Yomar Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Today I am here to give you some serious hard hitting analysis of the three NFL Draft prospects Sean Taylor, Kellen Winslow and Tommie Harris. First we will review Sean Taylor for the upcoming NFL Draft. Look at this toothpick, he truly sucks donkey ass. No muscles! Not even a spec of pump! Pathetic lamer, he barely broke double digits on the bench press and he is supposed to be the best defensive player in the draft? What is he going to do standing 15 yards away from the line of scrimmage like a puny little girly man? Scare the other team with his flabiness? Listen to me now and believe me later, Sean Taylor is a puny little girly man. Now its time to bring out a special guest to review Kellen Winslow...Kellen Winslow KW: Hey, Yomar! How you doing! Yomar: Yes! do you ever show pity on those flabby loser safeties like Sean Taylor? KW: No! These losers, they need to be disciplined! They're fat, lazy pigs, who should be only dead! You hear me? Dead! Dead! Dead! Yomar: Ya! Ya! Alright. Interesting. Now, tell us, Kellen, what would you do with a girly man who tried to cut your knees? KW2: Here me now, and here me now, girly-man! Don't be thinking I can't come to your house, and pummel your head with a 2x4 and knock some sense into your fat, lazy lard-filled ass! You should be dead! You hear me! Dead, dead, dead, dead!!! [ Yomar subdues KW2] Yomar: Alright. Alright. Enough talk. I'm not here to talk. I'm here to smarten.. [ clap ] ..you up! Alright, Kellen. Alright, thanks for coming down, Kellen. KW2: Okay, I'll see you later. Oh, by the way. Stockar McDougle's cousin Tommie Harris is here today. Yomar: You'd better not be pulling my rock-hard leg you nutty psychopath KW2: He is! Okay, see you later! [ KW2 exits, Tommie Harris enters] TH: Hello, hello. I am here! Yomar: Ya, Tommie, I can't believe how properly pumped up you really are! You are the embodiment of perfect pumpitude! TH: No, no, no.. relax, Yomar, relax. Yomar: Tommie, tell these flabby little know-nothings about Sean Taylor. TH: Oh, Sean Taylor make me sick. [ mimes vomiting ] This is what you have to do. Like this [ demonstrates the proper way to flex his muscles ] That's the way to do it! Look at Sean Taylor, how pitiful loser he is! You know something? I hate the way he plays! What's the matter with him? I mean, I wrestle with large flabby lineman and this girly man stands back there and watches!Oh, come on, he makes me sick! And look at those legs, they look like little skinny sticks! And those buttocks. Soft, like marshmallow. He is lucky I don't have a campfire here in the background. And believe me- What's the matter? Yomar: Its no use Tommie. Compared to you.. we are all losers. And not even the grown-up kind, the little baby losers. You know, you could very easily flick Sean Taylor with your littlest finger, and send him flying across the room until he landed in his own baby poop. But these lamers, they have too much flabbiness between their ears and in their eyes. They can't see the pump right in front of their faces, they think Sean Taylor is the best TH: I know. I know, you're right. But don't be downing yourself too much now. Listen to me now, and beleive me later: it doesn't matter how much you pump up those muscles, as long as you reach the full pumptential. Yomar: Oh.. okay.. 'Sank you. You've given us something to hear now, and something to think about later. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
inmate running the asylum Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Yomar, I'm surprised at you. I thought you knew more about football then this. I mean you write this long diatribe wherein I guess you are saying that Sean Taylor can't play football because he only did 11 reps and must therefore be flabby. Well from what I've seen on film, Taylor weighs 228 lbs, runs like a deer and hits like a ton of bricks. When did the amount of reps a player does, have anything to do with how well he can play football? Fred Smoot is a pretty good cornerback and could only do 1 rep. Most defensive backs at the combine regularly do between 10 to 20 reps. So although not spectacular, Taylor was within that range. For your information, Roy Williams only did 13 reps at the combine in 2002, so I guess according to your theory, Roy Williams can't play worth a dang either. But I remember Marvin Lewis jokingly saying before the draft that if the Skins could somehow land Williams, he would have the Skins defense play with only 10 players on the field. Lewis thought that Williams was that good coming out of college. And he must have been right, because Roy Williams made the pro bowl last year in leading the Dallas defense. Combine results - Roy Williams bench press - 13 reps Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubba9497 Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 When did the amount of reps a player does, have anything to do with how well he can play football? You mean like when you said Gallery was a better LT than Samuels because Samuels only did 19 reps at the combine? :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rfdc Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Man this guy's good! Late Night or "Early" Morning sattire :laugh: I like the part where he flexs, as to what to do and the one about the marshmallows. Nice Job Yomar and thanks for breaking the ice! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yomar Posted April 22, 2004 Author Share Posted April 22, 2004 You know, maybe you thought this post would make me angry; but it only makes me sad. Really, ya. I am sad, you know, because anyone who calls me "diatribe" is really just jealous because his girlfriend looks at me, then looks at him, and realizes she's cuddling up with a little girly-man! Ya. Ya, girly-man. Hear me now and believe me later - but don't think about it ever, because, if you try to think, you might cause a flabulance! Poor little girly-man, alone in his girly-house! Sorry, Mr. Girly-Man, but here's a treat for your girlfriend! [ Yomar flexes his muscles egotistically ] Alright. Oh, and thank you so much for the post. [ puts crumpled post in his mouth and swallows ] Ya! Ya, don't think for a minute I'm not eating it, because believe me I am! That was one delicious piece of girly-man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
inmate running the asylum Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Originally posted by bubba9497 You mean like when you said Gallery was a better LT than Samuels because Samuels only did 19 reps at the combine? :laugh: I never said Gallery is a better LT ONLY because Samuels only did 19 reps. I said Gallery is believed by most GM's and scouts to have more upside and to be in a league with Jonathan Ogden because he is 6-7 or two inches taller than Samuels, much stronger already then Samuels; and more athletic then Samuels. The weakest part of Samuels game is his strength. Evidently that is also the feeling around the league, otherwise the Skins would be able to swap Samuels straight-up EVEN for Gallery. But in that the Skins can't swap Samuels straight up EVEN for Gallery [but would have to throw in their #5 pick as well], their analysis and my opinion seems to be correct. As for Yomar......... I think he's been hitting the sauce tonight. :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yomar Posted April 22, 2004 Author Share Posted April 22, 2004 Ya! Hear me now and believe me later, Inmate! I have much more pump-tential that you do, lamer! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubba9497 Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Originally posted by inmate running the asylum I never said Gallery is a better LT ONLY because Samuels only did 19 reps. I said Gallery is believed by most GM's and scouts to have more upside and to be in a league with Jonathan Ogden because he is 6-7 or two inches taller than Samuels, much stronger already then Samuels; and more athletic then Samuels. The weakest part of Samuels game is his strength. Evidently that is also the feeling around the league, otherwise the Skins would be able to swap Samuels straight-up EVEN for Gallery. But in that the Skins can't swap Samuels straight up EVEN for Gallery [but would have to throw in their #5 pick as well], their analysis and my opinion seems to be correct. You mean your assumption. The Skins have stated, as has Samuels, and his agent, the Skins aren't trading Samuels, and haven't discuseed trading Samuels. Just because some hack thinks a rookie is better than a Pro Bowl LT who is in his mid twenties is no proof he couldn't have been traded straight up for the #2 pick. and yes your main argument that Gallery was better (even though he hasn't played a down yet in the NFL) was you compared his & Samuels bench press reps during their combine workouts. :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
inmate running the asylum Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Originally posted by bubba9497 You mean your assumption. The Skins have stated, as has Samuels, and his agent, the Skins aren't trading Samuels, and haven't discused trading Samuels. Just because some hack thinks a rookie is better than a Pro Bowl LT who is in his mid twenties is no proof he couldn't have been traded straight up for the #2 pick. and yes your main argument that Gallery was better (even though he hasn't played a down yet in the NFL) was you compared his & Samuels bench press reps during their combine workouts. :laugh: Well if you consider Al Davis a "hack," you will get no argument from me there. Actually, I consider Al Davis more of a "fruitcake." I'm well aware that the Skins said they were not trading Samuels and I never advocated they should trade him, unless it was a straight up EVEN trade of Samuels for Gallery. But its more than just MY assumption, because the Skins will never be able to trade Samuels straight up for Gallery, otherwise both teams would have jumped at the chance alreadyl. So I don't see the point you are trying to make, when its obvious this is a fact borne out by the circumstances. So what if I compared Samuels weak 19 reps in bench press to Gallery's strength. Everyone who knows football, knows that the weakest part of Samuels game is his strength and lack of weight or bulk. I also said that most GM's, scouts and draft experts consider Gallery to have more upside than Samuels -- not that Samuels is a bad player. And if we took a poll at Extremeskins as to who the fans would rather have straight up -- Samuels or Gallery -- the great majority of fans who have b!tched about Samuels play the last two years would choose Gallery hands down. So the point and argument you are trying to make again is pointless. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kappaluvacee Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 easy guys, the draft is just two days away............It will have the answers you seek. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubba9497 Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 nice try but again you're :owned: vast experts? funny Kiper, Clayton, Mort (even Peter King) said it would have been stupid, and shot down the FALSE RUMOR. Davis never said squat, and please list your vast gm's and scouts :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
inmate running the asylum Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Originally posted by bubba9497 nice try but again you're :owned: vast experts? funny Kiper, Clayton, Mort (even Peter King) said it would have been stupid, and shot down the FALSE RUMOR. Davis never said squat, and please list your vast gm's and scouts :laugh: Apparently, you can't read. Everyone said it would be stupid to trade Samuels for Gallery in ADDITION to giving up our #5 pick in the trade. And I agree this would be stupid. But no one said it would be stupid to trade Samuels for Gallery straight up or in an EVEN trade. So again I don't what the frig you are talking about as usual. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CLiNT0N P0RTiS Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 This is funny... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubba9497 Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 So again I don't what the frig you are talking about as usual. that goes without saying Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. S Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 im surprised you didnt make fun of Tommie Harris's size either then, he's pretty small for a DT. Besides, watch KWII just start mouthing off and getting suspended a few games or something. Yeh, i'd still want Sean Taylor over any of them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yomar Posted April 22, 2004 Author Share Posted April 22, 2004 Tommie Harris is a specimen of perfect pumpitude not flabulation Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Om Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Redskin Posted April 22, 2004 Share Posted April 22, 2004 well I thought it was pretty funny. I can hear them doing the voices and all. nice yomar Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Yomar Posted April 23, 2004 Author Share Posted April 23, 2004 Originally posted by Om prime examples of pumpitude Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oldskool Posted April 23, 2004 Share Posted April 23, 2004 Originally posted by Om Governator! :point2sky Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skins26 Posted April 23, 2004 Share Posted April 23, 2004 I honestly dont know what the hell is going on in this thread. But it appears like everyone is completely losing their minds. Its funny though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
miragv Posted April 23, 2004 Share Posted April 23, 2004 So stupid how some think bench numbers tells you if someone can play or not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RDSKNfaithfull Posted April 23, 2004 Share Posted April 23, 2004 Originally posted by miragv So stupid how some think bench numbers tells you if someone can play or not. Really, I guess we should move Sultan ahead of Clinton now because of his great Bench Press:rolleyes: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tvan Posted April 23, 2004 Share Posted April 23, 2004 I'm going to pop some corn and grab a soda.. Let me know if I miss anything...:mmm: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chachie Posted April 23, 2004 Share Posted April 23, 2004 Yomar: Its no use Tommie. Compared to you.. we are all losers. And not even the grown-up kind, the little baby losers. You know, you could very easily flick Sean Taylor with your littlest finger, and send him flying across the room until he landed in his own baby poop etc..etc..etc.:laugh: :notworthy :laugh: Yomar: You got me falling on the floor over here. My face hurt from smiling by the time I was done reading that. Good stuff and just what the doctor ordered for cutting through the fog of rumors and impatience. Keep it coming.:applause: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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