" should be insulting or not?

I'm fully aware that the word offends certain people. But I also believe that we should be able to discuss the reasoning behind that offense, and figure out whether or not it makes sense.

Even if it does make sense, it's extremely rude.

And I don't think you're completely thinking through what words mean, because the whole "insulting the folks who it accurately reflects" doesn't have anything to do with the word itself. If I call someone a "retard," that reflects upon the exact same group of people that I would be referencing if I called someone "dumb enough to be a candidate for Down Syndrome tests." It's the same thing. But we seem to have attached offense to one and not the other, which is a bit questionable

Both of those statements are quite offensive if you are saying them in an attempt to insult someone.

[PleaseBlitz]

Both of those statements are quite offensive if you are saying them in an attempt to insult someone.

When you insult someone, you are TRYING to offend them.

[Midnight Judges]

When you insult someone, you are TRYING to offend them.

talking about the third party here. My argument boils down to there being no point in insulting a third party when you can choose from a plethora of perfectly creative insults that leave disabled folks out of the crossfire.

[PleaseBlitz]

talking about the third party here. My argument boils down to there being no point in insulting a third party when you can choose from a plethora of perfectly creative insults that leave disabled folks out of the crossfire.

Some third parties find the F-word offensive too. People still use it. It gives your insult a little "umph." Same principle.

[Midnight Judges]

Some third parties find the F-word offensive too. People still use it. It gives your insult a little "umph." Same principle.

Not really the same. People can choose to be offended by the F-word.

[PleaseBlitz]

Not really the same. People can choose to be offended by the F-word.

And people can choose to be or to not be offended by the word "retard."

[Hubbs]

Not really the same. People can choose to be offended by the F-word.

*throws up hands*

It's like playing tennis against a brick wall.

[LaxBuddy21]

Not really the same. People can choose to be offended by the F-word.

See and this is why I dont understand why you dont get my point. People choose what offends them period. My point is everyone needs to stop getting offended so much. What is the point of being offended? Let everyone have their opinions and think what they want. As long as it doesnt take food, money, a roof over your head or it doesnt hurt someone physically then who cares?

[mbws]

I always find it strange and disturbing how often I hear kids and adults alike use the word "retard" (or tard, or some other variation) as an insult.

Particularly in this day and age, and in our society. We're constantly reminded to respect the cultural differences, sexual orientation, etc. of others. Yet it remains almost perfectly acceptable to call someone a "retard."

Imagine for a moment that you had a child who happened to be mentally challenged. Then imagine how hurtful it would be to hear a bunch of ignorant kids frivolously throwing around the word "retard" in conversation.

I'm not here to call anyone out. I'm sure I've used the word in the past myself, so I'm not here to criticize anyone. But I do want to put forth a challenge.

Here on Extremeskins, and in your own personal life...from here on, in a situation where you might ordinarily use that word, stop for a moment and try to think of another way to express yourself.

Of all the groups of people on the planet, who could be less deserving of having an insult directed at them?

I was glad to see that the Special Olympics has started a campaign to educate people about why it's not ok to use the word: www.r-word.org

You Shouldn't call a mentally retarded person a retard, but I think it's ok to call your not mentally retarded friend one.

[rincewind]

[Larry Brown #43]

You Shouldn't call a mentally retarded person a retard, but I think it's ok to call your not mentally retarded friend one.

I don't agree with this logic, for the same reason it's not ok to use the "N" word to describe a white person. You're still perpetuating the "N" word, even if you're using it on someone who's not black.

The bottom line for me is this. Using the word "retard", even against people who are of normal intelligence, perpetuates the use of a word that's hurtful to people who have mentally challenged people in their family. If you have a daughter or son who's mentally challenged, and you hear the word "retard" constantly used in common society, it's hurtful.

Why do we even need a slang term for mentally challenged people in our vocabulary? As stated by others, there are plenty of other ways to insult someone without perpetuating the use of this word. To me, if you have to rely on this word to insult someone, it says something about your own intelligence.

[skinfan133]

I've resigned myself to the fact that no matter what I say or how I say it, SOMEONE will be offended, so I say **** that, I'll just continue to say whatever comes to mind. If you're offended then get away from me and my speech. Its that simple.

[Special K]

LB, I think you brought up a good point with this thread and I absolutely agree.

I know I have been guilty in the past about using this term to describe other people or certain situations, but the last few years I've tried to make a concious effort not to use this word as an insult to anyone. I've now graduated to full-on cursing...

I'm not one who is a staunch proponent of political correctness, in fact, I abhore it in many ways. That being said, I do not support using slurs against a certain population of people who have no control over the way they were born, whether that be special needs, racial, etc.

[Titaw]

This subject is retarded. I could understand if someone is going all Healey and calling mentally incapable people retards, but if it is used to call a person that makes a stupid comment or action retarded it's fine.

I think it's retarded for people to be offended by things that are quite frankly retarded. If people were as passionate about REAL issues like exessive taxation, RETARDED bailouts, etc. this country would be a better place.

Yes I used the word retard or a variant of it six times and I did not call a single person a retard. I used it in the manner that I normally use the word.

What's next someone clamouring for the dismissal of the word "boy" from our vocabulary because they are offended because the man in question is over the age of 21 but they act like a child?

BTW, I do have mentally incapable friends and family.