21KO Posted August 6, 2006 Share Posted August 6, 2006 got this from another board.. :laugh: I have Dalmatians, so I was buying a large bag of Purina at Wal-Mart one day and was in line to check out. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. On impulse, I told her "no" but that I was starting The Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital the last time I was on the diet but I HAD lost 50 pounds before I awakened in the Intensive Care Unit with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is that you load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry plus the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try the diet again. I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story. Horrified, she asked me if I'd ended up in the ER because I'd been poisoned by the Purina. I told her "No, actually I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
panel Posted August 6, 2006 Share Posted August 6, 2006 funny, would have been extremly funny if I was there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Raub Posted August 6, 2006 Share Posted August 6, 2006 Ha....now that's funny. Can you really lose weight that way? :paranoid: :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tarhog Posted August 6, 2006 Share Posted August 6, 2006 :laugh: I've got a similar one I sucker people into. I work at a hospital. So I start with 'hey, did you guys hear about the little boy that was born over the weekend that was born without any eyelids?'. Of course, they're all enthralled 'No - I didn't hear', 'Oh my goodness!', etc.... 'What happened to him???' Well, I tell them, luckily for the little boy, a nationally-known pediatric plastic surgeon was in the area for a conference and agreed to help. Apparently this guys specializes in this, because he circumsized the tiny little boy, then used the skin to fashion him two little eyelids. Then you wait. 'So is the little boy going to be okay???' 'Yes. They say he'll be fine. Of course, the doctor says he will be ****-eyed for life'. Its a beautiful thing :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
21KO Posted August 6, 2006 Author Share Posted August 6, 2006 'Yes. They say he'll be fine. Of course, the doctor says he will be ****-eyed for life'. :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ashburnskinsfan Posted August 6, 2006 Share Posted August 6, 2006 Of course, the doctor says he will be ****-eyed for life'. "****-eyed" needs to be censored? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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