Skins24 Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=39114 TESTING THE FAITH New Bible translation promotes fornication Archbishop of Canterbury praises version for 'extraordinary power' -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Posted: June 24, 2004 1:00 a.m. Eastern © 2004 WorldNetDaily.com A brand-new translation of the Bible – praised by Britain's archbishop of Canterbury, that nation’s senior Christian voice – flatly contradicts traditional core Christian beliefs on sex and morality. Titled "Good as New," the new Bible is translated by former Baptist minister John Henson for the "One" organization, to produce what the group calls a "new, fresh and adventurous" translation of the Christian scriptures. The 104th archbishop of Canterbury, Dr. Rowan Williams – leader of the Church of England – describes it is a book of "extraordinary power," but admitted many would be startled by its content. "Instead of condemning fornicators, adulterers and 'abusers of themselves with mankind'," says Ruth Gledhill, the London Times religious affairs correspondent, "the new version of his first letter to Corinth has St. Paul advising Christians not to go without sex for too long in case they get 'frustrated.'" "The new version, which Dr. Williams says he hopes will spread 'in epidemic profusion through religious and irreligious alike', turns St. Paul's strictures against fornication on their head," adds the Times. The One organization that produced the new Bible translation is dedicated to "establish[ing] peace, justice, dignity and rights for all." It is also focused on "sustainable use of the earth's resources," challenging "oppression, injustice, exclusion and discrimination" as well as accepting "one another, valuing their diversity and experience." According to Ekklesia, a London-based "theological think tank" that supports the "One" translation: The translation is pioneering in its accessibility, and changes the original Greek and Hebrew nomenclature into modern nicknames. St. Peter becomes "Rocky," Mary Magdalene becomes "Maggie," Aaron becomes "Ron," Andronicus becomes "Andy" and Barabbas becomes "Barry." In keeping with the times, translator Henson deftly translates "demon possession" as "mental illness" and "Son of Man," the expression Jesus frequently used to describe himself, as "the Complete Person." In addition, parables are rendered as "riddles," baptize is to "dip" in water, salvation becomes "healing" or "completeness" and Heaven becomes "the world beyond time and space." Here's how Williams, the top Anglican archbishop, describes the new Bible: "Instead of being taken into a specialized religious frame of reference – as happens even with the most conscientious of formal modern translations – and being given a gospel addressed to specialized concerns … we have here a vehicle for thinking and worshipping that is fully earthed, recognizably about our humanity." In addition, notes Ekklesia, the archbishop praises Henson's translation for eliminating "the stale, the technical, the unconsciously exclusive words and policies" in other translations. Here, according to the London Times, are a few sample passages: Mark 1:4 Authorized version: "John did baptize in the wilderness, and preach the baptism of repentance for the remission of sins." New: "John, nicknamed 'The Dipper,' was 'The Voice.' He was in the desert, inviting people to be dipped, to show they were determined to change their ways and wanted to be forgiven." Mark 1:10-11 Authorized version: "And straightway coming up out of the water, he saw the heavens opened, and the Spirit like a dove descending upon him. And there came a voice from the heaven saying, Thou art my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased." New: "As he was climbing up the bank again, the sun shone through a gap in the clouds. At the same time a pigeon flew down and perched on him. Jesus took this as a sign that God's spirit was with him. A voice from overhead was heard saying, 'That's my boy! You're doing fine!'" Matthew 23:25 Authorized version: "Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites!" New version: "Take a running jump, Holy Joes, humbugs!" Matthew 26:69-70 Authorized version: "Now Peter sat without in the palace: and a damsel came unto him, saying, 'Thou also wast with Jesus of Galilee.' But he denied before them all, saying, I know not what thou sayest." New: "Meanwhile Rocky was still sitting in the courtyard. A woman came up to him and said: 'Haven't I seen you with Jesus, the hero from Galilee?" Rocky shook his head and said: 'I don't know what the hell you're talking about!'" 1 Corinthians 7:1-2 KJV: "Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: [it is] good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, [to avoid] fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband." New: "Some of you think the best way to cope with sex is for men and women to keep right away from each other. That is more likely to lead to sexual offences. My advice is for everyone to have a regular partner." 1 Corinthians 7:8-7 KJV: "I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I. But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn." New: "If you know you have strong needs, get yourself a partner. Better than being frustrated." *** Rocky shook his head and said: 'I don't know what the hell you're talking about!'" A voice from overhead was heard saying, 'That's my boy! You're doing fine!'" "John, nicknamed 'The Dipper,' It's sad they're messing up the Bible like that (even if you don't believe it, it's still great historic text they are turning into a joke) but that's just funny. :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
codeorama Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 I don't know if this is a joke but it was funny as hell... Rocky?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vegas-Born Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 If God didn't want us to have sex he wouldn't have made it so good... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SnyderShrugged Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 I may surprise you here, but I am a practicing Christian and am not offended at all by a "modernized translation" of the Bible at all. I try to be open minded and view the Bible as being a document that is specific to an era along with it being the "word" of God. Man has shown many instances where the "modern" interpretation of the times was put in print and it may or may not have been the true meaning of the "word". I recently was curious of how God really wished us to be in a sexual sense. This has come from discussions on the topis of "Divine Sexuality" amongst some of my friends and co-workers. We all agreed to read a rather controversial book called "Dinine Sex" (sorry, cant remember the author). It was very interesting and thought provoking to say the least. I havnt decided what my opinion of the validity of the authors views are yet, but I do see where Mankind may have conveniently interpreted portions of biblical teaching towards a religious hierarchy's individual goals. Sorry for the rambling, but very interesting post topic! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan T. Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 Andy, Ron, Rocky, Barry, Maggie, "the Dipper"? Talk about dipped. . . :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Destino Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 wow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan T. Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 And what would Rev. Killjoy have to say about this? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SnyderShrugged Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 I think that the names selected were on the silly side and probably were ment to be a biblical Benny Hill (it's from England after all. It's a shame really, I'd be very interested in a Bible that is translated into my brand of english. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SEF Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 I don't think they should of changed the names. I know not why they didest that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jpillian Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 One word: ludicrous :doh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chomerics Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 He left out this one. . . And as Peter was beneath in the palace, there cometh one of the maids of the high priest: And when she saw Peter warming himself, she looked upon him, and said, And thou also wast with Jesus of Nazareth. But he denied [the first denial], saying, I know not, neither understand I what thou sayest. And he went out into the porch; and the (ock crew. Mark(14:64-67) Peter was kicking it in the hood when this phat biatch wearing her fu(k me pumps caught him spanking it. She looked at him and said, "I know you, you used to hang with that Jesus dude" Peter replied "man, you'ze iz one crazy biatch, I don't know what the hell you'ze talkin 'bout" Peter then went out on the porch and the damn pit bull started barking at him. The New Testament according to Chomerics Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
codeorama Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 You Forgot... John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. Translated... "G" had mad respect for da hood that he dissed his girlfriend's shorty and who ever is represent'n "G" ain't gonna get capped but lay low for a long time... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chomerics Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 Jus' hang loose, blood. She gonna catch ya up on da' rebound on da' med side. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ax Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 Originally posted by codeorama You Forgot... John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. Translated... "G" had mad respect for da hood that he dissed his girlfriend's shorty and who ever is represent'n "G" ain't gonna get capped but lay low for a long time... er..um... Word?:confused: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WallyG3 Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 What it is, big mama? My mama di'nt raise no dummies. I dug her rap! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doggmatic Posted June 24, 2004 Share Posted June 24, 2004 Man, ya'll fools be kickin it some kinda crazy up in here, up in here. Awww. What do I know. My schizzle be on the fizzle, dizzle. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Nostril Posted June 25, 2004 Share Posted June 25, 2004 I think that this thing is almost definitely some sort of joke. I just don't have any idea what market would be interested in a bible where people talk in a soft beatnick sort of paraphrase except the comedy market. Maybe the author was intending to demonstrate the absurdity of certain modern translation of the bible, maybe he just thought it would be funny, or maybe the article is a fabrication the onion style. The point is someone is laughing. I'm a christian who has no problem with a modernized bible, but they should be brand new translations not paraphrases of the KJV(not the most perfect translation to begin with), which this obviously is. I also agree with the person who says that when reading the bible we need to be aware of the ancient cultural context. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Riggo-toni Posted June 25, 2004 Share Posted June 25, 2004 Originally posted by codeorama You Forgot... John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. Translated... "G" had mad respect for da hood that he dissed his girlfriend's shorty and who ever is represent'n "G" ain't gonna get capped but lay low for a long time... :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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