Destino Posted March 25, 2013 Share Posted March 25, 2013 Why do we live in a blame the victim society? If you say that people are blaming the victim, a statement that carries a heavy emotional charge, do you believe that overhearing a rude comment rises to that level? Personally I don't think there is a victim and attacker in this situation. Overhearing an inappropriate comment does not make a person victim. Questioning the response doesn't suggest the victim is being blamed. No one has said she deserved to hear the words dongles and forking used in a sexual manner. What if she had been raped and tweeted a pic of her rapist. Now rape is illegal, so its certainly against the code of conduct of the conference. Would we still be saying "well she deserves to be fired because she violated the code of conduct"? I hope not. Thank God she wasn't raped, but this is not a nice precedent.And I see you've taken the emotional charge of "blame the victim" all the way to a rape comparison. This is unreasonable. The way I see it, comments saying that the way a victim reports being a victim only leads to victims not wanting to report on being a victim. So if you think she handled this situation inappropriately, then what's next. Are you really thinking about correcting the problem?I believe in professionalism and sound judgement. There is a way to deal with every problem and there are reactions that can make things worse. Being offended does not mean that any reaction is justifiable and correct, even if the initial offense is entirely reasonable and proven. Crude jokes are not acceptable in a professional environment and employees need to be made to understand that, using social media to blow this up isn't a professional response however. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gbear Posted March 25, 2013 Share Posted March 25, 2013 I was always thought sexual harassment is defined by what is done after somebody is told to stop. Heck, as far as I know somebody can ask another person out at work. From what I've read, roughly half of married couples met at work. So obviously some sexual activity is permitted under the law. In this case, I didn't see any attempt made by her to say she was offended by the comments prior to sending their pictures out, destroying one guy's job. I'm not defending their comments, merely pointing out her taking matters into her own hands had damages far exceeding what would have happened in most courts or HR departments whether they were headed by men or women. I didn't see anything to indicate they even knew somebody else was listening much less talking to her. It seems the professional thing to do would have been to ask them to cut it out. It looks as though she has been fired for taking the unprofessional approach. Those claiming it was justified are to my mind, missing the unprofessional image she gave herself and by extension her employer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Special K Posted March 25, 2013 Share Posted March 25, 2013 The men were wrong in their actions. She was certainly wrong in her reporting of the incident. I don't understand people who feel the need to go full vigilante on these types of issues prior to directing their concerns/complaints through the proper channels. She probably felt like she was advancing the feminist cause and I'm sure there will be a lot of women who feed into that. However, I am of the opinion that displaying unprofessional (and passive-aggressive as PB noted) behavior in response to a concerning situation actually does a disservice to women everywhere. IMO, she propagates the stereotype that women are passive-aggressive ****es who can't handle these types of situations with emotional maturity; instead, they'll take a picture and post it on facebook or twitter like a high school teenager would do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alexey Posted March 25, 2013 Share Posted March 25, 2013 Why do we live in a blame the victim society? People who are saying it's OK if she would have just gone to the authorities, or asked them to be nice, then what? Is she supposed to sit around wondering if things will really change? Is she supposed to be an adult and just live with it because that's what she should expect in a room dominated by men? I mean? I really don't get the partial blame on her. I mean, if anything, I wish she had done more. I kinda wish she'd have recorded the actual incident so there was no denying what happened. The choice is not between doing what she did or doing nothing, and a room where there are more men than women is not a room dominated by men. What if she had been raped and tweeted a pic of her rapist. Now rape is illegal, so its certainly against the code of conduct of the conference. Would we still be saying "well she deserves to be fired because she violated the code of conduct"? I hope not. Thank God she wasn't raped, but this is not a nice precedent. I do not think it is appropriate to bring up rape in this context. The way I see it, comments saying that the way a victim reports being a victim only leads to victims not wanting to report on being a victim. So if you think she handled this situation inappropriately, then what's next. Are you really thinking about correcting the problem? We do want to discourage people from taking pictures of other people and posting them on Twitter alongside some accusations. In vast majority of cases this is not a good way to handle an issue. It could be, in some cases, but most of the time it's not. Yes change is hard and I think it is important to ruffle some feathers somtimes or even break the law to get visibility and kick-start discussions of things. It takes a stunt to get people talking. Now, discussions about kinds, effects, etc of stunts are great. Let's talk about that... but i get a sense that you are not appreciating perspectives that share all of your concerns yet do not think that the approach selected by Ms. Richards' is helpful. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Botched Posted March 25, 2013 Share Posted March 25, 2013 The men were wrong in their actions.She was certainly wrong in her reporting of the incident. I don't understand people who feel the need to go full vigilante on these types of issues prior to directing their concerns/complaints through the proper channels. She probably felt like she was advancing the feminist cause and I'm sure there will be a lot of women who feed into that. However, I am of the opinion that displaying unprofessional (and passive-aggressive as PB noted) behavior in response to a concerning situation actually does a disservice to women everywhere. IMO, she propagates the stereotype that women are passive-aggressive ****es who can't handle these types of situations with emotional maturity; instead, they'll take a picture and post it on facebook or twitter like a high school teenager would do. I agree. If she had just stayed in the kitchen, this never would have happened. :poke: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Predicto Posted March 25, 2013 Share Posted March 25, 2013 the backlash against her has been insane, and all too common for women who speak out against misogyny: she has received an uncountable number of death threats, rape threats, and various combinations thereof. her online presences have been attacked and hacked, and extremely vitriolic and hateful stuff about her has been written in the comments section of every article that has covered this story. The misogynists at 4chan have gone after her with a vengeance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Destino Posted March 25, 2013 Share Posted March 25, 2013 The misogynists at 4chan have gone after her with a vengeance. The reaction from the internet is far more alarming than the crude jokes or Adria reaction to it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.