zoony Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 But my favorite is whenever someone starts to use the term "we". "What is this we you speak of, you have a mouse in your pocket?" "Do you have a turd in your pocket?" > mouse Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SKINS@THEGOALLINE Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 "Yep, I'm a drunk, but you're ugly, I wake up sober and you wake up ugly." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SkinsOrlando Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 "You're the reason abortions exist" good for many occasions Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cathartic-j Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 "You're the reason abortions exist"good for many occasions Like (shotgun) weddings? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Brave Little Toaster Oven Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 I actually used this at work onetime: The lady saw the price of shrimp and said "Well, now Ive seen everything" I replied: Have you seen a man eat his own head? Her: No? Me: Well, then you havent seen everything She had this weird look on her face as she realized what I said :laugh: When someone says something really retarded, I respond back in a way they cant understand and say "a sphincter says what?"....more times than not they say "what?" most of the time its because they dont know what a sphincter is :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SkinsOrlando Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 ^^^^ Waynes world beat you to it, before you were born. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bbruce0 Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 i always like "that's what she said." it's best when it's said after things that don't make sense as sexual innuendos Good Ol Michael Scott Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dictator Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 Homer: Ooh, "Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions"! I'm great at these. Ask me if something smells funny in here, Boy. Bart: Does something smell funny in here? Homer: I don't think so...stupid! [laughs to self] Marge: [walking in] Homey, you want pork chops? Homer: No, I want roast beef, you clod! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rumrunner6900 Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 Oh yeah....when someone does something stupid... "You suck at life." Simple but effective! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
outbaksean Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 "yo mamas a llama" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iheartskins Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 "Yep, I'm a drunk, but you're ugly, I wake up sober and you wake up ugly." That's a ****ization of a Winston Churchill quote. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Beer is Food Posted April 14, 2008 Share Posted April 14, 2008 When somone is telling a story or joke or whatever and they just drone on and on and considering I have no attention span- it happens alot.... What? If I give you a nickel, you'll show me your pickel... and then you call him a homo. And, I'm a fan of Caddy Shack's It looks good on you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellis Posted April 15, 2008 Share Posted April 15, 2008 My favorite one-liner... "I'd buy that for a dollar!!!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellis Posted April 15, 2008 Share Posted April 15, 2008 When somone is telling a story or joke or whatever and they just drone on and on and considering I have no attention span- it happens alot.... When this happens, say... "dude... you missed your exit." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pjfootballer Posted April 15, 2008 Share Posted April 15, 2008 When someone asks me to do something, I always respond with, "ah, let me think about it, no." With no hesitation between the "think about it" and the "no". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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