wbar3383 Posted August 23, 2010 Share Posted August 23, 2010 Found in the comment section here. http://voices.washingtonpost.com/redskinsinsider/trent-williams/trent-williams-may-need-help-p.html#more suliman215 post wonder who dug these up, yah they are old, but funny Q: What's Jerry Jones biggest concern A: Does Bail Money count against the Salary Cap? Q: Did you hear, the Dallas Cowboys adopted a new "Honor System"; A: Yes your Honor, No your Honor. Q: Why can't Michael Irvin get into a huddle on the field anymore? A: It is a parole violation for him to associate with known felons. Q: What do you call a drug ring in Dallas? A: The huddle. Q: Did you know the Cowboys had a 12 and 5 season this year. A: 12 arrests, 5 convictions. Q: How do you get a Cowboy to stand up? A: Say "Will the defendant please rise." Q: What do you say to a Cowboy in a suit? A: Will the defendant please rise. Q: Hey, did you hear who the Cowboys hired as their new defensive coordinator? A: Johnny Cochran. Q: Four Dallas Cowboys in a car, who's driving? A: The police. Q: How do the Dallas Cowboys spend their first week at training camp? A: Studying the Miranda Rights. Q: Did you hear about the fire at the Cowboys' library facilities? A: Both books were burned, and one of them had not even been colored in yet. Q: How many people does it take to beat the Cowboys? A: Only 1 - Barry Switzer Q: Why can't Micheal Irvin get into a huddle on the football field? A: It's a parole violation to associate with known felons. Q: What do you call it, when a Dallas Cowboy goes on vacation? A: Time off for good behavior. Q: Why does Texas Stadium have Astroturf? A: To keep the fans from grazing during games. Q: How do you make Deion Sanders slower than a snail? A: Call a pass route through a metal detector and wait for him to remove him jewelry. Jerry Jones was really upset with Irvin for the hotel room incident. After all, Irvin did get caught with coke instead of Pepsi. Q: What do you call a beautiful girl in Dallas? A: A tourist. Q: Why wasn't Jesus born in Dallas? A: Because God couldn't find three wise men. Q: What do you call a Cowboys fan with half a brain? A: Gifted. Q: How can you tell if a Cowboys fan has been using the computer? A: There's white-out on the screen. Q: Why did Michael Irvin get so excited when he finished his jigsaw puzzle in 6 months. A: Because on the box it said From 2-4 years. Q: If you see a Cowboys fan on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him? A: It might be your bicycle. Q: Why did the Cowboys fan climb the chain link fence? A: To see what was on the other side. Q: How do you do the Dallas Cowboys' version of the Macarena? A: Stand a foot away from the wall Place one hand on the wall, and then the other. Spread one leg, then the other. Place one hand behind your head, and then the other. Place one hand behind your back, and then the other. Have the policeman handcuff one hand, then the other. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
penasquito Posted August 23, 2010 Share Posted August 23, 2010 First, thank you for the trip to 1996. Second, its amazing how many blond and/or Polish jokes can be adapted to apply to football. but the best Cowboy joke of all time is... Two boys are playing football in the Golden Gate Park when one is attacked by a Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy rips off a board of the nearby fence, wedges it down the dog's collar and twists, breaking the dog's neck. A reporter who is strolling by sees the incident, and rushes over to interview the boy. "'Forty Niners' fan saves friend from vicious animal", he starts writing in his notebook. "But I'm not a Niners fan," the boy replies. "'Oakland Raiders' fan rescues friend from horrific attack," says the reporter as he writes in his notebook. "I'm not a Raiders fan either," the boy says. "Then what are you?" the reporter askes. "I'm a Cowboys fan!!!" the boy says proudly. The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes, "Redneck **** kills family pet!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SOCOandSKINS Posted August 24, 2010 Share Posted August 24, 2010 those were some funny jokes HTTR Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SWFLSkins Posted August 24, 2010 Share Posted August 24, 2010 Three Cowboys fans all decked out in Romo sits to pee Cowboys garb walk into a bar during the SuperBowl, Bartenders says, "What is this a joke" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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