KSK.com: White History Month - The Top 10 White Owners in NFL History(Parody)

[EvilMonkeyBoy]

Kissing Suzy Kolber and PFTCommenter "The Vocie of the Commen NFL Fan" put out an awesome list for his annual celebration of "White History Month"

http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2014/07/white-history-month-top-10-white-owners-in-the-history-of-the-nfl.html#ixzz38A1U0YNz

My favorites: 

 

 

5. Residents of Green Bay Wisconsin

Buying stock in a football team that you technicaly dont own falls somewere just north of skipping work to wait in line for a cronut on sound investment stragtegys in white history. That said, willingly donating $250 bucks to your team just so your owners can have more money is literally the opposite of socialism so congrats to the city of Green Bay for collectively owning the Packers but really not really owning them, just paying for them.

and

 

 

 

1. Jerry Jones

People have been complaining that the Cowboys get way to much coverage from ESPN for years now, but if theres one guy in America who knows how to deal with unreasonable intrest rates its Jerry. The stadium has a retractable roof so that sometimes God can watch the team play and other times he can use his omnipotince to communicate directly through Deion Sanders to college recruits. I have some fun with it and call ATT&T stadium “Jonestown” because it filled with empty promises and makes me want to kill myself. Really shocked that he turn down multiple endorsement overtures from Kool Aid and sodium cyanide.

But Jerry Jones gets number one on this list on account’ve hes a job creator through and through giving work to otherwise unemployable people like Wade Philips, Bobby Carpenter and his own son in law.

Don't know how I feel about Jerry Jones being at the top of a "Best" owners list but in this case I'll take it with no complaint.

[s0crates]

Whoever wrote that needs a proofreader.

[G.A.C.O.L.B.]

Whoever wrote that needs a proofreader.

It's written like that on purpose. He's a "PFTCommentator". That's the schtick

[Dan T.]

Whoever wrote that needs a proofreader.

 

 

He does.  It's JMS.

[s0crates]

It's written like that on purpose. He's a "PFTCommentator". That's the schtick

Guess I missed the joke.

[Dan T.]

He jabs Cleveland:

 

By now youve heard that a homeless guy told Jimmy Haslam to draft Johnny Football to the Browns. Homeless guys making important choices for your city in Cleveland is also known as “election day”.
 

[Ghost of]

7. Jim Irsay

 

The story of his liver as well as his life is what he hasnt done, and Irsay has put together two decades of success by not drafting Ryan Leaf and then not drafting Robert Griffin.

 

 

 

**** this dude. 

[EvilMonkeyBoy]

**** this dude. 

He's channeling the voices of the entire comment section of ProFootballTalk, what do you expect him to say?

He's fell in love with Trent Murphy though: https://twitter.com/PFTCommenter/status/492361463663558656

 

 

Whoever wrote that needs a proofreader.

Heh. If you had trouble with that, try reading his novel Goodell Vs Obama: The Battle for the Future of the NFL:

http://www.amazon.com/Goodell-vs-Obama-Battle-Future-ebook/dp/B00KLCZMXC

 

[Bubble Screen]

**** this dude.

Like it or not, that was accurate.