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The Official Heinicke Hive Thread


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Taylor Heinicke reportedly had a bowel movement today.

And it was delivered with such precision, and dropped with such great force, that it just spiraled and shot straight down the toilet pipe, without even having to flush the toilet.

The pure force of the matter against the water, created enough power to manually flush it.

Edited by Malapropismic Depository
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43 minutes ago, Malapropismic Depository said:

Taylor Heinicke reportedly had a bowel movement today.

And it was so perfecty accurate, and dropped with such great force, that it just shot straight down the toilet pipe, without even having to flush the toilet.

thanks for the update!! : )

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3 hours ago, Malapropismic Depository said:

Taylor Heinicke reportedly had a bowel movement today.

And it was so perfecty accurate, and dropped with such great force, that it just spiraled and shot straight down the toilet pipe, without even having to flush the toilet.

The pure force of the matter against the water, created enough power to manually flush it.

Probably strained a glute 

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3 hours ago, Stefanskins said:

we need more Heinicke post!!! Thank you in advance...

 

The NFL has announced that they will change the current name for a 6-point score, from "Touchdowns", to "Taylordowns"

It accomplishes 2 purposes. The first, of course, is that it gives proper respects to Taylor, as the #1 scoring machine of the 21st Century.

And also, they will not even have to change the initials "TD" to do so.

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7 hours ago, Malapropismic Depository said:

Taylor Heinicke reportedly had a bowel movement today.

And it was delivered with such accuracy, and dropped with such great force, that it just spiraled and shot straight down the toilet pipe, without even having to flush the toilet.

The pure force of the matter against the water, created enough power to manually flush it.

 I was afraid that he might be constipated and in need of an enema. Which of course marketing would then run with and a name change to the Fleet ""Hiney-Key"

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On 2/22/2021 at 6:32 PM, kingdaddy said:

 

Got these times off of the internet....Heiny is pretty fast.

RGlll: 4.41

Heiny: 4.62

Hurts: 4.59

Kyler Murray: 4.31

Deshawn Watson: 4.66

Daniel Jones: 4.82

Burrow: 4.54

Tua: 4.94

Herbert: 4.68

Mike Vick: 4.33

Mayfield: 4.84

 

I googled Joe Burrow 4.54 because that didn't sound right and I found a bunch of articles about how Tee Higgins ran a 4.54

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8 minutes ago, philibusters said:

 

I googled Joe Burrow 4.54 because that didn't sound right and I found a bunch of articles about how Tee Higgins ran a 4.54

He ran a 4.54, the dude is fast. The weird thing on that list is Daniel Jones running a 4.82. I thought he was faster than that. 

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7 minutes ago, Burgundy Yoda said:

He ran a 4.54, the dude is fast. The weird thing on that list is Daniel Jones running a 4.82. I thought he was faster than that. 

 

Do you have a link on Burrow?  I cannot find anything that looks credible.  The only thing I can find is somebody said that on a message board (sort of like here).  I googled "Joe Burrow  40 yard dash" and "Joe Burrow 4.54" and didn't see anything that looked credible.

Edited by philibusters
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7 minutes ago, philibusters said:

 

Do you have a link on Burrow?  I cannot find anything that looks credible.  The only thing I can find is somebody said that on a message board (sort of like here).  I googled "Joe Burrow  40 yard dash" and "Joe Burrow 4.54" and didn't see anything that looked credible.

Damn, google tricked me. I typed in Joe Burrow 40 time and go figure it wasn't his, it was Jalen Hurts' time, which later got adjusted to 4.59 lol. Honestly that does seem very fast for Burrow now that I think about it. 

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1 hour ago, philibusters said:

 

Do you have a link on Burrow?  I cannot find anything that looks credible.  The only thing I can find is somebody said that on a message board (sort of like here).  I googled "Joe Burrow  40 yard dash" and "Joe Burrow 4.54" and didn't see anything that looked credible.

I was the one who posted all of the 40 times and that's what I found for Burrow....I didn't have to look to hard for any of the times. I'll see if I can find it again for you...

1 hour ago, Burgundy Yoda said:

He ran a 4.54, the dude is fast. The weird thing on that list is Daniel Jones running a 4.82. I thought he was faster than that. 

I just checked again and found two times on Burrow....the one that flashes right up in bold numbers is 4.54....HOWEVER, his official combine time is 4.9!!!

What are we to believe??? Both times? Maybe the 4.54 is from an LSU pro day or something cause that's quite a difference. Finding his times on Google isn't hard, they come right up.

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On 2/26/2021 at 4:29 PM, Malapropismic Depository said:

Taylor Heinicke reportedly had a bowel movement today.

And it was delivered with such precision, and dropped with such great force, that it just spiraled and shot straight down the toilet pipe, without even having to flush the toilet.

The pure force of the matter against the water, created enough power to manually flush it.

Again, just another reason why we don't need Watson or anyone else....We've found are man.

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10 minutes ago, kingdaddy said:

I was the one who posted all of the 40 times and that's what I found for Burrow....I didn't have to look to hard for any of the times. I'll see if I can find it again for you...

I just checked again and found two times on Burrow....the one that flashes right up in bold numbers is 4.54....HOWEVER, his official combine time is 4.9!!!

What are we to believe??? Both times? Maybe the 4.54 is from an LSU pro day or something cause that's quite a difference. Finding his times on Google isn't hard, they come right up.

 

Burrow runs so fast...he runs so fast, that he literally runs out of his pants...

Don't believe me ?

 

 

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27 minutes ago, kingdaddy said:

I was the one who posted all of the 40 times and that's what I found for Burrow....I didn't have to look to hard for any of the times. I'll see if I can find it again for you...

I just checked again and found two times on Burrow....the one that flashes right up in bold numbers is 4.54....HOWEVER, his official combine time is 4.9!!!

What are we to believe??? Both times? Maybe the 4.54 is from an LSU pro day or something cause that's quite a difference. Finding his times on Google isn't hard, they come right up.

Yeah I saw that too, I just quickly typed it in but didn't bother to investigate the link that came with it lol. When you click the link it starts talking about Jalen Hurts and you can see that's who that time is for. 

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On 2/28/2021 at 6:47 AM, Malapropismic Depository said:

 

Watch out, here comes the Heinicke Hype Train !!!

 

 

trainwreck GIF

 

Nah, I think most people just viewed Heinicke as a guy who earned a chance to compete.  The early arguments have been settled and he'll get the chance. 

THE END.  (Close Thread)

giphy.gif

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22 minutes ago, Califan007 said:

 

Saw this on twitter...actually was harder for me to answer than I expected.

 

 

 

EvVtHfPWQAM9Sm1.jpg

 

Start Heinicke since he's the best option on the WFT at this point.  Cut Jones since he's a turnover machine, and bench Hurts unless he's the best option at QB.

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7 minutes ago, Berggy9598 said:

How on the rails was it to begin with 

Well...it went from a solid play by play of his on the field talent to a play by play of his solid bowel movements. Lol

Edited by wunderhill
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