BrokenNewz:Redskin's Coach Replaced With Steve Spurrier Bobblehead

[TK]

http://www.brokennewz.com/displaystory.asp_Q_storyid_E_658redskinshead

Redskin's Coach Replaced With Steve Spurrier Bobblehead

12/2/2003 - Ironman Klauss

In a move that is hoped to both improve the team's bottom line and bring a culture of winning back to the nation's capital, Washington Redskin's coach Dan Snyder has reportedly replaced head coach Steve Spurrier with a push-button quote generating bobblehead. The bobblehead looks like Spurrier and has the same Southern accent. In this Broken Newz exclusive, BN sports reporter Iron Man Klaus interviewed the bobblehead.

Klaus: Coach bobblehead, your team lost yet another game last night. Once again a game you were leading in the fourth quarter slipped away. How do you plan to turn things around?

Bobblehead: Yep, th' game git away fum us agin. Got to larn to put games away in this league.

Klaus: The Redskins gave up 120 yards in penalties, has the early-season penalty bug bit the team again?

Bobblehead: Yep, wail, we tell th' guys in practice that ya got ta play within the rules, ya got ta have discipline. I cain't fine 'em, th' union won't allow, but they got ta play within the rules.

Klaus: Once again the team passed on %60 of plays from scrimmage. Do you feel the running game will become an important part of the offense next year?

Bobblehead: Yep, Yep, ya cain't win in this league if ya cain't run the ball. Course, we got good receivers, Gardner played good, LC (Laveraneus Coles) made some caitches fo us, but we done had some trouble gettin the push up front wheyan we rayan.

Klaus: Patrick Ramsey sat out yesterday, when do you hope to have him back?

Bobblehead: Paitrick want ta play, he does, but we gotta let him heal up good and get healthy. He gots a bone or somethin' in the foot, just don't heal quick and hurts like chiggers on your ding-dong.

Klaus: I notice this interview is nearly identical to one we held back in October. Is that because you are a bobblehead or because the team hasn't improved?

Bobblehead: Evry one of our guys plays to win, that's why we here. We got to get big plays out of our big play guys, is all.

Klaus: You didn't answer my question.

In other team developments, owner Dan Snyder is reportedly in negotiations with the Chicago Bears in a bid to acquire rights to the hit song, "The Bears Still Suck."