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The Miscellaneous Humor Thread---vids/gifs/pics/jokes---no articles, no "owned" stuff

Jumbo

By Jumbo
in The Tailgate

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Die Hard

Die Hard

Posted
Posted

I got to relive a moment of my history.

 

I was 13... playing tennis with my buddy when it started to rain. We took off on our bikes to avoid the down pour. He was well ahead of me.

 

I was riding on my road bike 18-speed as fast as I can.... and I took a real wide turn with my head down.... and smacked head on into a parked van. Looked up just at the last second. And woke up the middle of someone’s lawn.

 

Thank goodness no one saw that embarrassing moment. On the flip side, no one was available to help. I wonder what any neighbors may have thought watching me crawl around the block.

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EmirOfShmo

EmirOfShmo

Posted
Posted
2 minutes ago, Die Hard said:

I got to relive a moment of my history.

 

I was 13... playing tennis with my buddy when it started to rain. We took off on our bikes to avoid the down pour. He was well ahead of me.

 

I was riding on my road bike 18-speed as fast as I can.... and I took a real wide turn with my head down.... and smacked head on into a parked van. Looked up just at the last second. And woke up the middle of someone’s lawn.

 

Thank goodness no one saw that embarrassing moment. On the flip side, no one was available to help. I wonder what any neighbors may have thought watching me crawl around the block.

I did something similar at about the same age: At the bottom of our street I was turning left on a busier street (1 lane each side divided by a double line). It was a tight left turn close to the curb. A quick look left - no cars coming. I was looking back to the right so I could cross over to the other side. A car was parked about 3 car lengths from the corner that I didn't see when I first looked left (before I turned). I hit that car at a pretty decent speed. I landed on the hood & the fork on my bike was bent. Funny, not a scratch on the hood or the front of the car. I had to walk my bike back home....lol That car was never parked there. My newspapers (the Post) were dropped off every morning at that corner so I was damn confident before the turn that it was clear. LOL WRONG! 

image.png.337ec7cb9e9c95a79fe2579db429fabb.png

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Die Hard

Die Hard

Posted
Posted
10 minutes ago, EmirOfShmo said:

I did something similar at about the same age: At the bottom of our street I was turning left on a busier street (1 lane each side divided by a double line). It was a tight left turn close to the curb. A quick look left - no cars coming. I was looking back to the right so I could cross over to the other side. A car was parked about 3 car lengths from the corner that I didn't see when I first looked left (before I turned). I hit that car at a pretty decent speed. I landed on the hood & the fork on my bike was bent. Funny, not a scratch on the hood or the front of the car. I had to walk my bike back home....lol That car was never parked there. My newspapers (the Post) were dropped off every morning at that corner so I was damn confident before the turn that it was clear. LOL WRONG! 

image.png.337ec7cb9e9c95a79fe2579db429fabb.png

 

Those split second decisions. At high rates of speed. You win some, you lose some.
 

They don’t make vehicles like they used to.

 

Oddly, my bike wasn’t worse for wear though.

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TheGreatBuzz

TheGreatBuzz

Posted
Posted (edited)
5 hours ago, Die Hard said:

I got to relive a moment of my history.

 

I was 13... playing tennis with my buddy when it started to rain. We took off on our bikes to avoid the down pour. He was well ahead of me.

 

I was riding on my road bike 18-speed as fast as I can.... and I took a real wide turn with my head down.... and smacked head on into a parked van. Looked up just at the last second. And woke up the middle of someone’s lawn.

 

Thank goodness no one saw that embarrassing moment. On the flip side, no one was available to help. I wonder what any neighbors may have thought watching me crawl around the block.

 

5 hours ago, EmirOfShmo said:

I did something similar at about the same age: At the bottom of our street I was turning left on a busier street (1 lane each side divided by a double line). It was a tight left turn close to the curb. A quick look left - no cars coming. I was looking back to the right so I could cross over to the other side. A car was parked about 3 car lengths from the corner that I didn't see when I first looked left (before I turned). I hit that car at a pretty decent speed. I landed on the hood & the fork on my bike was bent. Funny, not a scratch on the hood or the front of the car. I had to walk my bike back home....lol That car was never parked there. My newspapers (the Post) were dropped off every morning at that corner so I was damn confident before the turn that it was clear. LOL WRONG! 

image.png.337ec7cb9e9c95a79fe2579db429fabb.png

 

I think most people here know the story of how I got the name Buzz by getting hit by a car while I was sleeping in bed when I was a kid.  A lesser known story is about the 2nd time I got hit by a car.  I (age 7) was living in Drum Point at the time near Solomons Island, MD.  My Dad, two sisters, and I were going to visit my mom in the hospital (she had just been diagnosed with MS but she is still doing well, no sympathy needed).   My sisters were taking too long getting ready and I asked by dad if I could ride my bike to the end of the street and back.  He said yes.  I take off down the road to where it ends in a T intersection where my road is the "bottom stem".  On the corner was a large bush preventing me from seeing any cars coming from the left.  Granted this is at the time a pretty rural area so traffic was rare.  Well as my luck would have it, I rode right out into the cross street to turn around and this time, there was a car coming.  Luckily, the driver wasn't going very fast but I got hit and woke up in the yard across the street.  The lady came out of the house and helped carry me back home.  I don't remember a lot of it but she said I would not stop crying because my bike was smashed and I wanted to carry it home with me.  Anyways, dad got my sisters and drove us all to the hospital.  I went to the ER while dad and sisters went to see my mom.  I was fine, just some stitches.  But my dad got the unfortunate job of explaining to my mom why I wasn't visiting her but was instead in a bed downstairs.  I remember they wheeled her down to me while I was getting stitched up.  

 

Interesting side note is the guy that hit me was a friend of my dad's who lived behind us.  I used to sit on his knee while he played poker with my dad and other neighbors.  He would tease me that if I didn't straighten up, he would hit me with his car again.  His name was John Hansen.  He was the last keeper to live in and operate the Drum Point Lighthouse in Solomons Island, MD.  

 

Quote

Fourth Order Fresnel Lens, Drum Point Lighthouse c1983. Clear, close original 7” x 9” press photo shows great detail of the large fourth order lens with John Hansen pointing out details. Drum Point Light is one of three surviving Chesapeake Bay screw-pile lighthouses. Originally located off Drum Point at the mouth of the Patuxent River, it is now an exhibit at the Calvert Marine Museum. Built in 1883, Drum Point Light originally housed a fourth-order Fresnel lens whose red light could be seen at a distance of eleven nautical miles. Photo is b/w and includes date and credit line and description on back, some cropping marks. Dated August 18, 1983. Clear and close view. (VG+). 

http://lighthouseantiques.net/Maryland Chesapeake Bay.htm

1185.jpeg

Edited by TheGreatBuzz
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