Califan007 The Constipated

Q54: What’s the best New Year’s resolution you’ve ever made? Q4: What’s one of your nicknames? How did you end up getting that nickname?

Perhaps history is repeating itself in a way...behold the 2015 Kansas City Chiefs: The 2015 Chiefs started off 1-5 The 2022 Commanders have started off 1-4 Chiefs: won their next 10 straight to make it in the playoffs Commanders: have won 6 of their last 7 Chiefs: living checkdown metric Alex Smith was the starter Commanders: noddle-armed ball of moxie Taylor Heinicke is the starter Chiefs: in 6 of those 10 games, Smith threw between 125 yards and 191 yards Commanders: in 3 of his 6 games, Heinicke threw between 138 yards and 191 yards Chiefs: averaged 144 rushing yards per game during that 10-game stretch Commanders: averaging 144 rushing yards per game during this 7-game stretch Chiefs: 4 of the 5 teams they lost to made the playoffs (Broncos 12-4, Packers 10-6, Bengals 12-4, Vikings 11-5) - their combined winning % is 0.70 Commanders: 4 of the 5 teams they lost to will most likely make the playoffs (Eagles 10-1, Cowboys 8-3, Titans 7-4, Vikings 9-2) - their combined winning % is 0.77 Chiefs: After their 4th loss in a row, their defense held all their remaining opponents under 22 points, and twice allowed only a fg Commanders: After their 4th loss in a row, their defense has held all their remaining opponents under 21 points, and twice kept their opponent to 10 points or less Chiefs: won in the wildcard round 30-0, then lost in the divisional round to the Patriots Commanders: ???

"An illness" didn't ruin last season...COVID did.

^^^ Joel Greenberg, the corrupt Florida tax official who tried to reduce his jail time by telling the FBI that Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-FL) paid for sex with a teenage girl, has been sentenced to 11 years in prison. The hefty sentence comes close to the decade-plus prison time that federal prosecutors requested—and didn’t seem to give credence to his value as a government witness in a dozen other investigations into the fraud and corruption. Sitting in a local jail, Greenberg has been meeting with local, state, and federal investigators for more than a year to rat out his friends. He helped expose Teresa McIntyre, a Small Business Administration employee who broke bad a month into her new job there and eventually admitted to handing out fraudulent COVID loans. He explained the inner workings of a GOP scheme to sway elections by creating non-existent “ghost” candidates, which helped convict Seminole County Republican Party chair Ben Paris. And his evidence gave feds the hammer they brought down on his friend, a former radio shock jock named “Big Joe” Ellicott, who admitted to a bribe and kickback scheme. But none of these cases is as big as the one that has yet to be filed: underage sex trafficking charges against Rep. Matt Gaetz. As The Daily Beast reported exclusively last year, Greenberg wrote a confession letter laying out how the congressman paid him to arrange for sex with multiple women—as well as a girl who was 17 at the time. And as the Beast also revealed, Greenberg’s private Venmo logs showed how the congressman did indeed pay him—and at one point mentioned the teen in a transaction memo. The FBI has that evidence, but the Department of Justice has yet to move on Gaetz. And while The Washington Post reported that the feds are dropping the sex crimes probe, eight sources told us the overall investigation continues. The extent of Greenberg’s cooperation—and the potentially huge case against a sitting congressman—led his defense lawyer to rip the DOJ last week for going so hard on Greenberg and “fiddling away as Rome burns.” Even the federal judge jabbed at prosecutors yesterday in court, according to CNN, which quoted U.S. District Judge Gregory Presnell when he called it “concerning” that the Justice Department has “extensive investigations ongoing with no end in sight.” https://www.thedailybeast.com/florida-rep-matt-gaetzs-associate-joel-greenberg-gets-11-year-prison-sentence

We're gonna need him...

Missed this: Commanders Segment: Inside the NFL | Washington vs Atlanta Falcons - Week 12

Completion % Wentz 62.1 Heinicke 60.2 Yard per attempt Wentz 6.4 Heinicke 6.8 Yard per completion Wentz 10.2 Heinicke 11.3 TD% Wentz 4.3 Heinicke 4.1 INT% Wentz 2.6 Heinicke 2.9 QB Rating Wentz 84.1 Heinicke 82.7 QBR Wentz 32.9 Heinicke 46.9 Does the above mean that Wentz at his worst...is pretty much the same as Heinicke at his best? lol...

Oooh, that does sound fun!

I would have asked him in return "Does any of this show evidence that the revised voting laws in Georgia has strengthened the integrity of the election?" That's the real question. Because failing to suppress the vote doesn't mean that wasn't the goal. It just means they failed.

Q78: Have you ever--or would you ever be interested in--observing a surgery? If so, why and what kind? Q6: What’s something you intended to do today, but didn’t? Why didn't you do it?

Q60: What would your friends say you grumble about most? Q88: Who’s the jolliest person you know? Describe him or her.

Damn. Q2: How many siblings do you have? What’s your birth order? Already taken, try another one...

Q22: Do you regularly use discount or savings coupons, or do you just go ahead and pay regular price on everything? If you don't use coupons, why not?

Fixed 👍 Q10: What books on your shelf are begging to be read? Octopuses can be real jerks... Q96: What items do you currently have stored in the trunk of your car? Already picked by someone else...try another one.

I remember thinking Blow was really good (sheddup lol)...but for some reason can't really remember what actually happened in the movie.

It floored me when I realized how many times I had watched Shawshank Redemption lol... Q84: Who performs more random acts of kindness than anyone else you know?

Q32: What kinds of movies do you most enjoy? Why?

Q97: Which animals scare you most? Why?

Q79: Which movies have you watched over and over again?

I'm an introvert but I never sneak in and find a safe spot, either. Q82: How many hours of sleep do you need each night to feel rested? Q56: How many hours a week do you watch TV? Does it feel like that's too much, or just enough?

I think it has far more to do with Heinicke being much, MUCH better at keeping plays alive with his legs and pocket manipulation. That usually gives receivers/TEs/RBs a little more time to adjust and get open. So on 3rd and long, Heinicke is bouncing around back there, dipping into the pocket and then back out again, bailing a bit left and right and making LBs think he might take off, which gives his players the opportunity to get themselves open. With Wentz, that extra time rarely happened.

Q14: Which do you do more often: hum or whistle?

Q9: Who is the closest friend you’ve ever had? Describe that relationship. Don't worry, this is the easy round...they get more thought-provoking in the next round. Q12: How often do you doodle? What do your doodles usually look like? Feels like people are picking Skins player numbers now lol... Q89: What sound drives you crazy? I do, too...I ****ing hate it.

Sorry, only I get to ask the questions (that's your one freebie lol) Q55: When making an entrance into a social gathering, do you make your presence known so everyone notices you, just walk in and look for someone you know, or sneak in as quietly as possible and find a safe spot? Why?