Jump to content
Washington Football Team Logo

The absolut horror of my first Skins game. Was it a dream? I wish.


Recommended Posts

I woke up to a warm April sunrise, nearly a year ago today. I sat down to read the newspaper and have a cup of coffee, when I saw the newly released schedule for the 2005-2006 season. I was overjoyed to see my beloved Skins would be hosting Dallas on December 18th, just 2 days shy of my birthday.

My first thought came to be that it would be an amazing gift to hint around for my wife to get me tickets to finally see a game live, especially since I was sure they'd be fighting for a playoff spot. I quickly did all the typically obvious hinting. I left the schedule wide open on the table for her to see, even circling the date. I talked all day about what a great present this would be, but knew it would be a difficult task to convince her, since at the time she did nothing but jokingly poke fun at my obsession with this wonderful franchise. A franchise who hadn't shown many signs of life in over a decade.

My goal was to convince her that this just might be the year that things finally get back on track, so i proceeded to pamper her, knowing this would be the only way to persuade her into putting that much of our money into a trip to see a game for a team that had struggled for so long. Great idea in my eyes, waste of hard earned money in hers, but i knew what my final goal was, and I was gonna get there - at all cost.

We didn't live too far from D.C. - Virginia Beach to be exact, so this was a good way to start the begging, by letting her know how much we would save on travel. She told me travel was never an issue, because if I was to see my game, it would be a solo mission (she hates football) and so the only cost would be for me, so I thought it would simplify my task greatly.

In early August, I traded in my clunker (1963 Plymouth Duster) and got a Mercury Sable. I was going to need a reliable car if I was to make the 5 hour trip and back safely. Since the season was about to start, and she had yet to make a move, I knew I had to kick it in high gear if I was gonna make it to D.C. for the game.

After a 3-0 start to the season, and bragging to everyone who would listen that this indeed would be the year, my wife finally gave in, and handed me the prize. One ticket, section 201, to a game I would be eagerly anticipating for the next 3 months.

December 17th, the night before the game. I drove for over an hour, smiling the entire way, to visit a friend in Franklin, VA, because he too being a huge fan and never having been to a game, wanted me to bring his camera, and take plenty of pics at the game. It was a long, fun night, but the celebrating was short lived.

That night, we had drank enough beer watching old Skins tapes, to put a horse in a coma. Last thing I remember, I was smiling while watching Brian Mitchell burn the Eagles on a punt return in the closing minutes to pull out the win. I was excited with anticipation that I was now just 12 hours away from seeing my first live game. That was 4am, early on December 18th.

I woke up to loud screams echoing in my head, screams of pure horror. All I could feel was an intense heat that felt like my skin would melt off my body at any second. The house was on fire, and I was inside, drunk as a skunk. When you're minutes from death, it's amazing just how quickly you can lose a buzz. I wrapped a sheet around my fist, and punched out the window to get out. I fell nearly 15 feet to the ground, right into the frozen ground.

I sat up, amazed that I was in very little pain, and that i could actually move. Then something amzingly frightening occured to me. The friend I had been visiting, only lived in a 1 story house. That's when I said Toto, we aren't in Kansas anymore.

Nobody had seen me fall. In fact, I could not see anyone, just the bright blaze of the house in front of me crumbling to the ground. It was an eerily beautiful sight, yet one horribly burned into my memory forever.

I began to search around for my car, or at least for someone to tell me where I was and how I got there. I spotted my car, over a 100 yards away, and began to run toward it, almost like I was being chased. the doors were locked, and I couldn't find my keys, so I reached into my pocket for my cellphone. It wasn't there.

What I found instead, was a phone number scribbled in my handwriting, and what appeared to be directions of some sort. I was more confused now than ever, I didn't remember writing any of it, but it was my writing.

I decide i needed to start walking to find someone or something to let me know where I was, so I set off down the street on foot, on a journey that had no real destination.

After nearly 2 hours of walking, the sun had risen, and the cold was wearing me down. It must have been only 25 degrees at the most, and I had no jacket, only a tshirt and jeans. I sat down to try to think and piece things together, but I had no recolection of what had happened. I heard a car coming from behind me, and turned to see who was coming. It was the local Sheriff, and luckily he stopped to give me a ride into town.

He bagan to question me, but his questions made no sense. The speeding, the fleeing, the whole thing was alien to me. I asked him where I was, and he said Grensboro, N.C. This was when things really got crazy.

He told me that sometime after 4am, me and my friend Josh walked into a BP gas station to buy something. He said the police showed up, and we were seen fleeing the store, which held the dead body of the night manager inside. Me and Josh were wanted for murder, and I was promptly placed under arrest.

I was so scared, and had no memory of the night's events. After being held for what seemed like forever, the Sheriff came in to tell me i was being released, because the video obtained from the store had shown the man responsible for the crime, and that we had walked in just 3 minutes after the real murderer had fled the scene. He said we must have panicked, and decided to run ourselves. He apologized, then let me go.

This still left some questions unanswered for me though. Where was Josh, and more importantly, where was I?

I reached into my wallet, to find I still had over $300 on me, so I was given a ride to the local Greyhound station to head up to D.C. What can I say, I still had a game to catch, and I wasn't missing this for the world.

At a stop in Richmond, VA, people were eagerly staring at their video screens in the terminal, watching a breaking news story that made my heart sink. It was the answer I had been searching for. The answer to where my night had taken me. There was video being shown of a police chase, involving me and Josh, which ended in an event seen only in movies. Josh had stopped the car, and got out panicked at what was going on, and took off on foot. He was pursued and captured, taken into custody, and later released with a citation for eluding police. What happened to me? Apparently I was passed out drunk in the car, and came to while he was being chased, and drove off.

I also found out the house I went to, was a house I had mistaken for josh's in my drunkedness, and literally walked right into and went to sleep. The screaming I awoke to was the lady of the house screaming that her ex was burning her house, because he was accusing her of leaving him for me, since he busted in and saw me in her house asleep. It was just a screwed up misconception on mine and his part, but he reacted in the way he saw fit. Instead of killing or beating me, he was gona let me lay there while the house was torched.

My heart sank, and i couldn't believe what had transpired. I called the number on the paper I found in my pocket, and it was Josh's friend's cellphone. He said he ran into me and told me to give it to Josh, along with directions to his house, because I was driving his car, so He knew I knew him. Oddly enough, his house had been right next door to where I had nearly been torched.

At 3:54, just before kickoff, I finally get off the subway, and make my way to FedEx. A completely empty FedEx. Baffled, I began looking around in search of answers, when I asked a passer by what was going on with the game. It was then he informed me that it was December 19th, the game was yesterday. I checked the paper to confirm it, and he was right. Where had my life gone in the past 2 days?

I went to sit down when my cellphone fell out of my cell pocket on my jeans, a pocket I had forgotten I had. I saw I had 17 new messages. They were from my crying wife wondering what had happened to me. I immediately called her, and cried after hearing the joy and love that was in her voice. I told her all that had happened, and she said she had seen it on the news, and that Josh was at our house looking for me. At least everyone was alright, the only good news from the events.

Then as I hung up, I went to stick my phone in a different pocket, and felt another piece of paper. It was a processed ticket stub from the game. I had been to the game, and now a whole new world of mystery began to unravel.

I turned to run across the street to begin making my way back home, when I saw my car, keys in the ignition, with souvenirs inside from the game. A guy came walking up and said "you missed a hell of a game, as he hopped in my car and offered me a ride. When I told him it was my car, he peeled out and left me stranded right there in the lot. To this day, I don't know what happened from December 17th-December 19th of 2005. I never saw my car again, and still have not seen a Redskins game.

Man, it's tough being a fan sometimes.

conclusion in the tailgate


Link to comment
Share on other sites


That has got to be one of the wildest posts and stories I've heard here. And I've been here awhile :)

Tell you what. You just earned yourself a pair of free tickets to a game at FedEx Field this season. Can't promise it'll be Dallas. But you and your buddy can see one you'll actually remember.

Just do me a favor? Don't drink quite so much this time.

That read like a Phillip K. Dick novel. Wow.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

here's the kicker, i just realized the rediculously bad timing of the post, but as much as i wish it was, it is by all means not an april fool's joke. my friend josh just moved back to the beach a few days ago, and he came over tonight with his new girlfriend so i could tell her the story since she didn't believe him. when i was done, she accepted the fact that not only could nobody ever make up a story like that, but 2 people could definitely not make up that same story. we talked for hours about how screwd up it was, and i had to share it with you guys to see what you all thought. sorry for the bad timing. i actually didnt even realize it was april fools until after he said something, because i was painting most of the day today and oblivious to the outside world, but it was indeed a true event. and it truly sucked, but hopefully this season i can go to a game. WITH NO STOPS ALONG THE WAY!!!!!!!!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Show me a link of a report of the murder and the police chase that was all over the news... then i'll believe you.

until then...

No one writes a non-fiction story like that. April fools.


#64........as for a link to the tv report, i wasnt here, so i dont know what station to check for a link, theres a hundred stations, and im not too sure whether it was a national story or not

Link to comment
Share on other sites


#64........as for a link to the tv report, i wasnt here, so i dont know what station to check for a link, theres a hundred stations, and im not too sure whether it was a national story or not

Also, this man is #64


He was shot and stabbed by his wife in a park in Raleigh, not killed running a convenience store in Greensboro.

Still, it was some nice writing.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

i've always been told i should be a writer. i'm assuming at least you guys liked it?

come on, everyone to franklin, drinks on me :cheers:

sadly enough, about 80% of this story is true....all but the police chase and guy driving off in my car.....that was for dramatic effect.

Link to comment
Share on other sites


This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
  • Create New...