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Who would be the best write-in candidate for President? (Joke Thread)

Commander PK

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I'm voting for Mickey Mouse. I was in Disney World last week, and from all the French and Spanish speakers, as well as all the British accents I heard, I think he would be great at keeping up foreign relations. Clearly, Mickey has transcended borders to reach people all over the world. :D

Not so sure how he would do with the Economic Crisis though. :D

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Richie Rich -- he could fix the economy all by himself.

Jughead -- wait, nevermind. He had the last 8 years to try. :doh:

Mighty Mouse -- "Here he comes to save the daaaaay!!!!!"

Batman -- another rich guy (Bruce Wayne) and utility belts for all!

Captain Ahab -- the last president who went after whales that blow did OK with the economy. :silly:

Dale Earnhardt Jr. -- maybe we just picked the wrong guy with a famous daddy to run the country.

Jesus -- fed thousands with a couple of fish and loaves of bread. Imagine what HE could do with a $600 stimulus check.

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General Zod

Look at the way your society operates. I cannot possibly have dreamed up such a scheme as what you have brought upon yourselves: an endless cycle of lending and engineering of abstract markets that leaves the society destitute and broke. Now you have the banks themselves barren of money; this liquidity, as it were; and slowly we're seeing them fail at supporting small businesses; the backbone of the economy. That package of Lunchables you people eat: how will that get to your store when the truckers and the small freight companies can't operate anymore? How will those truckers and freight company people buy your mortgages and insurance if they're out of a job? And look at your government policies, funneling massive amounts of subsidies into things like corn production into fuel while Haiti starves and supermarket prices skyrocket. I have nothing but outrage that your leaders have squandered away your dignity and self-esteem, leaving me with a trashed bargain-basement nation in foreclosure. I appear before you tonight humiliated and angry. When you head to that voting booth in a couple of weeks, your agenda is clear. You shall hand me the Presidency. I shall promise amnesty for your deeds of having elected this vermin into office: the 110th Congress, the Bush administration, and whoever else is responsible. I guarantee you a fair system of corruption and unchecked power, and I offer transparency so that you will never be left misinformed about the injust and immoral policies of my administration. And to this end I shall impose an immediate economic solution. All personal debt and equity removed more than two degrees from any personal checking account shall be decreed part of the fantasy market; no different from Monopoly money. It will simply cease to exist. Your business tycoons, bankers, and derivatives brokers will be forced to return to the basics and build a stable foundation for long term riches. I shall impose forced labor for all in return for a fair salary and all of your worldly goods. And with that, you shall give me your eternal allegience.

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