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OT-How to speak politically correct


88Comrade2000

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Here's a humorous email that made the rounds at work today. This was initially sent by a female to other females but the males also got a hold of it.

:How to Speak about women and be politically correct

-she is not a babe or a chick- she is a BREASTED AMERICAN

-she is not a screamer or moaner- she is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE

-she is not Easy- she is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE

-she is not dumb- she is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION HIGHWAY

-she is not an airhead- she is REALITY IMPAIRED

-she is not horny- she is SEXUALLY FOCUSED

-she does not get drunk or tipsy- she gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED

-she does not nag you- she becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE

-she does not have breast implants- she is MEDICALLY ENHANCED

How to speak about men and be politically correct

-he does not have a beer gut- he has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY

-he is not a bad dancer- he is OVERLY CAUCASIAN

-he does not get lost all the time- he INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS

-he is not balding- he is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION

-he does not get falling down drunk- he becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL

-he does not act like a total *** - he develops a case of RECTAL CRANIAL INVERSION

-he is not a male chauvinist pig- he has SWINE EMPATHY

-he is not afraid of commitment- he is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED

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Alright guys ... that's enough!!!

I live in NC and went to school at Appalachain State University (alma mater of your favorite ex-Skin and mine ... Matt Stevens). People (at least in this area) of the Appalachains are no different from anyone else and I, for one, am EXTREMELY offended by your insensitive remarks!!! You can probably find Rednecks in every state, including Alaska and Hawaii, and furthermore ...

OK, OK ... I'm just kidding. It's almost impossible to offend me, though Deion and Norv managed regularly. I just always wanted to know what it felt like to write one of those scathing, PC, "I'm offended"-type responses.

Didn't do much for me, actually. Cheers!

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I am offended by the Appalachian remark. I was so miffed when I read I threw my mouse across the room and almost hit my Wife/Cousin.

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As always, my opinions do not reflect the opinions of management and are based on ficticious opinions. Similarities to any opinion living or dead is completely unintentional.

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