"I want you to take me like Obama takes our freedoms," Jed whispered. The sound of a Carhart zipper was his only reply."
"The vegan jerky gave him sensations he'd never had. It reminded him of Scout camp, only this time he was the Scoutmaster."
"Seize me!" Ammon moaned, "Set my fertile grassland aflame, and I shall pursue no recourse!"
"He swore an oath. But his wife was far away. And Cletus, hard-bodied and willing, was near. Plus, Cletus had Doritos."