Blue states' letter to red states.

Shoot, I'll throw in Vegas and the Florida Keys if they promise. No link, sorry. From an email..........

Dear Red States...

We've decided we're leaving. We intend to form our own country, and

we're taking the other Blue States with us.

In case you aren't aware, that includes Hawaii, Oregon,Washington,

Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Illinois and all the Northeast. We

believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially

to the people of the new country of New California.

To sum up briefly: You get Texas, Oklahoma and all the slave states.

We get stem cell research and the best beaches. We get Elliot

Spitzer. You get Ken Lay.

We get the Statue of Liberty. You get Dollywood.

We get Intel and Microsoft. You get WorldCom.

We get Harvard. You get Ole' Miss.

We get 85 percent of America's venture capital and entrepreneurs. You

get Alabama.

We get two-thirds of the tax revenue, you get to make the red states

pay their fair share.

Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than the

Christian Coalition's, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a

bunch of single moms.

Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and

anti-war, and we're going to want all our citizens back from Iraq at

once. If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals. They have

kids they're apparently willing to send to their deaths for no

purpose, and they don't care if you don't show pictures of their

children's caskets coming home. We do wish you success in Iraq, and

hope that the WMDs turn up, but we're not willing to spend our

resources in Bush's Quagmire.

With the Blue States in hand, we will have firm control of 80 percent

of the country's fresh water, more than 90 percent of the pineapple

and lettuce, 92 percent of the nation's fresh fruit, 95 percent of

America's quality wines (you can serve French wines at state dinners)

90 percent of all cheese, 90 percent of the high tech industry, most

of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and

condors, all the Ivy and Seven Sister schools, plus Harvard, Yale,

Stanford, Cal Tech and MIT.

With the Red States, on the other hand, you will have to cope with 88

percent of all obese Americans (and their projected health care

costs), 92 percent of all U.S. mosquitoes, nearly 100 percent of the

tornadoes, 90 percent of the hurricanes, 99 percent of all Southern

Baptists, virtually 100 percent of all televangelists, Rush Limbaugh,

Bob Jones University, Clemson and the University of Georgia.

We get Hollywood and Yosemite, thank you.

Additionally, 38 percent of those in the Red states believe Jonah was

actually swallowed by a whale, 62 percent believe life is sacred

unless we're discussing the death penalty or gun laws, 44 percent say

that evolution is only a theory, 53 percent that Saddam was involved

in 9/11 and 61 percent of you crazy b*****ds believe you are people

with higher morals then we lefties.

By the way, we're taking the good pot, too. You can have that dirt

weed they grow in Mexico.

Peace out,

Blue States

Red states response-

Shut the door when you leave.

I think you guys are severly missing the point of this.

i'm pretty sure this has been posted before.....i know i read it a while back

I think you guys are severly missing the point of this.

if there is one, i missed it

Cool maybe we can get our version of the Confederate flag.

i'm pretty sure this has been posted before.....i know i read it a while back

More than once.

If we get the pot what do the blue states get? The yayo?

Wow, with all stuff and all those people, you STILL couldn't get George Bush out of the White House :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

Hard to diagree with most of that

It will be interesting to see how the next Presidential election plays out and what kind of candidates stand.

In Northern Virginia Bush beat Kerry comfortably, but Kaine beat Kilgore including in Loudoun and Prince William Counties.

Kerry was seen as too left of center while Kilgore was too far right.

if there is one, i missed it

The point is that contrary to what Red Staters think, Blue States are just as American as they are, being as that they are arguably more important to the Union than the Red States are. Red Staters always throw around statements like "if you don't like how we run this country, then leave" (evidenced by the above posts), but what they don't realize is how ****ed they'd be if the blue states did.

If we get the pot what do the blue states get? The yayo?

The blue states get the good pot. You guys are stuck with Mexican dirt brickweed.

Blue States sure are greedy. And bitter.

Blue States sure are greedy. And bitter.

Oppressed peoples tend to be that way.

Blue States sure are greedy. And bitter.

All those Red states on federal welfare who don't believe in an honest days work for an honest days pay, do make a man angry sometimes.

It appears that the blue states get every place that is fun to visit, but you are darn glad you don't live there.

Red states response-

Shut the door when you leave.

If only, I'd be through that door in a heartbeat

More than once.

Hmm, I couldn't find it at all.

This is a really easy pot to stir:

Who gets the Skins?

The are the Washington Redskins, so they should go with the blue states.

Their corporate offices and training facility is in Va, so the should go red.

The stadium in in Maryland.....blue.

They are owned by a billionaire.....red.

Their best players went to Miami, Miami, Miami, Auburn, Alabama, and Utah.......Red again.

They are the RED-skins......red is running away with it.

The point is that contrary to what Red Staters think, Blue States are just as American as they are, being as that they are arguably more important to the Union than the Red States are. Red Staters always throw around statements like "if you don't like how we run this country, then leave" (evidenced by the above posts), but what they don't realize is how ****ed they'd be if the blue states did.

not all red staters think like that, for one.

and for two, blue staters sometimes think they're more american.

i call it a push.

and you're not just leaving us w/ brickweed. we need to re-negotiate. can we extend the deadline to get a new deal?

Welcome to 2004!

This is a really easy pot to stir:

Who gets the Skins?

The are the Washington Redskins, so they should go with the blue states.

Their corporate offices and training facility is in Va, so the should go red.

The stadium in in Maryland.....blue.

They are owned by a billionaire.....red.

Their best players went to Miami, Miami, Miami, Auburn, Alabama, and Utah.......Red again.

They are the RED-skins......red is running away with it.

They're the team of the District of Columbia, so they go blue.

I really hate this blue state/red state crap. Why is it so difficult to simply be an American?

They're the team of the District of Columbia, so they go blue.

Chopper, you get either weed or the Skins.......which one do you pick?

I hate posts like this, from either side. It's just as moronic as the one somebody posted last week comparing the blizzard effect on northern states to Hurricane Katrina's effect on New Orleans.

nya nya nya finger in your eye nya nya nya