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Florida....? oh yeah, Florida.


mcsluggo

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This is what happens when you don't get the strawberry milk and a mop like you're told:

 

Florida man uses wife's head as mop after sandwich fight

 

FRUITLAND PARK, FL (WESH/CNN) - Authorities said an argument over a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and milk ended up with one man's arrest after he was accused of using his wife as a mop.

 

Keith Davidson, 46, was arrested for battery against his wife, who is not being identified. She said he has turned into a monster and showed off bruises on her arm.

 

"When I went to go grab the peanut butter I hit the cup of milk, the cup of milk fell on the floor," the wife said.

 

...

 

Police said Davidson used his wife's head as a mop to clean up the spilled milk on the floor.

 

 

"And to use me as a dish mop, it's not the first, not the second, not the third time. But I can't take no more," the victim said.

 

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Police: Florida boy, 8, tries to rob grocery store at gunpoint

 

WEST PALM BEACH —
An 8-year-old boy tried to hold up a West Palm Beach grocery store Wednesday night, the West Palm Beach Police Department said.
 
The boy walked into King Foods & Meat Bazaar, pulled a loaded gun from his sweater and pointed it at a cashier, demanding money, investigators said.
 
"He was wearing like a motorcycle helmet, and he was wearing a sweater over his mouth,” the clerk said. “He was only showing his eyes."
 
Another employee then snatched the gun from the boy, who tried to escape the worker’s grip, witnesses said.
 
"When I grabbed my purse, it was so light,” said Eboni Alls, the boy’s mother. “I'm, like, I knew I was missing something. I said, ‘Where my gun?’ The first thing I thought was I hope Jaden don't have my gun."
 
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Fox News - Florida man arrested for throwing alligator through drive-thru window
 

I haven't laughed so hard reading an headline in a while...

 


1455080376883.jpg?ve=1&tl=1
 
 A Florida man was arrested Monday and charged with assault with a deadly weapon without intent to kill after allegedly throwing an alligator through a fast-food chain’s drive-thru window in October.

Joshua James, 24, threw a 3.5 foot alligator through a Palm Beach County Wendy’s drive-thru window nearly four months ago, according to Florida Fish Wildlife and Conservation officials. He was also charged with illegally possessing an alligator and petty theft.
...

 

Parents interview
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hS3Qpaos9sA

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POLICE BLOTTER: Woman faces child neglect charge after being found passed out, naked

 

BAKER — A 24-year-old woman faces a charge of child neglect after she got drunk while caring for a young child, lawmen say.

 

AR-160209177.jpg

 

According to the Okaloosa County Sheriff’s Office, the woman’s father came home after being away for about two hours and found his daughter, Whitney L. Kilcrease, lying unconscious on the floor with the child playing nearby. When she awoke, she became violent and started using profanity, the father said. She went next door to her uncle’s house and locked the door.

 

...

 

A deputy found Kilcrease lying face-down on the floor without any clothes on. “When I tried to talk to Whitney, her speech was slurred and unintelligible as well as unable to stand,” the deputy wrote.

 

...

 

Later, she told deputies when her father left to run errands she started drinking Captain Morgan rum and doesn’t remember anything after that until she woke up in the hospital.

 

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PBSO: Boynton grandma has sex in front of grandson

 

A 42-year-old grandmother high on Xanax, morphine and vodka had sex in the bathroom of a suburban Boynton Beach’s community gym while her 2-year-old grandson was in her care, the Palm Beach County Sheriff’s Office reports.

 

Another child, whose age was not released, told police he saw April Purvis, 42, “having sex” in the bathroom at the Indian Hills community’s rec center with a man and heard them moaning, the arrest report says.

 

Purvis, who faces a child neglect charge, had her grandson in the bathroom with her, investigators say.

 

purvis_april.jpg

 

The child told police a man emerged from the bathroom and gave the child money to go away. When the boy returned, he saw Purvis unconscious on the bathroom floor holding both her grandson and a knife, he told police.

 

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Florida Senate endorses making computer coding a foreign language

 

TALLAHASSEE - Florida senators overwhelmingly approved a proposal Wednesday to allow high school students to count computer coding as a foreign language course, although questions linger about whether the two subjects should be considered one and the same.

 

The Senate passed Sen. Jeremy Ring’s bill (SB 468) by a 35-5 vote.

 

“With this bill, we’re putting a stamp on it: Florida is a technology leader in this country,” said Ring, a Democrat from Margate and a former Yahoo executive. “We are truly, in this state, pioneering something that I believe will be a very significant trend.”

 

Ring said, if it becomes law, the computer-coding measure — which would take effect in the 2018-19 school year — would be the first of its kind in the country. He said “dozens of other states are looking at this.”

 

But critics of the proposal worry it could dilute students’ cultural education and place a burden on public schools that already lack adequate technology resources. The bill includes no funding to improve students’ access to computers at school, and Ring has maintained his proposal has no financial impact on districts.

 

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TALLAHASSEE - Florida senators overwhelmingly approved a proposal Wednesday to allow high school students to count computer coding as a foreign language course,

 

 

 

 

 

“With this bill, we’re putting a stamp on it: Florida is a technology leader in this country,” said Ring, a Democrat from Margate and a former Yahoo executive.

 

 

 

You're doing it wrong.   :rolleyes:

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  • 2 weeks later...

I had to make a touch choice about whether to put this story here, or in the naked people rum amok thread.... 

 

 

choices choices choices

 

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/crime/fla-woman-charged-dui-driving-waffle-house-article-1.2555707

 

 

 

Florida woman charged with DUI after driving into Waffle House while not wearing pants
NEW YORK DAILY NEWS
 
Monday, March 7, 2016, 2:57 PM

 

see link for more (but really the headline says it all)

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  • 2 weeks later...

Hubby drove with wife ON ROOF OF sport utility vehicle

 

A man who apparently drove several miles with his wife on the roof of his Toyota sport utility vehicle was jailed on a reckless driving charge, according to records and Stuart police.

 

Stuart police about 12:16 a.m. March 22 stopped Richard Addy, 69, after noticing “a female riding on top of a vehicle as the vehicle came to a stop” at South Kanner Highway and Southeast Monterey Road.
 
Police helped the woman, identified as Addy’s wife, off the roof.
 
Addy said they argued after drinks at a restaurant in Palm City and at a bar at a resort on Hutchinson Island. They were staying at the resort because of work being done to their Palm City home.
 
After an altercation at the resort, Addy said he decided to leave.
 
He said he didn’t realize his wife was on the roof of the vehicle, which police reported was a 2011 Toyota SUV.
 
“Addy stated at the first traffic light after the Sewall’s Point bridge, he heard her banging on the roof and realized that she was there,” a report states.
 
He said he kept driving with her on the roof because he lacked a cell phone to call police.
 
“Addy stated that he drove to the Martin County courthouse in the hopes of finding police presence,” the report states.
 
Locating no law enforcement officers there, Addy drove to the intersection where he was stopped.
 
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Cops: Florida mom abandons kid, heads to ‘sugar daddy’ pad, pees on and punches police

 
A Florida mother is accused of ditching her child and urinating on officers when they found her in her “sugar daddy’s” apartment.
 
Daytona Beach police said that Jennifer Cael, 34, no longer wanted her child, according to news-journalonline.com. When officers attempted to arrest her last week, she punched one in the chest and urinated on them, according to the report.
 
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