Spread the Word to End the Word (The "R-Word")

[buenosdiaz]

yikes...

anyways...i have been guilty of using the term but as i have grown up use words like this less and less

and i agree that it should not be so commonly used given the origin of the term...

i dont condemn those that use it because growing up it wasn't a big deal...that doesnt mean it shouldnt have been...and as adults i dont see why making a conscious effort to tone it down would be wrong

again...i dont want a crusade against the word but having knowledge of how it is a negative term...well why not?

[Hubbs]

Very well put.

Yeah, mental handicaps are bad things, which people suffer from through no fault of their own. So to insult someone by hitting an innocent bystander in the process (as midnight judges eloquently put it above) is, to me, the hight of douchebaggery.

But wait... the whole point of the insult is to say that someone just did something so dumb that they might have a mental handicap. Isn't that the definition of a mental handicap?

I've never heard anyone suggest that it's a person's fault for being handicapped. But if the very definition is limited mental function, and the whole point of the insult is about limited mental function, then isn't that entirely different than insulting someone on the basis of race, which doesn't have any bearing on a person's abilities?

(And for the record, I'm not necessarily advocating the insult. I'm very much on the fence about it, because I can see what you're saying, but on the other hand, it seems to be an insult that's based more on biological fact than illogical bigotry.)

[Bubble Screen]

Dude. That's the VERB "to retard." That's a regular word. The noun "retard" is not even in the dictionary because it's a slang insult. Dumbass.

:laugh:

[Prosperity]

I agree, it's best not to use it as an insult. If not because of sensitivity issues, then at least because there are so many more colorful ways to call someone stupid.

[techboy]

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.

Never has a truism been less true.

I agree. People should not use the word "retard" as a slur. There are a multitude of perfectly acceptable ways to insult a person.

[Ax]

Never has a truism been less true.

Only if one allows it to be.

[Larry Brown #43]

But wait... the whole point of the insult is to say that someone just did something so dumb that they might have a mental handicap. Isn't that the definition of a mental handicap?

I've never heard anyone suggest that it's a person's fault for being handicapped. But if the very definition is limited mental function, and the whole point of the insult is about limited mental function, then isn't that entirely different than insulting someone on the basis of race, which doesn't have any bearing on a person's abilities?

But people aren't using the phrase "mental handicap." They're using the word "retard," which is an insulting word to describe mentally handicapped people.

Again, imagine you have a mentally handicapped child. Then you hear people using the jokingly using the "retard" amongst each other, and imagine how painful that would be. You'd probably want to beat the **** out of them.

[DeanCollins]

But people aren't using the phrase "mental handicap." They're using the word "retard," which is an insulting word to describe mentally handicapped people.

Again, imagine you have a mentally handicapped child. Then you hear people using the jokingly using the "retard" amongst each other, and imagine how painful that would be. You'd probably want to beat the **** out of them.

I think "mentally challenged" is most commonly used these days. Thanks to the OP, my brother is MC and it's not nice to hear the R word being thrown around.

[GoSkins561]

This is kind of my point...society constantly reminds us not to use words such as the "N" word (and rightly so). Yet it's perfectly ok to say "retard." Makes no sense to me.

Does the non profit group Association for Retarded Citizens offend you? It's kind of hard to ban the word when a non profit that represents retarded / challenged people uses it in their name.

[difleha]

It's because we don't have a mentally handicapped "Dr. King."

[techboy]

I think "mentally challenged" is most commonly used these days. Thanks to the OP, my brother is MC and it's not nice to hear the R word being thrown around.

Does the non profit group Association for Retarded Citizens offend you? It's kind of hard to ban the word when a non profit that represents retarded / challenged people uses it in their name.

This is part of the problem. The term "mentally retarded" is supposed to be a clinical term, and as someone who works in the field of learning problems, I'm getting really sick of having to shift terminology every five years (I think mentally challenged is actually a few shifts behind... now it's "person with"...) or so because people are too insensitive to stop using clinical terms as insults.

Just stop it. It's not that hard, and there are a lot of excellent insults that don't denigrate an entire class of people.

[Larry Brown #43]

I think "mentally challenged" is most commonly used these days. Thanks to the OP, my brother is MC and it's not nice to hear the R word being thrown around.

Thanks...I started this thread with people like you in mind. It's not just mentally challenged people who are hurt when the term "retard" is used. It's their family members too. You must be furious when you hear the word. That's your BROTHER. I was hoping someone like you would chime in to bolster the point.

[Larry Brown #43]

Does the non profit group Association for Retarded Citizens offend you? It's kind of hard to ban the word when a non profit that represents retarded / challenged people uses it in their name.

The word I was referring to in the original post is the noun "retard."

[Midnight Judges]

Does the non profit group Association for Retarded Citizens offend you?

Do they use it in a derogatory sense?

[difleha]

I had people called me deaf boy when I was in college and I was like, "Yeah, you got that correct!" Really, the point of insulting people because of their handicap is obviously meaningless if however, they only do that to improve their self-confidence or to distinguish themselves from the pack.

My brother is profoundly hard of hearing and I take pride that he is able to get into Harvard for next year. He works hard and is very intelligent; however, like me, I just don't have "it." At least, I get to talk about my brother as a source of inspiration to all handicapped people in the world.

Sure, this may be irrelevant to the thread but at least I told you the perspective of a "handicapped" person. Every person on Earth is really handicapped or delayed in some way and I don't think it is wise to call out a person "retard" because it might have a damaging effect on your personality.

[difleha]

Note that someone called me deaf and I said "You got that correct!" Haha.

[rincewind]

So than I guess this would considered highly offensive...

... though oddly appropriate.

[Hubbs]

But people aren't using the phrase "mental handicap." They're using the word "retard," which is an insulting word to describe mentally handicapped people.

Again, imagine you have a mentally handicapped child. Then you hear people using the jokingly using the "retard" amongst each other, and imagine how painful that would be. You'd probably want to beat the **** out of them.

But that has everything to do with the meanings we give a word, rather than the word itself. In most cases, rare conditions aside, most people mean "retard" and "mentally handicapped" to mean the same sort of tragic developmental state, yes? If they mean the same thing, but one is un-PC but the other isn't nearly as offensive, then doesn't that point to the demonization of a certain word, rather than the factual evidence of what the word actually means?

[GoSkins561]

Do they use it in a derogatory sense?

Actually no, I try not to call people names.

[Hubbs]

The word I was referring to in the original post is the noun "retard."

So as long as I use it in adjective form - calling someone "retarded," rather than "a retard" - it's fine by you?

[Larry Brown #43]

But that has everything to do with the meanings we give a word, rather than the word itself. In most cases, rare conditions aside, most people mean "retard" and "mentally handicapped" to mean the same sort of tragic developmental state, yes? If they mean the same thing, but one is un-PC but the other isn't nearly as offensive, then doesn't that point to the demonization of a certain word, rather than the factual evidence of what the word actually means?

I understand what you're saying, but I still don't see how one could think using the word "retard" is ok. To my knowledge, the noun "retard" is not a word that was once a medical or academic term (like oriental) that later morphed into something offensive. It was born as an insult and remains an insult. And it's hurtful to people whose lives have been touched by mental handicap. To me, that's the end of the story.

[Larry Brown #43]

So as long as I use it in adjective form - calling someone "retarded," rather than "a retard" - it's fine by you?

No, if you're using that word to demean someone then it's not cool. Look, I can't tell you how to run your life. If it makes you feel better about yourself to call people retards, then I'm probably not going to change your mind. But I still stand by my belief that it's not cool. People who have someone in their family with this condition would probably agree with me.

[difleha]

No, if you're using that word to demean someone then it's not cool. Look, I can't tell you how to run your life. If it makes you feel better about yourself to call people retards, then I'm probably not going to change your mind. But I still stand by my belief that it's not cool. People who have someone in their family with this condition would probably agree with me.

After reading this thread, I'm going to have to agree with you, Larry. Calling out people by their handicaps, who are already suffering mentally and physically, even if they're not there, is not a laughing matter. Not to mention they also suffer social discrimination from their normal peers and have to drastically endure the separation from their families because of the incoming medical expenses that need to be paid every month. My hearing aids cost about 6,000 dollars and they need to be replaced every three years. Is there a law out there that can relieve my family from these? Not at all. Not even insurance. And it's all because I have 3,000 tiny little hairs that can barely sense the sound waves coming through my cochlea. And it's all because they don't have the one chromosome that you have.

You(I'm not calling you out Larry) don't know how much these people had to go through, and I repeat, you are ignorant of the daily actions of their lives. So I suggest that everyone who reads this thread needs to be aware of what they say or else, you could be the one who would have a disabled children or grandchildren. How would you feel if the one you "love" is disabled. Haunting histories of you joking about a mentally handicapped person would make your love towards your future disabled children or grandchildren restraining.

[LaxBuddy21]

I disagree. Every time we try to tell people not to use a word, you make the word stronger and more meaningful. I have a mentally handicapped uncle that I am very close with and would defend if anyone ever tried to insult him but I use the word retarded all the time. I do not use it to demean a mentally handicapped person. I use it to call my friends slow when they say something dumb. I am really tired of not being able to say things or do things because other people get offended. Guess what? Someone gets offended by everything. The more and more we cater to them, we take away freedom of speech from everyone else. People should be able to express themselves however they want.

The N word is another word I think its ridiculous we flip out so much about. Why can black people use it but as soon as someone else says it its racist and they should be strung up. Its just a word. Why are we not allowed to insult one another? If someone is being an a-hole, I should be able to call him an a-hole. Tell the people who keep getting offended over everything and want to turn it into a cause to suck it up and deal with it. We have become such a soft country. People need to toughen up and start dealing with life in general.

[difleha]

EDITED at 7:22 pm.