Morning Wood Posted August 9, 2004 Share Posted August 9, 2004 Hello all, just wanted to take a moment on this greatest of days to stress the importance of this preseason game. Obviously, great emphasis has been put on the game itself, but I'd like to bring to the forefront of thought the equal importance that we all have placed upon us individually as fans. It has been months since football season was alive and kicking, therefore the preseason is also our time to practice our game day routine. There is much to consider, and now is the time to work out all the bugs... Frothy brew - I can't stress how important beverage decision is. Think about this now, if you switch your brand midseason you run the risk of altering the outcome of the Redskin universe, and does anyone really want that on their conscience?. Also, do you go for quality or quantity? (or if your very seasoned, and have a better paycheck than I, both) Refrigeration - The fridge or the cooler? If going the refrigerator route, now is the time to make sure that temperature control is at the proper beverage coolant level. If going with the latter, it is imperative that you work out ahead of time the tetris-ing of your bottles in the cooler for maximum icing. Edibles - What we consume during the course of a game is paramount. If you don't know your hot wing capacity before time, the effects could be disastrous. No one here wants to be caught one wing short in a crucial situation. The Missus (or Mister, depending) - This one is a toughie. We've all been there, and it has made us all go berserk. Picture this, its the fourth quarter, fourth and three, we're down by six, there's 1:12 on the game clock and we're goin for it... QB lines up under center... and RIGHT THEN our beautiful significant other, who we love with all of our heart and soul, chooses this moment to unleash a tirade of "blah blahs & yadda yaddas & other assorted unimportant mind numbing gibberish" that could easily have been saved for discussion for the pillow talk following the post-game sex. We absolutely MUST prepare for this inevitable occurrence. Better to have a plan ahead of time than risk a potentially very ugly situation during a game when it REALLY matters. Rehearse your auto responses now. Know them like the back of your hand. I also recommend learning the art of mental blocking. To all the new parents in the house - I include myself in this as I have an 11 month old daughter (first child) who will begin her journey down the path of enlightenment this evening. Now is the time to practice those "no-look" diaper changes. (Incidentally, this is the portion of preseason training that frightens me the most. If I don't execute this play flawlessly during EVERY game, my season could quickly go down the.. well, the crapper) And finally, know your digestive system's tendencies. How many times have you stepped back into the room after a "necessary departure" only to be greeted with, "Dude, you ain't gonna believe what just happened!!!!!!". Learn your pain tolerance now. Get your game plan together. Nobody here wants to be dealing with a bladder cramp, nor do we wish to be prarie-doggin on game day. Here's to a great season. GO SKINS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan T. Posted August 9, 2004 Share Posted August 9, 2004 EXCELLENT pointers, Mr. Morning Wood. This post is a must-read for all true fans. The best fan is the well prepared fan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pez Posted August 9, 2004 Share Posted August 9, 2004 Fortunately... 1) No kids..... 2) Season tickets... (no shortage of food or beer at the game) 3) Wife is with me at the game and is usually screaming her head off for our beloved skins. Unfortunately... Post game sex has to wait till we get home (lets face it, who has found a decent place at the stadium) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sippin2020 Posted August 9, 2004 Share Posted August 9, 2004 Excellent post. These are all very important things to consider before the regular season begins. I would like to add, if I may, tailgating musts for those of us that will be at the games. If you live in NOVA, it is imperative that you leave your house by 9:30 am for a 1:00 game. This will give you plenty of time to slow cook your brats and shish-kabobs, as well as imbibe enough beer so you don't needlessly spend $6 a pop in the stadium. (I recommend a flask of your favorite liquor and a $4 coke as a mixer). Buy food/drinks the day before. No need to waste time trying to find the burgers/dogs/ketchup/mustard/plates/forks/etc... at 9:00am on a Suday morning, especially after going hard Saturday night. Bring a football. Bring chairs. Bring your tickets. (All have been forgotten in the past, not fun). Most importantly....Bring it on! HTTR! ~sippin2020 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan T. Posted August 9, 2004 Share Posted August 9, 2004 I would add that it's important to prep the Barcolounger. Check that it's in proper position for the best screen view. Fine tune the handle that propels the foot rest. A balky lever can cost precious seconds when you need to retract the foot rest for a mid-game dash to the facilities. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morning Wood Posted August 9, 2004 Author Share Posted August 9, 2004 Now see people, this is what I'm talkin about... TEAMWORK. Please by all means, add your concerns to the list. We as fans need to be prepared, and we can only aid each other with our comments. Its a marathon, not a sprint. Time to get in shape folks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan T. Posted August 9, 2004 Share Posted August 9, 2004 Each year the HOF Game serves as a good benchmark reminder to replace the batteries in the remote control. Fresh batteries for a fresh season. . . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seanskins Posted August 9, 2004 Share Posted August 9, 2004 I think I have all the bases covered, but one thing that has not been mentioned is the crucial game taping. Everyone on this board must make sure the tape is rewound to the fullest and the remote has fresh batteries. We can ill afford to miss the end or beginning of the game due to remote malfunctions and/or tape shortages. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan T. Posted August 9, 2004 Share Posted August 9, 2004 Make sure there are ample non-breakable, scuff-resistant projectiles within arm's reach of the Barcolounger for hurling at the screen in response to a crappy call from a Redskins-hating referee. Here's a list for your convenience: ACCEPTABLE Pillow Nerf ball Ice cube Cat Empty beer can PROBLEMATIC Remote control Brass bookend Fireplace tool Beer bottle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mister Happy Posted August 9, 2004 Share Posted August 9, 2004 Health tip: If you snack on junk food during the game, drink a lot of water afterwards. It neutralizes the digestive juices and washes the food down faster, so it is less likely to turn into fat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan T. Posted August 9, 2004 Share Posted August 9, 2004 Related health tip: Pace yourself. A good rule of thumb - one beer per Skins' offensive series. Though I almost died of cirrhosis during the Shottenhimer regime with all those 3 and outs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wetredhead Posted August 9, 2004 Share Posted August 9, 2004 good thought and I think your right no good places for sex in the stadium. Too bad would make the day complete Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sydshobob Posted August 9, 2004 Share Posted August 9, 2004 Originally posted by Morning Wood To all the new parents in the house - I include myself in this as I have an 11 month old daughter (first child) who will begin her journey down the path of enlightenment this evening. Now is the time to practice those "no-look" diaper changes. My studies have shown that an infant can actually go 3-4 hours with absolutely no attention at all, if need be. My soon to be 4 year old learned over the last few years that the chances of getting fed, changed, played with during Redskin games was pretty slim. And yes, most TV's can be turned up loud enough to drown out the cries of small to medium-sized children. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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