Too bad I can't predict the lottery...Egg on Face Update

[Ghost of]

I hope I don't sound too frank here, Ghost- but it sure seems like she's on her way out. She's just trying figure out if it's safe to bolt. Some people can't let go of the old hand until they have a firm grasp on the new one. It's a dirty tactic and indicates co-dependency but it's real and it's not rare.

No, you're not too frank at all. I hope I've established on the board a reputation for being able to speak candidly and accept candid conversation. I am going back and forth on this. I suppose I am going to force a resolution very soon. It disappoints me and I could still be very wrong. I mean, someone goes from being a bit distant but still looking forward to V-Day and being good and sweet and maybe hoping for that renewal---hell, maybe I've been reading too much into it but I don't think so, I think I'm good at reading the differences in interaction.

So, I think, as absurd as it sounds, I will let her go by forcing her hand. It will probably strike her as unfair and maybe she is innocent (or mostly so) in this case. But I KNOW that if the same thing happened but our positions reversed, I would have energetically and with affection denied that I had anything to do with it, assert my caring for her (or anyone) and reassure them I would never, as a matter of personal honor and my esteem for them, engage in that kind of cowardice. And I would, by the way, immediately upon reading their message of distress, re-friend/rel. status them, to reassure them. That she didn't is curious to me, even if she is thinking of deleting her account.

So, chach and Mad Mike, I appreciate the words of warning. I think the best thing to do is force the issue, as that's the only thing that gets most of these 'indirect' cowards to open up and say something. I think the issue sometimes, isn't even "lying" as much as an obstinate refusal to address emotional shifts, truths and down periods for a relationship. It creates pressures and resentments that need not be.

Then again, I could be wrong and she could prove it. But I am reluctant to sacrifice my dignity in such a project (dignity not meaning that I not confront her and force the issue, but that I don't play the fool and hold on and passively accept unspoken and unpleasant facts simply to appear unshaken.)

Thanks!

[MissU28]

Not that girl, although I did learn such interesting facts as her class thinks that they are Jersey Shore cast members and she likes to whoop up on kids playing basketball.

ahahhaah....yes, and those are the types of statuses that my boyfriend makes fun of. I'm a nerd.

[The Brave Little Toaster Oven]

ahahhaah....yes, and those are the types of statuses that my boyfriend makes fun of. I'm a nerd.

pick on someone your own size...I challenge you to basketball match :pfft: