Election 2024 & Presidential Race: Demented WannaBe Dictator Trump vs President Biden

[Dan T.]

A bit of symmetry. 

 

- It's 2 years from the election.

-This happened 2 years ago:

 

 

 

[Dan T.]

Please excuse this trip down memory lane.  I needed a laugh or two today...

 

 

[Jabbyrwock]

2 minutes ago, Dan T. said:

Please excuse this trip down memory lane.  I needed a laugh or two today..

 

I almost peed over "There's a cremation center across the street, and one time their power went out and we let them use our mulcher...but I don't know if I'd call it an event"

[The Evil Genius]

 

[Riggo-toni]

Yeah, and all so he could score a tax break.

[LD0506]

[PleaseBlitz]

He got fired, stole a bunch of stuff on his way out the door, and now he's reapplying for his old job back. 

[redskinss]

6 hours ago, Dan T. said:

 

 

Added. Thanks.

How about tsar tsar binks?

 

He's a Russian stooge who wants to be a dictator but is also a bumbling moron.

[Dan T.]

15 minutes ago, redskinss said:

How about tsar tsar binks?

 

He's a Russian stooge who wants to be a dictator but is also a bumbling moron.

Nice. Added. 

[JCB]

^^^

 

Shocked but also not shocked to find out this is actually a thing:

 

https://www.thewrap.com/morning-joe-trump-jar-jar-binks-comparison/

[China]

Trump's paymaster

 

On Tuesday night, Trump announced he was running for president for the third time. The coverage of his announcement was broadly critical, focusing on the poor results of the candidates he endorsed in the 2022 midterms. Reports also noted some other issues complicating Trump's run, including his role in fomenting an insurrection and the federal criminal investigation into his handling of classified documents. 

 

These stories virtually ignored one of the most significant developments since Trump left the White House: his expanding financial relationship with Saudi Arabia. Since Trump left office, entities controlled by the Saudi government, a repressive regime responsible for the murder of U.S.-based journalist Jamal Khashoggi, have sent billions to Trump and his family members. 

 

Trump's candidacy for president raises the prospect of a major party nominee that is on the payroll of a foreign government.

 

Click on the link for the full article

[Larry]

4 hours ago, China said:

Trump's candidacy for president raises the prospect of a major party nominee that is on the payroll of a foreign government.

 

They mean "other than Russia"?  

[The Evil Genius]

Very stable genius work here.

 

 

[China]

 

[Die Hard]

8 hours ago, China said:

 

I can’t wait until the day they perform an autopsy on Trump… and share the findings of his brain. 

 

[Fan since a Fetus]

26 minutes ago, Die Hard said:

I can’t wait until the day they perform an autopsy on Trump… and share the findings of his brain. 

 

Sorry, but you won’t get your wish. you can’t find something that isn’t there. 

 

if it is there, it will be the smoothest brain you’ve ever seen. There will be a total of 7 creases. One each for the deadly sins

[88Comrade2000]

 

[Cooked Crack]

Lol ok

 

[Larry]

Odds of Pence making it through one state's GOP primary without being killed?  

[China]

On 11/16/2022 at 9:43 AM, Dan T. said:

Since the **** stain on America has announced his run, this list, diligently amassed for all good intentions, will come in handy over the next couple of years:

 

Donald Trump,

 
- Mango Mussolini

- Girth Vader

- Traffic Cone of Treason

- Tsar Tsar Binks

- Penis Pumpkinhead

- Tan Dump Lord

- Eric’s Dad

-The Count of Mostly Crisco

-Mara-Lardo

-Tangerine Ball Bag

- The Quarter Flounder

- Walker: Taxes Evader

- Floridian Fondler

- Scooby Coup

- Dolt 45

- Tangerine Palpatine

- Traffic Cone of Treason

- Slob Father

- Lard Father

- Fraud Father

- Voldemoron

- Tighty-Whitey Bulger

- The Danger Yam

- Butternut Berlusconi

- Vanity Manatee

- YMCA Hole

- Penis Pumpkinshead

- Dingus Khan

- Sir Eats-a-Lot

- Fatty Kruger

- Clownigula

- Hair Farce One

- The Big Lie-bowski

- Oaf of Office

- Old Wack Donald

- Old Yeller

- Jabba the Gut

- Mount Flushmore

- Sulk Hogan

- Mayor McTreason

- SCROTUS

- Scrooge McSchmuck

- Jackass O’Lantern

 

- Pumpkin-flavored arsenic marshmallow

- rancid bag of half melted circus peanuts

- Ambulatory merkin

- rotting pumpkin time-lapse

- Rancid salmon filet

- a toupee someone found in a garbage can and stapled to a sweet potato

- Poorly trained circus orangutan

- Flopped over traffic cone

- Pencil-dick wall builder

- Sentient used car commercial

- Rejected holiday carrot cake

- Deranged moldy grapefruit

- Room temperature Sunny-D backwash

- Enraged over-ripe pineapple

 

- Cursed Siberian werewolf trapped in an Orangutan’s body

- Exhaustive child

- $4 billion puddle of tinted moisturizer

- ever worse human and godsend

- Wonka factory escapee

- Open-Faced Quesadilla

- Idiot billionaire and face of YouTube’s popular “Annoying Orange”

- Noted Asshole

- Asshole-American

- Ambitious corn dog that escaped from the concession stand at a rural Alabama fairground, stole an unattended wig, hopped a freight train to Atlantic City and never looked back

- shrunken apple head

- decomposing ear of corn

- permanently open mouth

- Verbal Billionaire

- deflated basketball

- cartoon plutocrat

- sentient overripe pear

- melted creamsicle

- fluffy bouffant

- gaping mouth with a hairpiece

 

 

- oozy lather of absurd hyperbole

- dick-nosed baldy

- perpetual asshole

- serially bankrupt business mogul

- television clown

- bloated spawn of a Penn Station ashtray and Nickelodeon slime

- legitimate hairstyle choice

- anthropomorphic caterpillar

-toupee’d buffoon

-bloviating billionaire

-Enlarged pee-splattered Sno Cone

-idiotic rich man

-vibrating Bologna loaf

-Deflated football

-Dried up orange

-Human embodiment of hotdog filling

-Toupee-wearing Orangina ****hole

-sentient bottle of self tanner

-short-fingered vulgarian

 

 

-Rancid tangerine

-Rejected Richie Rich Villain

-Corndog that escaped from the state fair

-GOP Presidential candidate and Bone-in Ham

-Walking sun dried tomato

-Presidential candidate and human Kewpie doll

-Adult male baby with the combover and personality of a 30 pound toddler

-Melting pig carcass

-Human cystic acne pus

-Millionaire and disgraced racist

-What would happen if a caps lock key was granted one wish and that wish was to come to life.

-Fabulist cheddar critter

-Unrepentant Bigot

-Ralph Steadman illustration come to life

-Noted Donald Trump enthusiast

-Grimacing Cheeto Fart

 

 

-Everyone’s Favorite Screaming Steamed Carrot

-Cursed Halloween Mask

-Presidential candidate and bag of flour

-Enraged animated creamsicle

-Woody Allen impersonator and Incessant Tweeter

-Time-displaced Sopranos extra

-Melted candle impersonator

-Bloviating caricature of a businessman

-Disgraced Pope impersonator

-Cable News Fever Dream

-Delusional Cheese Creature

-Lint-crusted dried apricot

-Mud clotted welcome mat

-Melting Businessman

-James Bond Villain/Republican Presidential Candidate

-Aspiring social media intern

 

 

-Drunk Monopoly man

-Cranial bee sting victim

-Stupid, racist clown

-Lint-covered sentient Cheeto

-Man-sized sebaceous cyst

-billionaire Siberian Tiger hairball

-Shriveled apricot

-Empty popcorn bag rotting in the sun

-Heat Miser with a heart of coal

-Man-shaped asbestos insulation board

-Aggravated giant duckling

-dusty barrel of fermented peepee

-gilded dildo

-usually reasonable burlap sack full of rancid Peeps

-degloved zoo penis

-Miss Cleo cosplay enthusiast

 

 

-bargain bin full of yellowing Jean-Claude Van Damme movies

-big orange buffoon

-Normal-looking human man and entirely credible choice as future leader of the free world

-overripe pumpkin from Halloween 2007

-Our nation’s loudest cheesy puff

-a dishrag that on closer inspection is alive with maggots

-Perpetual embarrassment

-Candied yam riddled with moldy spider carcasses

-wilted turkey skin puppet

-chewed-up furball

-petulant slice of stinking, festive ****-pie

-hairpiece come to life

-orange-tufted sentient troll doll

-Actual buffoon

-Decomposing pumpkin pie inhabited by vicious albino squirrels and presidential candidate

-Gross fat loser

 

 

-the shriveled pinto bean you had to pluck out of your Chipotle burrito basket

-orange gasbag

-Enraged Gak spill

-overinflated piss-blimp

-The orange beast

-Pumpkin flavored arsenic marshmallow

-Poorly trained circus orangutan

-A Flopped-Over Traffic Cone

-a fascist golem made of flypaper

-Orange Clown

-a deeply stupid person: a crude, nasty, bloviating man always willing to shout himself hoarse about terrorist Muslims, rapist Mexicans, probably-menstruating Fox hosts

-orange lunatic

-Chester Cheetah Impersonator

-American hate leader

-a tiny piece of dried cat poop that you found in your rug

-talking combover

 

 

-Cheeto-Dusted Bloviator

-Fuzzy Meat wad

-Decomposing ear of corn

-Rich idiot

-Noted Troll

-Soggy Burlap Sack

-Bag of toxic sludge

-A brightly burning trash fire

-impoverished urchin

-Aggressively Stupid

-Great Judgement-Haver

-Hair-plug swollen with rancid egg whites

-inside-out lower intestine

-decomposing pumpkin pie inhabited by viscous albino squirrels

-lead paint factory explosion

-lumbering human-like tardigrade

-fart-infused lump of raw meat

- anthropomorphic sweet potato

- racist haggis

 

 

- tragically unfinished Muppet

- neon-tinted hellion

- bulbous, reality TV-produced anti-Christ

- half-sentient rotting Halloween pumpkin

- sloshing styrofoam takeout container filled with three-day-old mac and cheese

- Cheeto Mussolini

- a buffoon; a bigot; a hater of women; a demagogue; an actual hot dog that speaks

- blustery, ****-talking gabagool Foghorn Leghorn

- rich orange-tinted walrus

- talking fart cloud

- racist pile of melted candy corn

- Inane Facebook forward come to life

- Cheeto-dust-dipped sentient potato sack

- willfully cretinous spray tanned ignoramus

- marigold-colored ball of excrement

- mentally unstable, pustulous sack of orangutan feces who most Americans wouldn’t trust around the collection plate at church

- burnt wonton covered in scarecrow pubes

- unrepentant non-Republican more likely to read Penthouse than the National Review
- shouting, shriveled piece of dried mango

-  bewildered, golden-helmeted astronaut who’s just landed on this planet from a distant galaxy

- over-microwaved sweet potato- vulgar olive loaf

- America’s rage boner

- bald eagle

- vulgar yam

- huckster

 

 

- seagull dipped in tikki masala

- flatulent leather couch

- a pair of chapped lips superglued to a hairball

- ignorant, ridiculous man who doesn't know **** from tunafish about anything beyond where to find good-quality, child-sized gloves

- half-fermented bezoar

- sun-kissed ass plug

- goose down pillow bathed in menstrual blood

- mountain of rotting whale blubber

- an enraged, bewigged fetus blown up to nightmarish size

- bursting landfill of municipal solid waste

- sputum-filled Orange Julius

- gangrenous gaping wound

- racist, sexist block of aged cheddar

- oversized wasp exoskeleton stuffed with old mustard

- neo-fascist real estate golem

 

 

- abandoned roadside ham hock

- bewildered, golden-helmeted astronaut who’s just landed on this planet from a distant galaxy

- monument to human hubris crafted out of rotting Span

- a walking pile of animated roadkill

- heaving carcass

- stately hot dog casing

- swollen earthworm gizzard

- narcissistic bowl of rotten gazpacho

- yellowing hunk of masticated gristle

- human/Komodo dragon hybrid

- blackening scab artfully hiding in your Raisin Bran

- “taco truck”

- a man who could one day become the first hobgoblin to enter the White House

- horsehair mattress stuffed with molding copies of Hustler

- malignant corn chip

- human Kinder Egg whose inner surprise is a tiny pebble of rat ****

 

 

- the sculpture your 3-year old made out of soggy ground-up Goldfish snacks

- a man with the hair of a radioactive skunk

- roiling Cheez Whiz mass

- cryogenically frozen bog man

- a glistening, shouting gristle mass with a history of saying terrible and stupid things

- screaming giant cheese wedge

- Republican frontrunner and 250-pound accumulation of rancid beef

- Day-Glo roadside billboard about jock itch

- temperamental gelatinous sponge

- sentient hate-balloon

- a Rumpelstiltskin inflated with a bike pump and filled with bacteria

- self-tanning enthusiast

- parental pile of burnt organic material

- human-shaped wad of Gak

- walking irradiated tumor

 

 

- uncooked chicken breast

- KKK rally port-a-potty holding tank

- neon-tinted hellion

- a plentiful field of dung piled into the shape of a presidential candidate

- malfunctioning wind turbine

- seeping fleabag

- a sticky, grabby, Cheeto-hued toddler with no sense of adult comportment

- figurative rubber, and also literal rubber

- a carnivorous plant watered with irradiated bat urine

- sentient waste disposal plant

- a disappointment

- poorly-drawn fascist

- racist teratoma

- lamprey eel spray-painted gold

- a hair that you pluck, causing a cluster of hairs to sprout in its place

- sunken, corroding soufflé

- nacho cheese golem

- undead tangerine

- a cartoon representation of Irritable Bowel Syndrome in a pharmaceutical ad

- fossilized meatball

 

 

- horking mole-creature suffering from radioactive spray-tan

- tattered Craigslist sofa

- a fully-grown Monopoly dog carefully balancing a sponge cake atop its head

- Play-Doh factory explosion

- a new superfood made of finely-ground clown wigs

- unkempt Troll doll found floating face down in a tub of rancid Beluga caviar

- orange bean bag chair with an old cat sitting on it

- the Nickelodeon splat

- Cheeto Jesus

- A vile stain on this Republic

- bat**** crazy crypto-fascist who destroyed the GOP

 

- flabby Fascist

- our Nation’s wealthiest fetal pig

- oversized yellow gummy bear with teeth

- tiny-fingered banshee coated in slug mustard

- mannequin covered in a chicken-skin robe hidden in the basement of a grown man who collects minion

- Jaundiced Jabba the Hut with a dead Ewok strapped to its head

- Spraytanbraham Lincoln

- a pile of faux-leather designer handbag knockoffs

- half-empty bag of rancid tapioca

- extremely rude ham hock

- French onion soup fart

- melted Claymation villain

- congealing buffalo wing cemented to outgrown armpit hair

- bewigged orange penis ejaculating hate and stupidity

 

- marlmalade hellbeast

- floppy sack of rancid chicken fat

- overboiled ham

- impacted molar

- Donzi scheme

- Orange Asspimple

- The Great Obfuscator

- orange spray-painted port-a-john

- orange pustule

- poorly dressed mantoddler

- penis shaped asteroid

 

- Ignorant thug with a lizard brain (quoted from Cher)

- Cheeto Voldemort

- Toupee Fiasco

- the Brick Tamaland of presidents

- Gassy orange goober

- Spastic man-baby

- Donny "Pantalones en Fuego"

- ****face Von Clownstick

- Satchel-Ass

- Lazy corrupt racist orange santorum-covered enemy of the people

- American albatross and the president of people who believe in UFOs

- Bunker Baby Trump

- Bunker King

- UV Don

- Yam tits

- Buttplug face

- Toupeed ****trumpet

- ****womble

- Mangled Apricot Hellbeast

- Witless ****ing ****splat

- Incompressible Jizztrumpet

- Ignorant ****muppet

- Boss Tweet

- Tiny fingered, Cheeto-faced, ferret wearing ****gibbon

 

And perhaps the most accurate and honest:

 

- The worst person alive—the pettiest, smallest, emptiest, most dishonest, most malignant ****-for-brains you could ever imagine, just an absolute worthless interpretively man-shaped lint clump from the absolute bottom of the human genetic drain

 

 

 

 

 

New one I heard today:  Darth Tax Evader

[Dan T.]

19 minutes ago, China said:

 

New one I heard today:  Darth Tax Evader

Added.  Right near the top.

[LadySkinsFan]

I don't think Pence has a chance. He's a Dominionist, American Taliban. Doesn't include meeting with women alone because women are the devil and he obviously can't control himself. 

[Larry]

He doesn't have a chance, because he's the traitor to the cause who ruined the coup attempt that we had been putting in motion for weeks, and were in the process of implementing, and would have worked if he hadn't ruined it, and we all swear didn't exist and the media is making it up. 

[CobraCommander]

14 hours ago, Larry said:

Odds of Pence making it through one state's GOP primary without being killed?  

You cannot kill that which is not alive.

 

 

The flies know.

[@DCGoldPants]

16 hours ago, Larry said:

Odds of Pence making it through one state's GOP primary without being killed?  

 

I don't know who is going to give him money to run? He's that special in the middle where both never Trumpers won't vote for him because he defended the guy, and MAGAs won't because he didn't do something he couldn't on Jan 6th.

 

It's like the folks saying Brian Kemp should run. Same deal. He is only electable in a few states. 

 

Still waiting to see if DeSantis can go to a PA or Michigan or Ohio and not come off as awkward to those audiences compared to Florida.