PleaseBlitz's drunk thread is a goldmine:
"I sell crack to small children." - PleaseBlitz
"People in Volvos should all die." - PleaseBlitz
"how many fingers do u have?" - meetST
"I believe that in his younger days, Mr T didnt give a **** about the fool, but now that he is older and wiser, he mayy indeed pity him." - PleaseBlitz