Bang Posted December 22, 2013 Share Posted December 22, 2013 DALLAS @ WASHINGTON In latest attempt to be fired, Mike Shanahan compares gay sex to Tony Romo sits to pee throwing 4th qtr INTs in magazine interview. Cowboys win 28-27 MIAMI @ BUFFALO Due to global warming, Dolphins will play in Buffalo rain instead of usual blizzard. Thanks a lot OBAMA! say Bills fans. Phins win 26-14 INDIANAPOLIS @ KANSAS CITY After another spectacular game Jamal Charles delights fans with balloon animals, light humor & clever card tricks. Chiefs mash Colts 36-20 NEW ORLEANS @ CAROLINA Drew Brees forgets words to pregame cheer, covers by lip synching One Direction song for camera. Confused Saints fall to Panthers 37-28 ST LOUIS @ TAMPA BAY Epic Bucs Rams game hailed as "Best time to finish Christmas shopping". Rams lay an egg, Bucs win 5th game of the season 24-20 CLEVELAND @ NEW YORK JETS During halftime tribute to beloved Christmas Story movie, Jets trained seal Mark Sanchez sticks tongue to frozen goalpost. Browns win 26-14 VIKINGS @ BENGALS Josh Freeman caught photocopying his ass during Vikings Holiday party, casting his future in doubt once again. Bengals win big 36-24 DENVER @ HOUSTON Visiting QB Peyton Manning miffed when Houston tour bus guide mistakes his forehead for the Astrodome. Broncos crush Texans 38-10 TENNESSEE @ JACKSONVILLE In Holiday charity event, all fans attending Jaguars Titans game to be given 40 oz beer, lottery ticket & ½ gram of meth. Titans win 27-17 ARIZONA @ SEATTLE Engineer admits Seahawks stadium designed to look like vagina. Earth shaking noise feature was pleasant side effect. Cardinals lose 24-21 NEW YORK GIANTS @ DETROIT Eli Manning makes such pathetic loser faces that Sara MacLachlan plans to use his pics in next animal cruelty commercial. Lions win 34-17 NEW ENGLAND @ BALTIMORE Giselle inconsolable after seeing hubby Tom Brady linger too long during postgame fanny pat with Joe Flacco. Ravens defeat Patriots 28-24 PITTSBURGH @ GREEN BAY Big Ben tries to get out of meaningless Steeler game by wearing Aaron Rodgers jersey & hanging out on Packers sidelines. Steelers win 27-14 OAKLAND @ SAN DIEGO Over / Under on parking lot stabbings for Chargers Raiders game currently at 6. Chargers win 31-10 CHICAGO @ PHILADELPHIA Fun fact: Over the holidays more people commit suicide listening to Cris Collinsworth than any other time of year. Eagles defeat Bears 30-20 SAN FRANCISCO @ ATLANTA ESPN forced to run parental advisory during disturbing coverage of hapless Falcons defense trying to stop 49ers run game. 49ers win 31-13 ~Bang Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.